#regretful
I lie awake at night
Wondering what went wrong,
And why,
Just why I didnt fight.
Will I spend the rest of my life regretting
The choice to run before you spoke,
Just in fear of a little sting
That I thought at the time would be the worst thing?
Jokes on me, I guess.
The worst, instead, was the choice
That'd leave me tearing myself apart for years on end
Just because I was afraid to mend.
What if life were different?
What if Id chosen to wait?
But I guess it's no matter, friend.
I'll just be alone til I'm hundred and eight.
Mar 16
Mar 16, 2026 at 2:39 AM UTC
i keep on trying to make it work,
but could it, if only to me it means the world?
i'm getting old
& it becomes harder to get how to leave, letting you on.
i wish i never let it happen,
now i'm a slave of my own desired end.
Dec 18, 2025
Dec 18, 2025 at 1:11 PM UTC
Well look at me here
All the worst decisions
Towards doom I steer
The fading of my visions
Come find me in your world
I'll hold you dear,my arms curled
Even if the world stands against us
We will weather all it has hurled
Oh darling
Hurt me like you used to
Oh my love
Is there anything I can do?
How must I, prove my intent true?
Love falls into a question
But I know its not a myth
It's a privilege
Only a few are blessed with
Don't you dare leave
You know you're more than a kith
Hey you
Come find me
Hey you
Together we shall be
Apr 11, 2025
Apr 11, 2025 at 11:49 AM UTC
About love I never knew
Until a girl walked into view.
Rude,me,cold as ice
Melted over her almond eyes.
Never liked sharing my seat
But for her I wanted to defeat.
I cast a shadow, chilling the bone,
With my dream girl I was not on my throne.
Always my emotions in crowd remain concealed
But to her I wanted my soul to get revealed
When nothing going on my way,
She my sunshine on a cloudy day.
Want her to be mine
For my faded photographs,
she was the filter of shine
Confessed my love under the starry sky
Moonlight heard, "yes" was her reply.
2 Months cherry blossom in town
She was my goddess, I longed for her
to wear my devotion's crown.
On August 19 storm was dreadful ,
Loving her become regretful.
Faked the love from the start
A trap, to earn a place
in her so called friend heart .
For her us was a game, I was a fool
The player played well and used me for a tool.
My ship of love sank in betrayal ,
Scar of this will always be here.
Now I am a frozen lake
Given up on beautiful things ,at end it aches.
Jan 24, 2025
Jan 24, 2025 at 3:42 AM UTC
PLEASE LISTEN to your ELDERS,
For THEY KNOW WHAT IS BEST,
CLING ON to THEIR WORDS,
LET IT
MARINATE, and REST.
DON'T COP AN ATTITUDE, or
GIVE THEM ANY LIP,
(JUST PLEASE RESPECT YOUR ELDERS), and
(KEEP YOUR LIPS ZIPPED!!!)
They say:
(THERE AIN'T NOTHING NEW
UP UNDER THE SUN!!)
(THEY'VE BEEN THERE AND
DONE THAT), and
(YOU ARE JUST HAVING FUN!!)
SO, YOU BETTER BE CAREFUL,
COS, the GOING GETS TOUGH,
THEY SAY:
KARMA is a B**** and
IT WILL BITE YOU IN THE ****
OUR ELDERS KNOWS BEST,
THEY HAVE BEEN AROUND THE WAY,
CAN TELL YOU STORIES WAY BACK
UNTIL THIS VERY SINGLE DAY
I'M JUST BEING HONEST!!!
NO SHADE,
NO LIES,
BE RESPECTFUL,
NOT REGRETFUL,
OF THE WORDS OF THE WISE!!!!
B.R.
Date: 8/19/2024
Aug 20, 2024
Aug 20, 2024 at 1:33 PM UTC
do not let yourself fall in love with someone who is similar to me. for someone like myself will kiss you at all of the most beautiful places in the world, just like art galleries, beaches, and sanctuaries, because then you will never be able to visit such places again without having the taste of blood lingering in your lips.
do not let yourself fall in love with someone who is similar to me. if it takes remembering your name among the lonesome souls, i would forget my own if it means remembering yours. i will make you believe that storms are peaceful and that suffering is a pleasure. you will be swept away by the yearning in craving over something that is consistently reaching but never ready to hold you.
do not let yourself fall in love with someone who is similar to me. with someone who are reminiscent like me, i will wreck your home and hurl apologies at you, which will break apart on the floor and hurt you when you walk on them. i will come to fret about having loved you so passionately. i will always be regretful that i gave it my all without stopping to consider that i was becoming increasingly hurting so bad and exhausted. i will always be sorry that i let myself be fooled by the illusion of your love.
do not let yourself fall in love with someone that obviously acts like me—loves like me for the reason that they are all ghosts from the pieces you broke in me. keeping your safe distance from someone like me is not something you should consider doing. people like me are time bombs; when my mission is complete, i will spatter sorrow all over your walls in violent hues that would let you regret your door had never known my name. i'll never master the art of being gentle. despite the weight of our shared history, i would not be flushed away by the chapter of our repressed memories. you will never be free of the shadows you left behind. and the ghosts will forever haunt you.
humans will always find a way to end things and leave.
we always do.
and when i am gone, you will fully understand
the reason why storms are named after humans.
Jun 30, 2022
Jun 30, 2022 at 1:28 PM UTC
NOW LIFE’S GONNA BE DESPAIR
LIFE’S GONNA BE ****** AND FROZEN
LIFE’S GONNA NEVER BE HAPPY AGAIN
LIKE I HAD WHEN I WAS YOUNG
‘CAUSE I REGRET THE DECISION I’VE MADE
‘CAUSE I BROKE THE BRIDGES I BUILT
‘CAUSE I LEFT THE ONES I LOVED
WHICH DESTROYED MY FUTURE
AND STAINED MY BLOOD
I’M NOT THE ONE I WAS
OR I ASSUMED ME TO BE
I CAN’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE
I’M SO SURE AND I GUARANTEE
‘CAUSE IT’S IN MY ROOTS, IT’S IN MY VEINS
IT’S IN MY BLOOD, IT’S IN MY BRAIN
TO BE CARELESS, TO BE RECKLESS
TO DESTROY EVERYTHING, TO FINISH MYSELF
AND SO, I MISS MY BEST FRIEND I HAD
I MISS MY CHILDHOOD I PLAYED
I MISS THE FLASHBACKS I ADORE
WHEN LIFE WAS A PARTY TO BE THROWN
BUT THAT ALL WAS TWO YEARS BEFORE
May 17, 2021
May 17, 2021 at 9:43 PM UTC
Is there a feeling worse than regret?
Knowing you’ve done something against yourself and only you are to blame?
What’s more poisonous than being able to live and relive the events of the past?
Than being able to see the rippling effects your actions have?
I cannot imagine anything worse
Than to be stuck in my own body
Than to experience myself so intensely
Knowing what I did
Knowing who I hurt.
I cannot imagine anything more frustrating
Than making mistakes and then knowing
How I could have done better and
Realising the limits of my own cognition
And the stupidity of my own ego.
I ask myself why
But the question only drives me mad.
I spit at my own reflection and
Cower into a corner and long for
A few seconds of non-existence.
I am ugly,
Ugly in the soul,
Ugly in the bone,
And no
These mistakes are not normal.
How can I be my own victim and perpetrator so easily?
And then wake up with dread that I’m not necessarily safe for myself?
I am stuck.
I did know better
But I didn’t do any better,
So what the actual f*ck?!
Apr 12, 2021
Apr 12, 2021 at 6:52 AM UTC
I’m an expert
at what I do.
Every drop
of my every being
is good at being me.
It’s my only choice.
every action I do
trapped in myself
in my choices
in my mistakes
in my beautiful mind
as most have
It’s what I was
always made to be.
Since it was written
in the stars
mostly deep in
cells of my blood
in the coded chains
in the atoms
that make up
the long depths
of my soul:
I am me and
I am ******* good at it.
Mar 11, 2021
Mar 11, 2021 at 5:13 PM UTC
Let me support you , while you hang from the cliff edge .
Let me congratulate you on destroying
every past thing said .
As if it meant nothing from the start .
Creating misery across life, like it was art .
Who knew you'd go that far .
But guess what , I'm still here .
How do you explain away the scars ?
Do your stories , only match the ones
You deemed greater then us ?
Do you give their life pain with the feelings of
distrust?
So why only me Love ?
Feb 9, 2021
Feb 9, 2021 at 2:30 AM UTC
I'm glad I never met your face;
I'm glad you're far from home;
I'm glad our meetings never came,
so I could cry in bed alone.
I'm glad our worlds were not the same;
I'm glad we had our different zones;
Of time and space; of heart and mind—
of suffering—all which is my own.
For if we met, and found each other
Mapped every corner, bend, and contour,
I'd find I'd regret the day that I met you,
since seeing you would've hurt me more.
Oct 17, 2020
Oct 17, 2020 at 8:20 PM UTC
The two ol' pals are facing each other.
He passes a glass of poison
to his dear guest, leaning
near the front door, slightly opened;
and he's learning the reason—
why he's standing there,
about to storm out of the stone-cold apartment—
'bout to burst in tears
shedding the vivid droplets
that shouldn't be belonging to a mere ghost.
Yet he's fleeting, escaping the scene still,
while the owner of the kitchenette
is putting back the bottle
to where it belonged;
and he's gone, present no longer.
The drink on the rock—left on the shelf—
is evaporating, following the vaporized guest,
leaving the scent of faint alcohol
that lulls the other friend to regretful sleep.
Aug 31, 2020
Aug 31, 2020 at 10:20 PM UTC
I wake up in the morning and
I look into the mirror wandering why I'm still alone
You used to be the most familiar face
And now you're gone
And I'm thinking back on all that
I've done trying to remember what I did wrong
But you know that I can't cause I did nothing to you, you just gave up
I'm curled up in the middle of the room,
sitting on my knees, my face in my hands, my heart begging please...
'Someone fill me up I'm incomplete'
And my daddy never liked you but you's still got along
He warned me bout you, but I thought he was wrong
Babe you had me fooled right from the start,
I hate you for breaking my heart
One day, one day I'll get you back.
Nov 11, 2018
Nov 11, 2018 at 6:29 PM UTC
There are days where I’d like to think I don’t remember you at all
But memories stay and when I think, our memories are all that I recall
No matter how hard I refrain from thinking your name my train of thought comes to a halt
My sub conscious collects change from the strange silhouettes that remain stationary waiting for their stop to be called
They act cautious as my brain begins to strain and forgets what’s true or false anticipating for the top to come off
Sep 25, 2018
Sep 25, 2018 at 11:06 AM UTC
Broken piece pierce the atmosphere.
Rocket ships to the floor beneath.
Shards of shimmering fragments form
Sharp edges rocking
Swaying to the music of momentum.
Just enough so one might see,
That beautiful whole that once was me.
Sahn 7.17
Jul 27, 2017
Jul 27, 2017 at 2:03 AM UTC
One day she said to me
Mommy, I want to be like you.
But what she doesn't know, because she's too young to understand is that I don't even want to be me. I don't even know who I am.
I hide in my room to escape the judgements
I can hear their thoughts through their eyes. They try to solve my problems without even knowing them. They don't know how alone I feel and how torn I am between wanting to be a mother of two or a sad woman. I cannot be both. I push everyone away and immediately want them back. I'm always just hoping they will stay no matter how hard I push.
I wish I could erase all of those terrible memories from my children's heads. They don't talk about it. They just move on and I stay in regret. This puddle of regret that I love to bathe in.
Jul 14, 2015
Jul 14, 2015 at 2:09 AM UTC
Some things never matter
Some people never care
Some souls never wander
Some heroes never dare.
Some lips never smile
Some eyes never stare
Some love lasts for a while
Some hearts break and wear.
Some books stay with dust
Some flowers die under the rain
Some friends we can't trust
Some stories end up in vain.
Some tongues speak lies
Some smiles take away pain
Some kisses end loud cries
Some promises never remain.
Some glitters never shimmer
Some fame doesn't last a lifetime
Some sad songs forget about summer
Some writers forget about dime.
Some poems are just written
Some poems are out in the sun
Some poems are carefully hidden
Some come out when the poet's gone.
Sep 1, 2014
Sep 1, 2014 at 11:25 AM UTC
And I learned that I should watch my mouth
Inspect the words I blurt out before they come about
Manifest into knives and cut the feelings of the listener
Make me come off as a natural born sinner
The friends become thinner as I manage to cut ties with my own teeth
I beat my brain and cheeks with suffering secondhand
I give birth to the bad but refuse to raise it.
-zaba
Jun 30, 2014
Jun 30, 2014 at 4:12 PM UTC
Can we putter away
a hundred and more days
when all we ever wanted
is to be found at last
in this totally murky space?
Do we regret the hours
we spent together
savoring the words
that don't even matter
to anyone, anyhow
locked up hands
among the naughty crowd?
Shall we toss these letters
out our blood-stained windows
and wished for something
that hadn't caused us jitters
like a genuine touch
from a mother that really cares
but 'twas all lust
we just gave in to our fears?
How do I hate what I didn't mean to love?
Must have been wise enough to know
I could've written a better show
Just that mad to have been carried away
by your love that only crossed my way
unfortunately,
half a day.
Mar 24, 2014
Mar 24, 2014 at 5:53 AM UTC