#rehearsed
She advertised everything I wanted
Upon purchase it was nothing I needed
If only there was more time allotted
The warning signs could've been heeded
With the foundation now rotted
I'm reseated all alone and resented
Not fully unexpected,
But fully defeated
Deflated and almost deleted
Then the process gets repeated
©2024
Sep 6, 2024
Sep 6, 2024 at 2:58 PM UTC
They tell me, they promise me, I'm not alone
But I can only go by what I've always been shown
Unwanted, undesirable, freek show, just a small sample of all I've known
I wish my inner abuser would adapt another tone
I don't own my own thoughts, any positive feeling is only on loan
People act like I hone in on this curse to be worthless
Like I thirst to be anxious
Like I have to coerce this anger and bitterness
Like I enjoy being immersed in the hopeless
Like my first thought is the worst on purpose
Like I enjoy all my deep rooted issues constantly rising to the surface
Then comes the question that brings me back to reality
"What are you doing to get control of this? Not enough certainly"
Honestly that's another cog in the circle mosh pit of misery, part of the continuity
I'd give anything for it to be as easy as everyone claims it should be
Because what most people see from me is rehearsed
My final diagnosis can not be reversed
The totality of my issues couldn't possibly be unearthed
But that doesn't change the horrible landscape I've traversed
I wouldn't be able to tell you what I'm worth, all I know is...
...I am this, for what it's worth
©2024
Jan 13, 2024
Jan 13, 2024 at 5:26 PM UTC
There are bells here
Silent bells
They seem so out of place
Surrounded by the immaculate stonework
And accompanied by righteous statutes
Stilled angels
Their silent echoes
Reverberate off of the people
Who stand in perfect mockery
Of the stone figures scattered about the church
All of them here to partake
In an obsolete tradition
Of grief
An unmistakably deathly feeling
Fills the air
However the feeling is foreign to me
And I cannot comprehend
This ceremony of antique sorrow
For the breathing statues Morn
As if their tears were rehearsed
and what I feel is so raw
A silent moment is called for
and as if on cue the bells toll
three times, just three
Silence, sorrow, death,
All marked by
The tolling of the bells
Mar 23, 2015
Mar 23, 2015 at 10:26 AM UTC
Everyone loves you
the world is your stage
each line well rehearsed
you’re the latest craze
yet alone in the darkness
a child cries out
unmasked and revealing
a heart filled with doubt
today they love you
what if tomorrow they don’t
how well will you sleep
knowing your demons won’t
May 25, 2014
May 25, 2014 at 8:47 AM UTC