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#racing
To slide back in the mix— I need one good hit, a tip sheet from Bacchus. a horse that smells like fire and bourbon, early lick in its veins, more heart than Joe Louis, more grit than LaMotta in a smoke-filled ring, more power than Marciano. I need the odds blinking my way from the tote board, eight to one or better, and the racing gods to glance down through the Hollywood Park clouds and wink. Just six furlongs, one round of thunder, and then— I’m back. Back in the roar of the track, the clatter of hooves and the smell of dirt, degenerates and dwarves, painted-up ****** hot dogs, spilled beer, pick-up lines flying, and the blazing neon, neon lights bleeding like a saxophone solo out of a tavern door. One twisted blessing, one break, one flash of luck, snatched from the ******* gutters, and I’m alive—back in it, in the crowd, in the chaos and clamor, in the smell of sweat and mustard, with a scrape of discarded lottery tickets and pennies from a Vons parking lot that don’t belong to anyone but me, the taste of victory, sweet and bitter, on the roof of my mouth. The track buzzes underfoot, the horses’ hooves still ringing, my dad’s gruff voice and my little brother’s laugh etched in the caverns of my mind, and for one small, perfect home stretch, I’m back in the game. The private symphony of Providence flowing through my veins, every nerve pulsing, vivid, and every shadow… grinning… like it knows… the at-the-wire surge.
0
Jan 5
Jan 5, 2026 at 9:01 AM UTC
Back in the Game
So, there was this rainbow over the north end of the meadow, as I so happened to look that way, and think to say I saw it this way, a thing of beauty for its own sake, that happened not to say a thing. =========== Wisdom knowledge understood, things essentially random as raindrops, making mortals reared on soft awe expletives hesitate to say… for some goodness sakes, hope is any day's substance, hope with no new sign since the Pleistocene ========= Judge a race begun with a rainbow over my valley, our valley, but more mine, for my part as you slept in peace, I watched it fade. I won a prize I'll not mention, I began by being where I was today. My advantage, my position on the whirling world, today.
0
Sep 22, 2025
Sep 22, 2025 at 11:24 AM UTC
So, there was this rainbow
fingernails to rock crawling up this mountain, sweat fills the air, my cheeks flushed, embarrassed of how much effort it takes me to deal with this burden but it's okay, as long as I make it one more day. I will have won the race against myself.
0
Aug 11, 2025
Aug 11, 2025 at 12:08 PM UTC
Racing Myself
Within days to lose your eyesight fear boils from inside darkness complete never mind to drive away racing cars impossible retinas now stars in the sky now that I am the passenger in my own car, along for the ride I observe now I truly see
0
Apr 2, 2025
Apr 2, 2025 at 1:53 AM UTC
Detached
over snow fields chimney smoke versus clouds                          racing shadows
0
Feb 21, 2025
Feb 21, 2025 at 7:18 PM UTC
00111 11110
Take a seat, you look tired Did you hear what she said she liked our smile, she admired Don’t trust them remember what happened last time Please shut the **** up I’m trying to think of a rhyme You are trying to heal yourself, you think you can do that Don’t tell me to look back at the **** chat You weren’t good enough for them, you think your good for the new group It’s not going to happen, it’s not going to loop Oh please your so ******* stupid, you care too much about people Shut the **** up please, you and OCD are evil We bring you back to reality, make you see things you don’t see I’m not getting high again, I’m not getting the Peace-Tea You don’t need a therapist, just keep being numb You made me ashamed of where I came from They laughed at you for your old skin color, didn’t they Wish I could shut you up, wish there was a way You used to talk to me every night when your heart was hurting You make me ******* suicidal, stop flirting Like how you did with death multiple times, once with the rope and now with the pills They care about me okay, I know that **** I told them gave them chills Why can’t you leave my head alone Bought to **** you up and leave you red and blue, maybe break a bone Oh please not this **** again, you ****** up my mind enough Not just me but that girl also made it rough I still have the scar from her, you guys ****** up my feelings Yeah we did and you were almost hanging from the ceiling The numb feeling is wearing off, almost cried in front of them You think they give a **** your not a rare gem You know our family cares about us, they don’t hate us Oh please remember the last time you tried to talk to them and what did y’all discuss Please they never dealt with anybody with my type of mind, it’s their first time Nah if they could they would sell you, actually nah you ain’t worth a dime You don’t believe any compliment we get, we have no vanity Have you not looked at the mirror, your hideous, honestly what’s this insanity Come on they seemed really nice, maybe they were into us though We are going to get in the way and you already know Take a seat, you look tired Did you hear what she said she liked our smile, she admired Don’t trust them remember what happened last time Please shut the **** up, I’m trying to think of a rhyme
0
Jan 9, 2025
Jan 9, 2025 at 8:20 PM UTC
Self-Talk PT.1
Take a seat, you look tired Did you hear what she said she liked our smile, she admired Don’t trust them remember what happened last time Please shut the **** up I’m trying to think of a rhyme You are trying to heal yourself, you think you can do that Don’t tell me to look back at the **** chat You weren’t good enough for them, you think your good for the new group It’s not going to happen, it’s not going to loop Oh please your so ******* stupid, you care too much about people Shut the **** up please, you and OCD are evil We bring you back to reality, make you see things you don’t see I’m not getting high again, I’m not getting the Peace-Tea You don’t need a therapist, just keep being numb You made me ashamed of where I came from They laughed at you for your old skin color, didn’t they Wish I could shut you up, wish there was a way You used to talk to me every night when your heart was hurting You make me ******* suicidal, stop flirting Like how you did with death multiple times, once with the rope and now with the pills They care about me okay, I know that **** I told them gave them chills Why can’t you leave my head alone Bought to **** you up and leave you red and blue, maybe break a bone Oh please not this **** again, you ****** up my mind enough Not just me but that girl also made it rough I still have the scar from her, you guys ****** up my feelings Yeah we did and you were almost hanging from the ceiling The numb feeling is wearing off, almost cried in front of them You think they give a **** your not a rare gem You know our family cares about us, they don’t hate us Oh please remember the last time you tried to talk to them and what did y’all discuss Please they never dealt with anybody with my type of mind, it’s their first time Nah if they could they would sell you, actually nah you ain’t worth a dime You don’t believe any compliment we get, we have no vanity Have you not looked at the mirror, your hideous, honestly what’s this insanity Come on they seemed really nice, maybe they were into us though We are going to get in the way and you already know Take a seat, you look tired Did you hear what she said she liked our smile, she admired Don’t trust them remember what happened last time Please shut the **** up, I’m trying to think of a rhyme
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40
Hyper fixated my mind keeps on racing with entwined and abrasive slights to my native ways and my nature always finding a way to sabotage and engrain a sense of imminent danger along with the worst ways to mend and to gauge making positive changes on how I appear to myself in my brain I'm hyper fixated My mind keeps on racing...
0
Aug 1, 2024
Aug 1, 2024 at 7:19 AM UTC
Looping
when I am running on fumes you fill me up. igniting my engine to throttle a bit harder. A bit faster. you rev me up regardless the number of bumps, regardless the amount of twist and turn, in the road ahead. my heart belongs to you. propelling me towards the sunset. the reason I speed down the street in this passionate flight. Not afraid to jump any unsuspecting hill. most might think that I am crazy, the way that I drive. if they knew the reason why, they'd press the pedal down as well. when I am running on fumes, rev me up, rev me up. Darling rev me up. I am a well-oiled machine with a place to be. whether towards the moon or the sun. you're the gasoline that ignites the spark that pushes me to go a little further.
0
Jul 9, 2024
Jul 9, 2024 at 11:42 PM UTC
Gasoline
racing           bark and froth tok  -   toy  -   tok beating    against the clock the insistent derange    against time                only    enforces    the medium
0
Mar 8, 2024
Mar 8, 2024 at 4:17 PM UTC
01 1011
Little footsteps in this moon dust sand, I chase my memories as they flee my grasp, Racing the clouds to embrace the sun. A heart, content, is left on your doorstep, I hope, someday, the person you are meant to become will trace back the way I came and exchange the goodbyes we once hung out to dry. But until then, here in this momentary stillness An opportune silence blooms into this heart of mine, And it seems I've misplaced it in your moonlit palm
0
May 15, 2022
May 15, 2022 at 1:23 AM UTC
Racing the Clouds
To get back in the game, I need one good hit. A horse with early lick; that has more heart than Joe Louis and Jake LaMotta combined. I need decent odds, at least 8-1. The racing gods have to smile on me one more time. At least for 6 furlongs, and then baby, I'm back in the game.
0
Aug 6, 2021
Aug 6, 2021 at 5:19 PM UTC
One Good Hit
Yeah yeah I see it now Your cold embrace And sweat on the brow Sure sure it might have been The sleepless night Full of wicked sin Blah blah was your last line Into a wasteland And here’s my sign
0
May 21, 2021
May 21, 2021 at 6:34 PM UTC
Yeah, Sure, Blah
A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE DEMON INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING A SCREAMING BULLET TEARS FROM HELLS OWN KEEP THUNDER QUAKES OF LAUGHTER FROM THE BELLY OF THE BEAST A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE EVIL INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING A STREAK OF LIGHTNING BOLT BLISTERING THE EARTH TREMBLING AND SHAKING LOOSE OF HELLS OWN HEARTH MUSCULAR SKELETAL CONTORTING BODY BRACED IS FORCING SPITTIN SPARKS GRINDIN' WHEELS KICKIN' FAST AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS FLIRTING WITH PSYCHOSIS THIS MADNESS TAKES 'A' HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN A SPINNIN' WHEEL GRINDIN' SPARKS AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M GRIPPIN' HARD ON A SPINNIN' WHEEL KNUCKLES WHITE ICY COLD I'M GRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES MY SOUL I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL SPITTIN' SPARKS ON THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL WAITIN' FOR THE DEATH KNELL PEEL A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE DEMON INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING A SCREAMING BULLET TEARS FROM HELLS OWN KEEP THUNDER QUAKES OF LAUGHTER FROM THE BELLY OF THE BEAST A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE EVIL INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING THIS RUPTURED CHASM ERUPTS SPLINTERING THE HEAP WILDFIRE SPITTING FROM INFERNAL DEEP MUSCULAR SKELETAL CONTORTING BODY BRACED IS FORCING SPITTIN SPARKS GRINDIN' WHEELS KICKIN' FAST AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS FLIRTING WITH PSYCHOSIS THIS MADNESS TAKES 'A' HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN A SPINNIN' WHEEL GRINDIN' SPARKS AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M GRIPPIN' HARD ON A SPINNIN' WHEEL KNUCKLES WHITE ICY COLD I'M GRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES MY SOUL I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL SPITTIN' SPARKS ON THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL WAITIN' FOR THE DEATH KNELL PEEL THESE DARK WINGS SPREAD OVER MY HORIZON REIGN IN EVIL REIGN IN FREEDOM REIGN IN HELL THESE RIVERS RUN WITH BLOOD FLOWING TO THE FLOOD THESE RIVERS RUN WITH BLOOD FLOWING TO THE FLOOD FROM THE GNASHING TEETH OF THE JAWS OF HELL RASPING GASPING SEETHING AND BREATHING MOVING FASTER THAN THE TOLL OF THAT FATEFUL BELL WREAK CRAKE SHREIKS AND SHAKES THE HEATH WINDIN' DOWN THAT STEEP SLIDE SLIPPERY SLOPE LANDSCAPE RACING THROUGH MY MIND WINDIN' DOWN THAT SLIPPERY SLOPE LANDSLIDE RACING THROUGH MY MIND WINDIN' DOWN THAT STEEP SIDE SLIPPERY SLOPE BLACK TRACKS RACING THROUGH MY MIND
0
Apr 24, 2021
Apr 24, 2021 at 8:19 AM UTC
Black Serpent
A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE DEMON INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING A SCREAMING BULLET TEARS FROM HELLS OWN KEEP THUNDER QUAKES OF LAUGHTER FROM THE BELLY OF THE BEAST A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE EVIL INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING A STREAK OF LIGHTNING BOLT BLISTERING THE EARTH TREMBLING AND SHAKING LOOSE OF HELLS OWN HEARTH MUSCULAR SKELETAL CONTORTING BODY BRACED IS FORCING SPITTIN SPARKS GRINDIN' WHEELS KICKIN' FAST AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS FLIRTING WITH PSYCHOSIS THIS MADNESS TAKES 'A' HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN A SPINNIN' WHEEL GRINDIN' SPARKS AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M GRIPPIN' HARD ON A SPINNIN' WHEEL KNUCKLES WHITE ICY COLD I'M GRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES MY SOUL I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL SPITTIN' SPARKS ON THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL WAITIN' FOR THE DEATH KNELL PEEL A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE DEMON INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING A SCREAMING BULLET TEARS FROM HELLS OWN KEEP THUNDER QUAKES OF LAUGHTER FROM THE BELLY OF THE BEAST A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE EVIL INSIDE ME GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING THIS RUPTURED CHASM ERUPTS SPLINTERING THE HEAP WILDFIRE SPITTING FROM INFERNAL DEEP MUSCULAR SKELETAL CONTORTING BODY BRACED IS FORCING SPITTIN SPARKS GRINDIN' WHEELS KICKIN' FAST AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS FLIRTING WITH PSYCHOSIS THIS MADNESS TAKES 'A' HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN A SPINNIN' WHEEL GRINDIN' SPARKS AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M GRIPPIN' HARD ON A SPINNIN' WHEEL KNUCKLES WHITE ICY COLD I'M GRIPPIN' WET MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES MY SOUL I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL SPITTIN' SPARKS ON THE DEVIL'S HEELS I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT MINDS BLEEDING THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL WAITIN' FOR THE DEATH KNELL PEEL THESE DARK WINGS SPREAD OVER MY HORIZON REIGN IN EVIL REIGN IN FREEDOM REIGN IN HELL THESE RIVERS RUN WITH BLOOD FLOWING TO THE FLOOD THESE RIVERS RUN WITH BLOOD FLOWING TO THE FLOOD FROM THE GNASHING TEETH OF THE JAWS OF HELL RASPING GASPING SEETHING AND BREATHING MOVING FASTER THAN THE TOLL OF THAT FATEFUL BELL WREAK CRAKE SHREIKS AND SHAKES THE HEATH WINDIN' DOWN THAT STEEP SLIDE SLIPPERY SLOPE LANDSCAPE RACING THROUGH MY MIND WINDIN' DOWN THAT SLIPPERY SLOPE LANDSLIDE RACING THROUGH MY MIND WINDIN' DOWN THAT STEEP SIDE SLIPPERY SLOPE BLACK TRACKS RACING THROUGH MY MIND
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113
Faltering plans An indecisive mind, Consistency in itself is an art An explosive start! Followed by; Fumbling fingers and idiotic ideas. What next? Do we pitstop like Hamilton? We were in pole position. Reassert, focus and keep on track. We are the drivers of our own Destiny...
0
Apr 3, 2021
Apr 3, 2021 at 6:45 PM UTC
F1 problems
Racing thoughts do me no good Why they wait for when I lay I never understood, Darkened hours when all I want Is to drift in skies with unfocused eyes From twisted hells to jubilant highs All forgot, the following day
0
Mar 19, 2021
Mar 19, 2021 at 4:06 AM UTC
Restless
the smoke in my lungs, tears in my eyes, he is the break in my heart I am suffocating; Time. he squeezes, he grips, demands, limits, leaves no survivors; Time.
0
Mar 14, 2021
Mar 14, 2021 at 11:16 PM UTC
Suffocating
I was feeling down depressed and dark. I put some rocks in my cup to uplift my spirits, to climb out of the hole. I want to run on the clouds and touch the sun; go 180 around the third turn. Feel nothing but the wind; go out like Earnhardt Sr. in a blaze of glory. Last lap last run.
0
Jan 30, 2021
Jan 30, 2021 at 3:05 PM UTC
Rocks in my Cup
I hate you and your new car.                                              I hope every time you go to the gas station, it's three dollars per gallon. I hope you make so many enemies that there's a line to sugar your gas tank, I hope your engine knocks and your head gasket blows and your timing belt snaps and your rims warp and your tires pop every time you pass my street. I could still beat you in a race, even with your ugly sport package and plasti-dipped grill, I could still beat you in a race because I am angrier than you. I am angrier than you, and I always will be.                                                                                                 I hate you,                                                                                    And I hate your new car.
0
Jan 14, 2021
Jan 14, 2021 at 10:39 AM UTC
Censoring the Mazda 3
There’s a storm In my brain But the rain Is clear
0
Jan 6, 2021
Jan 6, 2021 at 4:26 PM UTC
Brainstorm
Why can’t I go to sleep? When I do it just repeats. “I don’t care if you don’t like this beat It’s what I think, it’s me, it’s me,” She said to herself in her bed. I’m fighting against myself The battle turned into a war, And I’m not afraid, I’m just worried Worried about being a warrior. I fight all day, my soul is tired But I don’t let myself rest when the time is best or when it expires The night falls but my heartbeat rises, Racing thoughts run circles in my head. My head, my bed. My brain is inside of my head. My head is part of me. Aren’t we all just a brain in a cage? Tonight the cage is electric, Nothing soothes the rage or stops the sizzling pain. I’m numb to the zap of the cold, hard metal. I want to lay in a field of sage, Lay me among the wildflowers. I’ve never seen blue sky or blinding light, At least not in the night. The moon shines, but not enough for me! This perfect creation isn’t bright enough for me! At least not in the night... I will lay my head when all this passes I’ll wander off to sleep And the next time I come to bed, It will just repeat.
0
Sep 16, 2020
Sep 16, 2020 at 12:40 AM UTC
the sun will rise and we will try again
Thoughts racing, trying to fill another page of this book with my story, sewing in new sheets of paper to build some space. Space between me and the page saying The End. Turning the pages, looking back at some from many years ago. I read about a little girl, happily exploring the world. She doesn't know about pain or despair. Just look at her glowing eyes. Progressing in the story, a few years later. I watch a little girl, crying, covered by the blanket. She doesn't want others to see, 'cause they'll just laugh anyway. In her home, she has no room. The whole house is filled with her father yelling. The whole house is filled with her mother crying. The only place for her sorrow is deep inside herself. Just look at her puffy eyes. Skipping a few chapters, years of searching and hoping. I hear a little girl, laughing loud. Nobody heard her screams when she needed them. At least, when she's being loud, they notice her. Being lost and out of control she hurts others. When they scold her, they look at her. Just look at her pleading eyes. Going through pages of her trying to understand what she's done. I hear a little girl swearing she'll never hurt anybody else. She'd rather hurt herself to cope with the severe cold of this world. So she builds a wall to keep everyone out, to trap the wrath inside. But she forgot the fear was already there. Just look at her empty eyes. Flipping the pages to read the ones from a few weeks ago. I see a little girl drowning in tears and self doubt. Apparently the wall she built long time ago is still standing strong. A lot of 'Wanted' posters are hung on it from both sides, but neither can reach through. Just look at her anxious eyes. I'm sitting here crying, hoping my tears will wash away the letters on these pages. But they won't. So I'll keep on sewing pages. Hoping one day I'll read the one about a girl who's come home. About a girl who tore down the wall, about a girl who built a place in a house to live in. Until then I hope to have enough strength to put space between me and the page saying The End.
0
Sep 4, 2020
Sep 4, 2020 at 9:28 AM UTC
Sewing Pages
Thoughts racing, trying to fill another page of this book with my story, sewing in new sheets of paper to build some space. Space between me and the page saying The End. Turning the pages, looking back at some from many years ago. I read about a little girl, happily exploring the world. She doesn't know about pain or despair. Just look at her glowing eyes. Progressing in the story, a few years later. I watch a little girl, crying, covered by the blanket. She doesn't want others to see, 'cause they'll just laugh anyway. In her home, she has no room. The whole house is filled with her father yelling. The whole house is filled with her mother crying. The only place for her sorrow is deep inside herself. Just look at her puffy eyes. Skipping a few chapters, years of searching and hoping. I hear a little girl, laughing loud. Nobody heard her screams when she needed them. At least, when she's being loud, they notice her. Being lost and out of control she hurts others. When they scold her, they look at her. Just look at her pleading eyes. Going through pages of her trying to understand what she's done. I hear a little girl swearing she'll never hurt anybody else. She'd rather hurt herself to cope with the severe cold of this world. So she builds a wall to keep everyone out, to trap the wrath inside. But she forgot the fear was already there. Just look at her empty eyes. Flipping the pages to read the ones from a few weeks ago. I see a little girl drowning in tears and self doubt. Apparently the wall she built long time ago is still standing strong. A lot of 'Wanted' posters are hung on it from both sides, but neither can reach through. Just look at her anxious eyes. I'm sitting here crying, hoping my tears will wash away the letters on these pages. But they won't. So I'll keep on sewing pages. Hoping one day I'll read the one about a girl who's come home. About a girl who tore down the wall, about a girl who built a place in a house to live in. Until then I hope to have enough strength to put space between me and the page saying The End.
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47
one, two, three, breathe one, two, three, breathe out it's all in my head that's what i keep reciting to myself it's all in my head but if it's all in my head why is my heart pounding so loud? it feels like it might just fall out
0
Jun 11, 2020
Jun 11, 2020 at 12:29 AM UTC
racing heart
Thoughts racing Frustration attacks Fearing what I do Have I done things wrong Falling to my knees I grip my head Pressing with all my might To try and stop it from destroying me Over analyzing Over thinking Emotions going out of control As I rock back and forth Is everything I do so wrong I can’t see how it’s not anymore The pain my head inflicts Driving me insane Where is the peace of mind Where is the harmony that I hear so much about Where is the love for myself Why must I be so broken I start to scream Trying to drown out the voices Blasting music so loud It can cause someone to go deaf Yet I still hear the thoughts Nagging my every move Telling me all these lies With so much negativity Things like You’ll never amount to anything You aren’t worth anyone’s time You annoy everyone you talk to You don’t deserve happiness You deserve this pain you’re in You don’t have a right to feel special You will never be enough They all hate you They find you repulsive They don’t care about you Why do you think they would ever love you All these things Everyday All day Breaking me apart bit by bit Pushing me further and further Into this pit of despair Driving me to think Maybe I’m better off alone Maybe I’m better off away from everyone Maybe I just annoy everyone I talk to Maybe I am intruding on the people I care about Maybe I’m not worth the air I breath Am I even worthy of being loved So many negative thoughts Drowning out my own voice Sending me into a state of disarray Crying myself to sleep Huddled in a corner Fearing to even be seen By those I call my family Why am I so broken Why must my head do this to me What is happening to me Do I even deserve to exist
0
Jun 9, 2020
Jun 9, 2020 at 5:07 PM UTC
Questioning My Worth
Thoughts racing Frustration attacks Fearing what I do Have I done things wrong Falling to my knees I grip my head Pressing with all my might To try and stop it from destroying me Over analyzing Over thinking Emotions going out of control As I rock back and forth Is everything I do so wrong I can’t see how it’s not anymore The pain my head inflicts Driving me insane Where is the peace of mind Where is the harmony that I hear so much about Where is the love for myself Why must I be so broken I start to scream Trying to drown out the voices Blasting music so loud It can cause someone to go deaf Yet I still hear the thoughts Nagging my every move Telling me all these lies With so much negativity Things like You’ll never amount to anything You aren’t worth anyone’s time You annoy everyone you talk to You don’t deserve happiness You deserve this pain you’re in You don’t have a right to feel special You will never be enough They all hate you They find you repulsive They don’t care about you Why do you think they would ever love you All these things Everyday All day Breaking me apart bit by bit Pushing me further and further Into this pit of despair Driving me to think Maybe I’m better off alone Maybe I’m better off away from everyone Maybe I just annoy everyone I talk to Maybe I am intruding on the people I care about Maybe I’m not worth the air I breath Am I even worthy of being loved So many negative thoughts Drowning out my own voice Sending me into a state of disarray Crying myself to sleep Huddled in a corner Fearing to even be seen By those I call my family Why am I so broken Why must my head do this to me What is happening to me Do I even deserve to exist
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64
his fingers fidgeted with the stars comets flying like racing cars when he glanced above, all he hoped to sing a lullaby to the one he loves the most
0
Apr 27, 2020
Apr 27, 2020 at 11:59 AM UTC
racing cars