#regulation
(what lives in me before I understand)
It begins in my body
long before my mind arrives.
A surge, a flicker,
a trembling at the root of me
that says:
we are already feeling.
There is no stillness
that does not ripple.
No calm
that doesn’t carry the hum beneath it -
not peace,
but a kind of readiness.
Like lightning waiting just behind the skin.
I used to try to stop it.
To breathe it away.
To silence it
before it unraveled me in front of someone else.
But it only grew sharper in the hiding.
It only screamed louder
the more I tried to be soft.
Now,
I listen.
Not because I’m unafraid,
but because I’m done pretending
this isn’t me.
This intensity -
it isn’t a problem.
It’s a language.
One I’ve been speaking since before I had words.
Maybe even longer.
Maybe it was handed down,
a birthright carved from all the grief
my blood couldn’t name.
It leaves when it wants to.
Returns just as quickly.
There is no asking it to stay gone.
Only learning
not to run
when it comes back.
And so I live
with this current in me.
I build small shelters around it.
I move gently
but not away.
I say:
I hear you.
You don’t have to beg.
Jul 31, 2025
Jul 31, 2025 at 1:46 PM UTC
So theoretically, if one made mass profiles on individual users via telecommunications data, for instance, using cell towers one could seperate individuals on a spectrum of information. By directing cell traffic to specific servers. Put the angry with the angry. Put the suicidal with the suicidal. Even seperate by tax bracket if one wanted. Control the rate of dissemination of any kind of information. Who sees what. When they see it.
You could even craft a narrative for one to follow.
Because now there is machine learning,
And that makes all of this possible.
Obviously, this would have to be done internally by each respective company.
Unless one had a backdoor or "pass-through."
Apr 10, 2025
Apr 10, 2025 at 9:19 PM UTC
When my emotions
are out of my control
and are controlling me,
I seek awareness of my emotions
by expressing my emotions
into a voice diary
using the microphone on my computer:
upon expression
the intense-energy of my emotions
dissipates
and my mind is clearer;
then it is easier
to self-regulate my emotions
or at least
discipline my emotions;
then I am ready
to strive
for joy and happiness.
Jul 24, 2019
Jul 24, 2019 at 10:54 PM UTC
Proteins oh Proteins,
How much you do for us!
You are our support
The framework keeping us up
The bones under our skin
You are the mad scientist
encouraging chemical reactions within us
Enzymes, catalyzing reactions
You are our traffic regulators
Signaling how much,
Hormones
Like insulin regulating glucose in the blood
You are the detectives within us
Figuring out what it bad
Then flagging it for destruction
You are our truck drivers
Shuttling materials to
and fro
Hemoglobin, carrying oxygen from the lungs
You are our storage
Our shelves packed to the brim with
materials
Like ferritin storing iron in our bodies
There is so much you do
That is key to our survival
...
However shall I remember all you do
for my test tomorrow?
Sep 23, 2018
Sep 23, 2018 at 7:50 PM UTC