#reached
To you I applaud.
Your eyes will always say more,
Than that you covey with,
Words and gestures recalled.
Thank you for your sypmathy,
And what you can afford with empathy.
What I can't explain,
You hold and wait.
For my words and what comes,
From them.
I'm sorry to fill your plate.
But you say it's ok.
It is not yet full,
And you could never have enough,
Of me!? You forgive my confusion,
You believe in my pull.
I'll still say what a fool.
Don't you see this pool?
I don't see where I'm standing,
Yet you're here with me.
The water is nice,
And I'm so good at,
Pretending to breathe.
Now we've rolled the dice.
Save yourself,
You are what is important.
Fate is not with me and,
I am not boyant.
After my admiration,
Please float away.
To show my weight,
Can't hold you and my obsession.
To sink rather than swim.
I can give you the excuse,
Of currents and lack of strength.
That goes to no length.
Your eyes tell me those,
Are my lies.
So why? When we try,
Do my feet stick.
The tears add to the pool,
And I move in everyway.
The ground swallows my ankles,
Making soft shackles.
I'm so good you believe too,
That I can breathe.
Thank you for listening to my plea.
I watch your eyes,
As they let go.
You now float and the grip,
It weakens then slips.
I'll say goodbye and standby.
I can breathe I say.
It was the best anyone could do.
You can't float, you don't want to.
It's better here, hidden, keep them safe.
Dec 3, 2020
Dec 3, 2020 at 6:07 PM UTC
astonished by the relentless pounding of my mind
the threshold has been reached, breached, and unleashed
unleashed to the smugness and complacency within themselves
can you hear the outrageous containment
can they exist in harmony
what to do, oh what to do
Brian Hill - 2020 # 40
Feb 9, 2020
Feb 9, 2020 at 10:29 AM UTC
I reached the hill
now there is silence
Thought I took the right pill
felt like hope wasn't a form of violence
But when I met myself at the highest bit
I didn't know what it meant
The hill was really a pit
a hell heaven sent
Feeling fragile
wearing nothing but torn dresses
as the devil became more agile
I dream of him as he trespasses
I reached the hill
it's silent
My own abandoned town
filled with ghosts and defilement
Burned my notes of obsession
cinder on my lashes
for a brief moment I see flames of possession
as dark eyes rain down ashes
The devil's got ahold of me
he brought flowers filled with poison
I grew a field of them, a flowery sea
silence came as I shut the noise in
I reached
My silent hill
poisonous oceans will hide
as I keep us still
the devil always in sight
Sep 19, 2018
Sep 19, 2018 at 8:35 AM UTC
Whe. I lift my head
To expel a breath in a long sigh
The cool air being moved by the fan
Causes my hair
Loose tangled strands,
To wave about
In a celebratory dance
Of relief
At last
Jul 12, 2018
Jul 12, 2018 at 11:08 PM UTC
Initially everything seems to be clear in mind with regards to what needs to be done at the present moment in time, since steps are there to follow.
Step by step one step at a time.
One by one, only one step at a time.
Every step that is reached upon gets registered in the mind with the next step to follow.
Definitely a moment in time will come when destination will be reached,
however, later on it’s realized that destination is part of what’s there in mind while steps are part of the present moment in time.
In one way or other,
in some way for sure,
what seems to be there at the present moment in time in the present is not what seems to be going on in mind.
Twists and turns are part of life and life is not that simple as it was thought to be in the mind, initially at the first instance itself.
Over a period of time it’s understood, realized, agreed and accepted that with experience many things change in life, however, there are certain things in life that remain the same as they are,
as they were,
a few amongst them are as follows.
A few things are difficult to learn and at the same time a few things that you know are quite difficult to explain.
A few things are difficult to adhere to, but if not done will lead to and result in chaos and confusion while in the present with regards to future.
A few things are difficult to know,
initially at first instance itself,
but still the mind remains firm,
makes a clear resolution that at all cost I will know and learn this new thing of which I have got something at the back of my mind.
Amongst everything and all that you know,
one thing remains clear for sure,
where there is a will there is a way,
make a way of your own and if that’s not possible,
then find one.
Interesting are the ways of life when it seems that things will fall in place,
but then it takes much more time than what’s required by them initially to fall in there respective places and then to follow them with regards to what's next that needs to be done.
Most of the time the desire to achieve success in life is not greater than the drive that is gathered in mind over a period of time,
success then becomes a part of life and life seems beautiful.
Definitely, where there is a will there is a way.
Nov 14, 2016
Nov 14, 2016 at 7:27 AM UTC
The world is a fast changing place
Everything changes and keeps on changing till the end is reached upon when something is achieved.
Seldom when the end is reached upon there still remains more to be achieved.
Along with time comes experience and maturity.
Often it happens that when something is achieved, yet a larger part of the picture still remains to be completed.
At this juncture starts the beginning of something new,
definitely keeping in mind the prior experience.
Changes taking place in the outside world are part of everyone’s life.
It’s destiny, something written in destiny, part of destiny.
It’s fate.
Once everything is discussed, decided, reviewed, revised and a conclusion is reached upon, time now to take the necessary line of action.
Think about it and think again
Everything going on in the mind has got some reasoning and accordingly respond towards change.
Think about it and think again.
Review the past, revise, rewind and recognize the past.
Always keep in mind, never remain forever in the past.
It’s obvious to think about present in the present moment of time when something is going on in the mind with regards to the future.
It’s serves like an alarm, a wakeup call
Certainly there will always be something to look out for with regards to the future.
Always it’s important to keep in mind the right moment in time so as to ascertain the future.
Hope and anxiety go hand in hand
When there is a hope for something positive to happen in life, then at that moment in time the mind becomes anxious.
As of now what else needs to be done in the present with regards to the future, definitely there will be something else to look out for with regards to the future.
Nothing changes on it’s own, absolutely nothing
When a change happens it comes along with time
Efforts have always been made in the past when a change takes place in the present.
Different is the present, different from past.
Different will be the future, different from the past and present.
When changes are taking place in the present always keep in mind a desired line of action needs to be ascertained and then taken.
The right step when taken at the right moment in time makes all the difference in the present and also along in the future.
So even if one step is taken at a time always make sure it is taken with a positive frame of time
Irrespective of the changes taking place, an efforts always need to be made to achieve the aim, which has been ascertained by the mind prior.
Positivity attracts positivity and then the desired change happens
So always accept a change with a positive mindset, then move ahead towards what has been ascertained by the mind prior.
Nov 25, 2015
Nov 25, 2015 at 8:33 AM UTC
All parties agreed upon That ongoing war till the end Simply because they have reached That deal without signing any documents ... It's that point of no return that All parties usually reach When they want to go hopelessly and endlessly Until the end as a kind of Upon me and upon my whole enemies .
Feb 10, 2015
Feb 10, 2015 at 3:40 PM UTC
Why I've reached my
destination so late,
should I blame
myself or my fate.
So early I
left my abode
and took the
desired road.
Walked relentlessly
through sunshine and fog
but with stone I chased
every barking dog.
Dec 17, 2014
Dec 17, 2014 at 9:15 PM UTC
How did I love you
you reached for my hand
but I never took it
I'm still thinking I can
You went to that mountain top
you stood up strong and tall
then came out my hand for you
all you wanted to do was fall.
Jun 6, 2014
Jun 6, 2014 at 12:27 AM UTC
I wrote a poem for my biography to a special person about Adam, I thought you would like to read it.
Blue Heart
You were 18, so many years in front of you.
It felt like a dark eternity, you didn’t want to go.
I saw it in your sunken eyes.
The vacant stare and sad dark eyes.
I saw when you were sitting around the table prom night.
So much going around but you were too calm
too collected.
too inside your mind for us.
I knew that blank expression from experience
All too well.
You screamed for help
silent and loud
I reached for your hand
but you
f
e
l
l
You were poised and calm
Broken but full of love.
All I wanted to do was help you.
you were standing still when the world went on
and it did go on, it did, without you.
When you were standing there at the edge
I wondered about you, all in my head.
We were short lived, a friendship that was fast.
You came, changed me, then you left.
it came and went in a flash.
I knew when no one else could guess.
you put it all on me, didn’t you.
but I was not cross with you.
Heartbroken, yes
scared, yes
alone, yes
mad, no
Your color was blue
Blue heart, blue veins
Blue is the color of our planet
from far far away
we wore it proud it was all for you,
a blue solemn silence.
and the world spun fast and
all the people hurried fast, real fast
and no one ever smiled.
You weren’t all there, in that head of yours.
dark and empty
you were sad but you lived like you would die
tomorrow
tomorrow came too soon and it was up to you.
it was always up to you.
Meeting you was bitter
you put me through stress, anxiety and heartache
you put me through shame and shock
All I wanted was you by my side,
and you there was not.
Meeting you was sweet
you gave me smiles and laughs,
good music and thoughts
you gave me a feeling of friendship and care.
All I wanted was you by my side,
but you were not there.
You were poised and calm,
you rubbed off on me.
I was hyped and excited
you called me “ADHD”
You drove an old red beater with water bottles everywhere,
with **** in the glove compartment.
but you didn’t care.
Your drove with sunglasses and the FM radio loud.
You drove in silence, thinking no doubt.
You loved the sun but you would hike for the shade
when we were together you took me away.
I didn’t think, I didn’t have nerves.
We talked about the world
We talked about life
You had a life you thought you didn’t deserve.
Whoever planted that seed
had some **** nerve
you wrote like me but I wrote for myself
you wrote for us when there’d be nothing else.
I knew when no one else could guess.
you put it all on me, didn’t you.
but I was not mad.
Heartbroken, yes
scared, yes
alone, yes
mad, no
When you were gone
I read
and
I read
i wanted to know exactly when
you felt what you felt.
You called me your jav friend
you called me your angel
You are up there watching over me
I yelled and screamed
I couldn’t breathe.
I shut them out,
I cursed at you.
I hated you
I cried for you
I only see you in my head
Dreaming once and a while of your smile,
of your eyes
but they are never dark
they are never sad
they are never empty
The vacant stare is not there.
your hair is a giant mess
and I freeze that moment right there.
You said you were alone
you said it was a secret
you asked me about my darkest
and you told me all your secrets
I have never been in that much peace knowing I kept you there
It felt like moments when it was hours and you were gone too **** soon.
tomorrow came too fast and it was up to you.
it was always up to you.
Now I wear a band on my wrist
and pray for your peace
that is all I have left,
but you mean so much to me.
I hope you are happy,
I hope your journey has ended
and you found what you wanted
My heart was once broken
but soon if all this is true
it will be mended.
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 1:27 PM UTC
My hand and gripped hair
The threats?
"I CAN rip you out, I just CHOOSE not to."
Is is fear, despair, madness, loathe?
The answer is empty of meaning.
What is known would be ignored,
as all said seems true,
but fake.
Boundlessly vain.
silly,
worthless;
doubtful.
What am I looking for in this effort?
I know.
I see.
I hear.
I believe.
One thought twigs into another.
I even wonder if the ocean can breathe.
Breathe life into me.
Aliens don't exist,
but nightmares and demons do?
A problem,
unwanted.
A result,
unwanted.
An answer,
only a lie,
....
unwanted, unwanted, oh so unwanted.
I scream inside,
and every inner glass is shattered.
I yell,
"Notice of Insanity Uprising!"
They yell back,
"That's Life."
Upon those words I numb my mind,
I release my grip.
I let go of everything.
MY face: gone
MY body: gone
MY hope: gone gone gone
Anything and everything that was me leaves,
and my body becomes a cadaver.
Drifting side to side,
in and out.
It's more calm now though.
My mind is no longer driving me crazy.
For we have reached our destination.
Apr 6, 2014
Apr 6, 2014 at 10:00 PM UTC