#reside
*“For the tomorrows are where the promises resides
…that determines tomorrow's flavours”*
Marshal Gebbie
**a long day in the city, tired in way that only
a New York City can happily tax a body,
awaken just momentary before midnight,
greeted by two disparate realities and peeks of what just
past the bend might bring,
one man laments with utter love
the disappearance of his beloved behind the wall of dementia,^
and another,
by email, newly arrived from New Zealand,^^
inflaming a sensing the common nearing, future of our demarcations,
and yet, he, we,
double down to push yet another blocking boulder off the road,
always one more,
on the collective property that our humans minds share,
with an optimism,
that makes me pen, instantly,
for I am choice-less; now as before,
inhabited
by demon devils and good people,
crying out to all the winged muses hovering, come aid me, unmuddy these rivers of darkest chocolate interlacing the loveliest
of buttermilk vanilla
coursing mightily through a re!freshened brain,
all the clashing contradictory flavours demanded from me
by the powerful quietude of silence
that opens a new day, even though dawn may yet be
many hours away
here I am scribbling, words dripping, page staining,
after a long period
of my soul’s inability to pierce the Jerusalem city walls
of no inspiration,
and the contra~indicators of sanity and its opposite number,
of glowlights of positivity so deep rooted,
that even a lighting strike cannot knock
Oak
down, though deep may be the scars residual,
in a dark home,
where the evidence of life is in a handful of lit windows
across the avenue, of the adjacent sleep noises,
all signals that though spent,
we are not yet rent,
that life’s pleasuring are well and holy embraced with smiles demure,
recalling tales of past that are sugaring our souls, and the saddening
reminders fresh,
that all this, too, shall pass,
our own markers, unique,
all becoming, will be coming
with us
of course,
there is no resolution formidable to these warring states
of mind, and nowadays days,
repetitive searches for the perfect word we once knew too well,
oft come back as
N.C.A.
an acronym of tired sparks saying, that word, beloved to you is,
“not currently available”
as if it has been perma!checked out of the library,
unable to be returned…
the clock has moved us unwillingly to what was the morrow,
to well into the here and now,
and the swirling swishing eddies smashing into each other
yet palpitating vigorously our soul’s surfing,
muscular chested musings,
and our pangs of hunger for perfect certainty of
what will become of me are quietly stored back on the shelves,
of the closeted acceptable uncertainty,
my eyes revert to back to Marshal’s words,
and I make this
promise
to anyone within eyeshot, across this
global sphere,
that whatever are the colours of my continuous searches for that perfect mot,
will end only
at a time and place of,
with words of,***
mine own choosing
12:57am
Sun Nov 23 2025
<nml>
Nov 23, 2025
Nov 23, 2025 at 1:41 AM UTC
Do I still take your breath away or has that power expired?
Leave me to my own devices because I’m growing tired
And for a little while you lead me to believe you’re done
Until the moment I start losing interest in which direction your feet run
And I say I no longer care but we both know it isn’t true
Honestly I do not give a ****
About anything except you
The only thing ricocheting against my set of bones
Is your name bouncing like drumsticks on xylophones
For once I get to perform our song
Music to my lonely ears
Skeleton an instrument producing every note brain hears
Have my mutilated perception record melody
When finished play it over so I can sing off-key
And leave on your doorstep to remind you of what we had
When I am done realize I still feel just as sad
And screams bottled up press on the walls of my insides
Threatening to expose the place heartache hides
Slide shapeless secrets even deeper down the slope
Drowning damaged moments in a mess of distraction and dope
One
Two
Three
I count numbers to ground racing thoughts
Break the anxious flow in a failed attempt to untangle mental knots
I will go to extreme lengths to relieve madness in my mind
Waiting for comfort desperately needed but can never seem to find
And my own flesh torments with mocking memories
Using tattooed ink for leverage to ridicule and tease
A traitor amongst body parts equally writhing in despair
Breath inhaling solitude coursing through the stagnant air
Lifeless eyes exhausted from overwhelming cruelty they view
You put up careful facades but ******** is easy to see through
X-rays of faithful adoration reveal commitment a disguise
Well-rehearsed remorse when stripped is nothing more than lies
And crumpled promises fill the trash can with empty words you said
Same old disappointment cuts
Blood staining hands bright red
Stomach full of excuses violently crammed down my throat
Those plus dead butterflies swell causing my tummy to bloat
My heart now lies in throbbing pieces scattered across bottom of my soul
In the exact spot you used to reside within my chest is now an unfathomable hole
Dec 23, 2020
Dec 23, 2020 at 2:54 AM UTC
please don't
doubt how
much love
for you
resides in
this heart
of mine,
and,
please take
good care
of the heart
that lies
in the palms
of your hands.
Aug 11, 2020
Aug 11, 2020 at 12:10 AM UTC
Another Dawn has come again,
I am so thankful for my friends;
Each one of them stands by my side,
within my heart, they all reside.
~
They fill me with a sense of pride,
I feel so lucky I'm alive;
They always have the time to help,
they've put me on a pedestal.
~
When I laugh or cry my tears,
they've always there, through the years;
I have their backs, they have mine too,
there's nothing that I wouldn't do.
~
I try to improve their life's so much.
from each of them, my life's been touched;
All I can say is, "Thank you all,"
for making me feel ten feet tall.
Apr 24, 2019
Apr 24, 2019 at 8:40 PM UTC
I want to unchain this torturous strings
Strangling every hope I insist to have
In the life I thought I owned for a lifetime
But I was wrong, this life was never been mine
It is to the monsters whispering inside my mind
Chaining every part of me
Tainting my soul to black
Yet, even if they reside inside of me
I don't own them, they own me;
Every night they sing to me lullabies of hatred
Never letting me see the light the world offers
Those monsters will never stop taunting me
Until I learn to find a way to end this life.
Jul 24, 2018
Jul 24, 2018 at 10:36 AM UTC
you worth more than you think
you are more beautiful than you know
you are stronger than you believe
and you are loved
oh
so
loved
when will you realize
the love living within my heart
resides
survives
exists
only for you
Nov 3, 2017
Nov 3, 2017 at 10:18 AM UTC
*Forget not
That at the lowest part of the humble path
Resides the divot
Which concurs and divides
Not passing feet
But yearns to keep the honest truth
Which is bestowed upon the earth
By means of rain
Teeming with life and oxygen
How it tries to keep itself within
Both without fail, and with inevitability
Because the water will certainly soak or sway
But the divot itself will forever stay
Embedded in the earthly clay
Beneath our walking feet
So forget not to tread lightly, ever so
On this, the placid soil underneath*
May 31, 2017
May 31, 2017 at 5:01 PM UTC
Jo mere dil mein tu basi hai, (If inside my heart you reside,)
Toh zindagi ki har khushi hai, (Then I have all happiness in life,)
Na jaana – Na jaana jaanam mujhe chhod ke, (Don’t leave me alone,)
Na jaana – Na jaana mera dil tod ke… (Don’t ever break my heart…)
Tum se hi mera hausla hai, (My morale is from you,)
Tum se hi har faisla hai, (From you each of my decisions,)
Tere bagaer zindagi, begaani… (Without you my life is, stranger…)
Tere bagaer zindagi, veerani… (Without you my life is, emptier…)
Tum se hi jaana pyaar kya hai, (I have known love after knowing you,)
Tum se hi nayi zindagi hai, (Knowing you only I have a new life,)
Tere bagaer zindagi, begaani… (Without you my life is, stranger…)
Tere bagaer zindagi, veerani… (Without you my life is, emptier…)
Jo mere dil mein, tu basi hai, (If inside my heart you reside,)
Toh zindagi ki har khushi hai, (Then I have all happiness in life,)
Jo tu nahin toh, kya zindagi hai, (If you aren’t here, what my life is,)
Jo tu nahin toh, kya zindagi hai... (If you aren’t here, what my life is...)
Jul 13, 2016
Jul 13, 2016 at 6:40 AM UTC
Imprisoned
by boundaries of time
lost moments slip away
into an eternal abyss
wandering
outside the mind
alone
unable to wonder
where only infinity
and truth reside
unrecognisable
amidst the elemental
molecules of matter.
Nov 2, 2014
Nov 2, 2014 at 3:47 AM UTC
*If inside my heart you reside,
Then I have all happiness in life,
Don’t ever ever leave me alone,
Do never never break my heart…
My morale is from you,
From you is each of my decisions,
Without you my life is, stranger…
Without you my life is, emptier…
I have known love after knowing you,
Knowing you only I have a new life,
Without you my life is, stranger…
Without you my life is, emptier…
If inside my heart you reside,
Then I have all happiness in life,
If you aren’t here, what my life is,
If you aren’t here, what my life is…*
Sep 11, 2014
Sep 11, 2014 at 2:06 AM UTC
Where the black sky meets the water,
Where the current's even stronger,
Where your tattered heart resides,
Where your broken dreams lay,
That's where I hope to die.
Aug 15, 2014
Aug 15, 2014 at 11:16 PM UTC