#postman
A pensioner's long walk today,
Yes, the mailman's been, no yah!
What bills did arrive this way?
Postman, postman, stay away,
I am putting up a sign,
"BAN THE BILLS!' about frigging time!
If all bill payers went on strike,
Bills would go down, not upwards hike,
Yes, it's that dreaded long walk again,
Should I throw the bills down the drain?
A gutter too far, or in the bin?
Bringing us bills is the postman's great sin,
Can't afford that, can't afford that,
"I'll shoot you, postman, now don't come back!"
Is shooting postmen a capital offence?
"BAN THE BILLS!" on everyone's fence!
Sep 14, 2019
Sep 14, 2019 at 5:01 PM UTC
I once robbed a post-box,
& looked through letters, small & scented.
Of someone's aunt with chickenpox,
And bills handsome, from the rented.
Love letters, I had to read!
Which in boredom, my mind would feed.
Some which made my heart bleed,
An urge to send, a nervous need.
A good doctor's prescription pill,
& injections, with dread did me fill.
Thankfully illegible, so not my joy to ****
But now, I must stop,
For reasons purely confidential.
As I catch the Postmans' beaming top,
His light bag filled only with what's essential!
Sep 24, 2018
Sep 24, 2018 at 7:53 AM UTC
Postman, postman, stay away,
Do not bring me bills this way,
Take them to the Prime Minister today,
He can afford them, let's say,
Postman, postman, bills here do not purvey,
Postman, postman, stay away!
Mar 20, 2017
Mar 20, 2017 at 1:57 AM UTC
There was a time
when I waited every morning to hear the
soft pitter-patter of your feet,
hurried, like a scurrying fox in my
back garden, just this time by my own front gates.
There was a time
when I stood by the door every morning,
yearning to see your smile and hear your whisper of a
'Good day' promise to me, to accidently
drop the box you softly put in my hands so that you can
pick it up for me. Aren't I sneaky.
Dec 8, 2015
Dec 8, 2015 at 12:23 PM UTC
The postman boy
Has gotten weary of the stories told
Wrongly by dear Oblivia on the yards
Every morning.
The postman boy comes for
The warm-hearted letters of distance sons
But on his hands are letters of slander and
coalition he did not fathom.
Apr 26, 2015
Apr 26, 2015 at 10:36 AM UTC
I didn't get mail today,
The postman didn't call,
No letter box rattling,
No letters in the hall,
No dinner reservations,
No flights to Istanbul,
No romantic entanglement,
Valentine's day’s so cruel.
Feb 14, 2015
Feb 14, 2015 at 5:11 PM UTC
In his monochrome home
Postman Pat
Has a black and white television
To colour co-ordinate
With his black and white cat.
As well as
Secret love children
Who also match.
He christened them all Foam.
As befits an autodictat
With a comprehensive
Collection of
Black and white combs
Apr 18, 2014
Apr 18, 2014 at 6:37 PM UTC