#notapoem
I have never felt more lonely
Then in a room full of people
Jan 24
Jan 24, 2026 at 1:38 PM UTC
nyone want to be friends? i swear im really cool. age isn't important but id rather it be relatively close to being a minor. if ur interested, u can shoot me a message and i'll reply asap! :)
Sep 6, 2025
Sep 6, 2025 at 11:08 PM UTC
Lately, I’ve been feeling a little light headed. No, I’m okay. I don’t have a condition or anything. I just feel like my world is slowly collapsing. Every time I try to fix things and somehow getting good, the universe will do a huge clap back and smack me in the face.
Lately, I’ve been feeling a little useless. Just when I thought I’m doing an excellent job at work, it came to a point that they have to let me go because of personal issues and choices. “You’re good but...” There’s always a but. But should be my middle name in other lifetime. It suits me well.
Lately, I’ve been feeling very insecure. My girlfriend loves me, I know that. But sometimes I feel like she can’t express so much of a feeling like how she used to express it to her ex-girlfriend. When we started dating, I stalked my girlfriend for fun and I saw posts and letters and all that kind of crap how she loves her and how every single second is important when talking to her. She even right the call details in a ******* notebook with all the hearts and smileys and all cheesiness. Me, on the other hand, being mad at for being demanding for asking more phone calls. (she’s working milessss away, btw).
Lately, I’ve been feeling a little betrayed. My mother, who is supposed to keep me safe and warm based on the world’s rule, messed with my life. She placed me in a very difficult position and now people are hunting me away. My cousins, who are my very best friends as well, turned their backs on me because of what my mother did. They even back stab me during dinners that I’m not around. Referring to me as “she’s like her mom”
Lately, I’ve been feeling… Lost. I have nobody to turn to. I have nothing to do. I always tell myself to “Focus on what I can control. But now… I don’t have control about anything anymore.
Jul 6, 2021
Jul 6, 2021 at 9:19 PM UTC
It was today when I realized. . . I "actually" realized, how unpredictable life is. How you could leave behind your loved ones, incomplete dreams and life that someone dreams of, in the fist of life and step in the darkness of death.
Death petrifies me. Because, while the people who dearly love you and the people who are expecting to be saved by you, suffer with unbearable pain of your loss, you will feel nothing; no sadness, no happiness, just numb. That just feels self-centered even if it is not one's fault.
Perhaps, death is not as dark as we say it is.
What if, death is tranquil. A place were you can't feel anything, but peaceful. Away from you happiness and worries, cradling in serenity...
Jun 16, 2021
Jun 16, 2021 at 2:18 PM UTC
A blank sheet of paper loses it’s beauty
Once it’s been written upon
After which it’s worth
is decided by the ink smeared upon it
Our society talks about equality
And values the beauty of limitless possibilities
but judges something
As soon as it is quantified
In beauty, price and usefulness
An equal world is one
Where a blank sheet
And a masterpiece
Hold the same value
For they’re both beautiful in their own way
Aug 2, 2020
Aug 2, 2020 at 4:50 PM UTC
Last year’s leaves incapacitated in an icy grave..
Burly cattails poking up through the surface of the icy lake.
With my back on the dock my feet resting comfortably
on the bright reflective white ice, from here I write.
The air temperature at 40 Fahrenheit seems like summer,
I soak up the beautiful rays while fumbling with my device.
Two Canadian snow geese fly over honking
catching my dog and my attention, our eyes follow their flight.
Green, grey and brown quacking mallards swim along the melted shore line, it's mating time.
Puffy black squirrels hopping from tree to tree a jungle gym
high above in the forest canape. Over. way over on the other side of the lake I see deer near the shore line. I try to bring them to my dogs nearsighted attention but only my human eye can see.
Today the world looks beautiful from these poetic eyes.
Mar 23, 2020
Mar 23, 2020 at 10:27 AM UTC
I really have to stop eating
Doritos and Diet Coke
for breakfast
*
May 13, 2019
May 13, 2019 at 6:58 AM UTC
I don’t believe in the term I love you more.
It’s either you do [love] or you don’t.
We will not be able to quantify or qualify this feeling.
All things are possible when love lives in our hearts.
Impossible dissipates into the ether.
[I think] that’s just me.
Feb 17, 2019
Feb 17, 2019 at 10:07 AM UTC
i like to think of goddesses.
they're pretty cool if you ask me.
i'm obsessed with three main ones in particular:
nyx- goddess of the night.
selene- goddess of the moon.
asteria- goddess of the stars.
and yes, they are from Greek 'mythology'.
but i don't see anything mythological about them.
so maybe you might think that Asteria riding across the sky with a chariot of the moon is a little, unusual.
and maybe you think that it's weird how there are different beings controlling different things.
perhaps it's the idea that history has told you that all of this ideology is made up.
and you can think that.
but i don't want to.
because i find safety in the fact that i have my full devotion in several beings, all taking charge of all aspects of my life.
it's quite liberating actually.
Nov 12, 2018
Nov 12, 2018 at 3:19 PM UTC
love is not what love is or what love used to be
love grows. and love grew inside of me for the very first time.
true love that is, love that i thought would never exist except in movies or my favorite romance novels.
imagine falling in love with your best friend, unknowingly.
days pass you by and the sun shines on a sun-kissed face,
embracing all of life beauties. without knowing you fell for love of everything.
love of life, the trees, the universe, people and those who inhabit your life.
every small thing became big, within reach was possibility.
for new chances, changes, and that's when it hit you.
HARD.
like a brick, like bricks, like the titanic came and sunk on your heart , on your whole body even
in the most angelic way, your heart was full of life, of peace, unity of the most purest form of love.
seeing their face for the first time after that was mesmerizing.
tiny butterflies filled your stomach, any chance to talk to , to be in their presence, fighting the urge to jump into a full of *** rage.
blood running warm between your veins , melting away deep inside your body.
if only they could notice you...
until the end, is where this story gets better.
perhaps , a fairy tale ending is in store for you, or perhaps the best is saved for last.
perhaps, a few exchanged glances, a small grin at your jokes, a simple brush against the arm, leaves an open discussion of flirtation.
fluttering of the hearts , engaging in more than a friendship, but an assurance.
completely lost from the start, we somehow found ourselves tangled deep into the web of mystery.
so,
when we reach the end, remember it is also the beginning of a love so true,
reciprocating feelings deep inside, where both parties can know longer hide it.
to fight the urge to not love, is torture in the deepest form.
love is what love was, and love grows into something more.
love grew into my soulmate.
with love,
a soul.
Aug 25, 2018
Aug 25, 2018 at 4:37 PM UTC
Oh my God, I did it! AAAAHHHH!
I actually have 102 followers!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
I can't thank everyone here enough!
I started this page last year because I felt
like I needed an outlet for how I was feeling.
It was such a low place to be...
Things now are somewhat better,
but life as you know is up and down
To know that HP is such a positive and
supportive platform means so much to me.
Especially because I do have anxiety
as well as depression.
I usually feel very VERY
low about myself. Writing was and always will
be a way for me to cope - even though I do have
a love-hate relationship with it, but I digress.
This platform has made me truly believe more
in the writing craft. When it comes to art and expression,
I feel like I truly can be myself. It's a ray of light in
my life that I'm starting to believe in.
So much so that I've got a project lined up!
I'm working on my first poetry collection.
There's still alot of details to work out, but
I will let you know as I go.
I've now opened a Twitter account so you're
welcome to follow me! I'll try to be active on there as
much as I can.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you all!
I'm super grateful for all of you.
Let us continue to grow as artists.
I love all of you.
Lyn ***
Jun 26, 2018
Jun 26, 2018 at 10:44 AM UTC
I really dont know how to put what I'm about to say in a way that sounds like poetry without leaving stuff out and I think this is an important issue that must not be left to interpretation of the reader (like poetry does).
I wrote a poem almost a year ago (its down here somewhere) about a friend that commited suicide (I will call him R from now on) and even though I still think about him constantly this past week he's been more in my mind, I dreamed about him last week and woke up in tears and then I heard about Kate ***** and Anthony Bourdain, I talked to some friends and they were thinking more about him these past days sooo.... background story.
I'm a doctor, I'm a resident. I'm lucky enough to say I have a lot a good friends some of them are my med school classmates, R was one of them.
After graduation we all pursued doing a residency and thankfully we all got into what we wanted, most of my friends, including R, got to stay in the same city we all studied together, which was nice because most of their families lived there and they didnt have to pay rent and stuff like that.
A few months before the residency program began R called me and said the most shocking thing, he confessed to me that he had been diagnosed with depression during our third year in med school and that he was doing well enough that his psychiatrist considered he didnt need medication anymore, but was going to keep an eye on him in case he needed them again, he had been off the medication for 8 months by the time he called me and this were his exact words after he said all that to me "I know I'm not okay, and I know this because I have everything I ever wanted, I have friends that I love, I have an amazing family, I have the career that I want, I got accepted into the program I worked so hard for and still I think it would be better to die, and it scares me a lot" I talked to him until his mom got home so I knew he was safe, the doctor gave him medication again and he was good to go. Two years passed and then he decided he wanted to go into Neurology and he got accepted into the most important hospital in the country, that was in another city so that meant he had to live on his own for the first time in his life, and get another doctor there, I called to congratulate him a week before he left, that was on February, we made plans to see each other in July.... he died in May.
Why do I think this is important?
1. My friend didn't look sad, he was always smiling, he gave the warmest, longest hugs and when he told me he was sick I was shocked that he had been going through this for three years without anyone noticing.
2. He was very aware of his disease and he knew he had a lot to be happy about. So this proves that it can happen to anyone and is not about feeling sad for a certain situation, like getting bad grades or having a breakup. Its not something you fix by "focusing on the good things".
3. Another friend was feeling weird and she told me she was trying to "shake those feelings off" until he remembered R and decided it was best to seek for help, she was diagnosed with anxiety and started getting treatment.
4. Another one told us he was feeling very bad, like if he was not being himself, and that he was thinking about going to a psychiatrist, because he was scared of going through what R went.
5. I miss R everyday and he left a huge hole to fill, and there are so many things that remind me of him and that I wish I was able to tell him right know but at least he opened the eyes of the ones that were close to him and made a few of us do and internal check up and actually pushed others to get help.
My message for you who read this is dont be ashamed of asking for help and dont make others feel ashamed, encourage people to know that the mind gets sick too, just like the heart, and the stomach and any other ***** in your body. R knew people loved him, R knew he was lucky to have the life he had and still his mind and his depression made him think it was not worth it to keep on living.
Jun 11, 2018
Jun 11, 2018 at 2:17 AM UTC
The moon asked him a question
In which the sun replied...
"Why are you staring at me?"
Said the moon.
"He's looking at me.
You just stole my light."
And sun took back her brightness
So he then tripped and fell
In the black of the night.
"Why can't you still look at me?"
Asked the Sun.
And he answered:
"You're just far too bright."
Apr 19, 2018
Apr 19, 2018 at 6:32 AM UTC
My mommy made a promise when I was young. She told me that she’d do everything to protect me, that she’d do everything to keep me safe. She swore with all her heart and strength that she’d fight for me with all her life.
She did fight with her best.
She fought with her all.
She gave it all she’s got.
She did manage to push back all my tears just before they would fall; sometimes they even climb back to hiding behind when she smiles. Even sobs turn to laughter at her presence.
Heck, I never felt down. She kept keeping me up.
She fought the winning fight. Beaten away sadness, and boxed out regret, she made shame feel sorry. I never even knew doubt, of course because I was sure she was there for me.
I never knew any counter weapon that could ever out power her smile, or her hugs or her forehead kisses –nothing could ever beat her forehead kisses.
She won ‘til the very end.
Then she lost.
I guess it’s kind of too ironic now. I hated it with all my heart before.
I hated the fact that when my protector disappeared, I was left bare for every new stranger, sadness… regret… shame… doubt…
All the tears that she kept pushing back, they finally escaped.
I didn’t even have any idea before that there’s this pool of raining kept up at the surface of my wrists just waiting to be freed—
I hated her.
I hated her for always winning.
I hated her for always trying so hard.
I hated her for fighting—
Ironic is it not? Now here I am making that same promise to you.
Seeing you cry so much, so devilishly much, I couldn’t really help it. I couldn’t help but remember all the times I cried without my mommy smiling to hush me; I couldn’t help but recall all the tears that fell from my eyes then, how I waited, crying, how I prayed crying, how I foolishly tried to fake all my smiles for the first few months, still crying… Just vainly waiting for her to stop my tears from falling.
I couldn’t help but stop it.
It was all that I could do. It was the best that I can do.
“Cross my heart and hope to die.”
I swear that I’d do everything to protect you. I’ll do everything to keep you safe. I swear with all my heart and soul that I’d fight for you with all my life.
And, my son, I’ll never leave you alone.
I’ll never let another tear pass through your eyelids again, neither will I let another sob from your throat, no, now you’re with me, I won’t let this leukemia I passed along hurt you anymore.
This is the only thing she taught me to do.
Smile.
Hug.
Kiss your forehead.
At least I fought— How I hugged you managed to muffle the deafening beep of your oscillator…
I fought with everything I had.
I fought with all my heart and my strength like my mommy did.
I kept all the tears back inside your eyelids just when they are about to fall. Not even a single drop of blood escaped your wrists too. I think I was able to push back all the shame and regret and doubts in your heart? I hope I did.
I won against fear, at least. I managed to see you smile one last time but—
—I fought ‘til the very end—
Then I lost.
Apr 18, 2018
Apr 18, 2018 at 11:16 AM UTC
i went to pour hot
water into my
mug but i was looking for something else
and i missed you
but i could have sworn you were right
here a second
ago i guess it’s one
of those
you had to be there moments
you should have been there moments
i thought you would be there moments
why weren’t you there?
moments haha like
going to a party to see a single
person who turns out
not to be single at all or
that time i reached for your
love and there was a hole
in my pocket
i can’t even remember where we fell
out in the first place
Mar 4, 2018
Mar 4, 2018 at 5:03 AM UTC
You will wonder why your chest feels so tight whenever her name rolls over his tongue. Not me, but the other one.
The one who will always have a place in his heart.
Don't give up yet,
but listen to every story of them.
It will break you for sure, but you will know how once he loved someone that much.
You will find yourself think about him continually.
When you walk alone on the street,
when you are with your friends talking about life,
or simply when you wash your dishes.
You will think about him
in any places
in any situations
The thoughts of him will make your stomach churns,
like you've been riding a roller coaster for so long
Sometimes the excitement will put you on the top of the world
but then reality will take you down,
twist you around,
and flip you over.
Again. Don't give up yet.
Bring him muffin or take him out to have fudge brownie ice cream on the weekend. Those are his favorites.
Remind him to not sleep late because he will get tired and grumpy in the morning,
tell him it is okay not to be perfect all the time,
and the most important thing
be there for him when he is unhappy with his life or when the memories of her keep crashing back to him.
You might prepare a band aid for gashes that will be left in your heart.
But please don't give up yet.
May 7, 2017
May 7, 2017 at 7:52 PM UTC
Instagram made me realize just how many fish there are in the sea
You always hear the saying but never believe it's truth within the heat of the moment. The question is, is this good or is this bad?
When you realize just how many beautiful people there it assures you, for a moment at least. That mr right or mrs right is out there and my are they beautiful. I see her now perfect from her lips to her nips. From her hair to the way she promptly sits in her chair. But something else happens, it shoots at your own ego and kills your self assurance. You start to think well maybe I'm not as hot as I think I am. How could I ever be with any of these people. Or worse, I don't like her because the women in front of me can't conspire to the women I see on Instagram, photoshopped to the waist, spray tanned out, teeth artificially whitened, makeup two inches thick and beyond reality. And we're caught, trying to play beautiful and trying to chase beautiful... I don't know it confuses me and makes me mad. I just hope to find someone real and someone more beautiful on the inside than they are on the out - as cliché as that sounds. But really it's something Instagram can't show. Which is why I should probably delete Instagram.
Mar 23, 2017
Mar 23, 2017 at 11:01 PM UTC