#panickattackpoems - Hello Poetry

Why would you do that why would you say you trust me and then fall on my sword, burying the cold steel to the hilt in your warm flesh. Maybe you trust me, but I don't think I ever can trust myself again with you.

0

Jan 29, 2014

Jan 29, 2014 at 3:12 PM UTC

amazinglybadidea

trust

Why would you do that why would you say you trust me and then fall on my sword, burying the cold steel to the hilt in your warm flesh. Maybe you trust me, but I don't think I ever can trust myself again with you.

12

Why would you ever willingly run into the guilded trap my words construct. You know their power, you know their sting, you know the way they will pierce your armor. I cannot protect you the way I want to, but please don't go killing yourself on account of me.

0

Jan 29, 2014

Jan 29, 2014 at 3:08 PM UTC

amazinglybadidea

gilded (trap)

Why would you ever willingly run into the guilded trap my words construct. You know their power, you know their sting, you know the way they will pierce your armor. I cannot protect you the way I want to, but please don't go killing yourself on account of me.

8

And as the bombshells of my daily fears explode they hurtle into me with the exact force of her fists and leave bruises, invisible (this time) and knock me down until I am drowning under the waves and I can't breathe under the weight of all these memories because as the bombshells of my daily fears explode I know how to trace them right back to my youth and I am scared of still being young.

0

Jan 15, 2014

Jan 15, 2014 at 2:13 PM UTC

amazinglybadidea

Still Young

And as the bombshells of my daily fears explode they hurtle into me with the exact force of her fists and leave bruises, invisible (this time) and knock me down until I am drowning under the waves and I can't breathe under the weight of all these memories because as the bombshells of my daily fears explode I know how to trace them right back to my youth and I am scared of still being young.

18

Years later, after you think you've outrun all your past fears, you will find yourself sitting on the edge of your bed, unable to stand up and face the world. It's been years since it happened, since she last exploded and you let yourself come close enough to feel her shrapnel burn through you, but still you're huddled on the edge of your bed, scribbling desperate, terrified words into your notebook unable to go downstairs because she is still there.

0

Jan 15, 2014

Jan 15, 2014 at 2:10 PM UTC

amazinglybadidea

consequences

Years later, after you think you've outrun all your past fears, you will find yourself sitting on the edge of your bed, unable to stand up and face the world. It's been years since it happened, since she last exploded and you let yourself come close enough to feel her shrapnel burn through you, but still you're huddled on the edge of your bed, scribbling desperate, terrified words into your notebook unable to go downstairs because she is still there.

15

Is this it, is this the final sign that I am damaged beyond repair? Not only am I now scared of her blows, I'm sitting frozen in the middle of all the what-ifs. These cuts you riddled me with in great swathes of pain, aren't healed as I thought they were, they are now bleeding and stinging me years later. Learning that you are so much weaker than you thought and so much more broken makes you ask whether you will ever be whole.

0

Jan 15, 2014

Jan 15, 2014 at 2:15 PM UTC

amazinglybadidea

Aftershock

Is this it, is this the final sign that I am damaged beyond repair? Not only am I now scared of her blows, I'm sitting frozen in the middle of all the what-ifs. These cuts you riddled me with in great swathes of pain, aren't healed as I thought they were, they are now bleeding and stinging me years later. Learning that you are so much weaker than you thought and so much more broken makes you ask whether you will ever be whole.

18