#nihilistic
Look at you, look at your routines.
You wake up with a mask that fits tight around your face
Because you know it won’t fit,
But yet you still have it tug at your mouth,
Forever pretending to smile through it.
As you walk out and into the sea of unfamiliar faces that fit the same mask,
You chase even the smallest amount of dopamine to distract yourself, Thinking you’re some main character to a story.
It’s almost cute to see.
But exhausting at the same time.
I used to be the same. I used to think the walls were solid and the sky was absolute.
And that feeling of love or hatred actually meant something.
But once you pull the string, the whole tapestry unravels,
Showing a bare wooden wall.
And to think that this thread held everything just for nothing to be behind it is quite sad.
But what can a powerless, wet, meat sack do about it?
No matter if you tear your vocal cords out screaming into the infinite and cold universe,
You won’t get a call back.
It won’t care if you win, lose, love or die.
You build a whole world around rules and morals just to distract yourself from the truth none want to face because you know your knees will buckle and you will try to say it isn’t true.
But you know in the marrow of your bones that it is true.
Nothing is holding this together.
You are something that decided it and everything around it had worth.
I tried to see what you saw in being you.
The structure, morals, and rules, it's all nothing in the works of the unforgiving universe.
I tried to understand and care, but how do you love a species that clings so desperately to its own illusions?
You don’t want freedom, you want comfort.
For all I care, go scream your problems out into the universe until your throat bleeds, cry over unsaid words, play out the rest of the script.
But remember, while you drown in the world you made,
I am the one sitting outside the frame.
And I am the only one who knows it’s all just silence waiting to happen.
-Immi
May 22
May 22, 2026 at 11:05 PM UTC
in time alone
we grew relentless,
sleepless, piecing together dream theories
on why life must slumber
and dreams conquer
you
who tried to resurrect dead moons and stars
who looked at the sun in his face
who shed feathers from your loneliness
who pierced your own wings and fell
like comets kissing earth, stuff of dreams and religions
golden staples
you liked your tea minimally sweet
and painted colors underneath your dark circles
primitive, of earth, your deification rite
divine
darkness churning on, you saw a feminine shape
drawing back a youthful veil,
a thousand pairs of eyes peered into a couple thousand years of
void
iridescent
marble gaze, beautiful and alien
colorless, but for a splash of red
lips that held the universe in a needle-like balance
sweet as a ripe fruit drooling
barred
the galleries of your mind
ever so gentle,
the midnight raven tore at the dove’s throat
visions of an apocalypse we idly gamble on
you
who never came back
who went on a path of dark suits and diamonds
soared through milky ways and emerged from afternoon foliage
lost your way, circled back
and gone
May 15, 2024
May 15, 2024 at 1:31 AM UTC
It was always pointless,
I was just naive.
You were a disappointment:
The ways you lied to me.
Moist and runny
Loose lipped, ******
Once this host has died, latch
Onto a new body.
Entwined-
Somebody, stop me.
Everything I say, I never believe.
Every phrase and action
Nothing
Aug 24, 2023
Aug 24, 2023 at 4:03 PM UTC
What fresh invention,
Breaking with convention;
To press down with anger,
And drive firm with depression.
Comfort in the arms, of a
Thorny ex. Bathed in attention.
A hopeless obsession- the silenced
Tongue wags,
In this quiet procession.
Aug 2, 2023
Aug 2, 2023 at 4:48 PM UTC
Continuity and infinity,
Why they have to be
Is beyond me.
The end of all things, I
Wish I were lucky enough to see.
But more than that,
I wish I were free.
Jul 21, 2023
Jul 21, 2023 at 9:24 AM UTC
Everyday it seems, more of the same:
Some kind of sick & twisted head game.
And to what selfish end, I can
Only assume it, to be
In the aim of amusement.
Kicks for you,
Joke on me
Jun 22, 2023
Jun 22, 2023 at 5:52 PM UTC
Render me living,
I have walked too long
With lurid eyes of sunken white.
My hollow heart, empty veins,
A shade of black, within me:
Colors dark as night.
And the flame I have been kindling,
It too, appears
To want to die
Jun 21, 2023
Jun 21, 2023 at 12:42 PM UTC
I'm not looking just to use someone.
Or be used.
I want a partner.
If that's asking too much,
Pass along the news.
Jun 19, 2023
Jun 19, 2023 at 11:23 PM UTC
I know when to be persistent,
I know when to stop trying.
I'll quit my ********
Stop my "crying."
:)
Jun 19, 2023
Jun 19, 2023 at 10:57 PM UTC
Stupidity is
A harsh buzz,
In a world of malice
And judgements.
Worse off are the wise,
For to use your eyes
Is to see that
Everyone is blind.
Jun 12, 2023
Jun 12, 2023 at 11:44 PM UTC
bury me living
for i am in a world of dead
where the zombified stumble around
looking for meaning
maybe it'll make more sense
six feet under
and down the river styx
tie me to a raft
and let me drift
far, from this meaningless charade
known as life
Jan 23, 2021
Jan 23, 2021 at 1:11 PM UTC
women don't know how to love
and neither do men
it's a mean world
it's a cold one
full of children
who've got the bends,
coming up too fast
Jan 15, 2021
Jan 15, 2021 at 3:02 AM UTC
welcome to the hollow cake
buttered by cream frosting
its no fun being the rat in wax
is it?
was the garnish good, at least?
we're here only moments
and they're being wasted every minute
just like all the opportunities
that have gone on by
there's still plenty game to be had
a plentiful lot in play
pennies for each of their fads
hair changes, and ripped stockings
handmade
but when the dye fades
your mascara runs
was it fun?
Jan 13, 2021
Jan 13, 2021 at 6:21 PM UTC
to the silences that bother you
the pauses which seem to have no end
dragging on to eternity
to your shortness
and the quickness with which you act
it's really stupid
i'm in love with the idea
of seeing how you end
Jan 13, 2021
Jan 13, 2021 at 11:06 AM UTC
the stoneman has a heart
its just hidden under rock;
jack frost is cool
but his is a warm touch
despite him seeming icy
the "hideous freaks and dregs"
dredged up from "impropriety"
shoeshine and maitre d
they are well mannered,
some might make one die it seems,
they say being kind can be murdering
is it true for the murderee?
Jan 12, 2021
Jan 12, 2021 at 11:58 PM UTC
it's definitely my fault
the doubt of that is none
next time, i'll obviously act on them differently
next time though, i'll feel different
you have layers unending
so for you to not feel this as i do
is understandable
but for you to not try and understand
is regrettable
because i'm trying
admittedly, harder than anything else
guess that's why i'm struggling
Jan 12, 2021
Jan 12, 2021 at 10:24 PM UTC
none of you are strong
or independent
how many do you rely on for your food?
your gas? electric, and the roof overhead?
this is a fixed system
a racetrack
where all the horses are doped
all i can say is,
stop running
Jan 12, 2021
Jan 12, 2021 at 10:05 PM UTC
there's no need to be alone
so long as someone wants you
no reason to be sad
so long as there's happiness to be had
not for you
not a need to be afraid
unless you live with your fears
one track one line, a straightaway
only left to shift the gears
not for you
this machine
this marvel of a beast
a prize itself
but not for you
Jan 12, 2021
Jan 12, 2021 at 9:37 PM UTC
we stood tall;
free and unabridged
a testament to our youths
but when they called us down
we stayed standing
our height shrunk
wrinkles worn on torn porcelain
a graying of old stone
we grew fatter off decadent fruit
while caged animal fed on imprisoned others
and the minority was culled to a head
in internment camps
in privatized prisons
in the courts
and the legislator's building
in the very creation of the nation
stillborn at conception
an aborted fetus carried to term
delivered, to be chucked to the wayside
weened off the milk of a tormenting yearn
to make, to build, to think, and learn
but we stifle that now
in favor of rockets to fly
leaning toward oil to burn
will there be a scream when we die
or will this silence hold firm?
Dec 31, 2020
Dec 31, 2020 at 12:33 PM UTC
i can barely keep my eyes opening
listening to everyone whine about inane ****
that they'll do really nothing to change
are you really going to quit vaping?
really?
stop your drinking?
finally get "in-shape?"
what's this years resolution?
guess what man, i don't ******* care
keep it to yourself, i could give a ****
do something for others
selfish *****
Dec 31, 2020
Dec 31, 2020 at 2:29 AM UTC
this species
that has done so much for itself,
has done so much to itself
and offered so little
is it worth this all?
the planet and it's treasures
galapagos and great reefs
swamps, bulging with reeds
the birds, the trees, the bees
african sahara,
the amazon's green green leaves
would you believe it
that it is?
we will pay tenfold
with hindsight 20^∞
looking back in regret
but with a bittersweet affinity
Dec 27, 2020
Dec 27, 2020 at 10:52 PM UTC
reading words, of hues emery
darkening shades of the fastly falling frenzy
awash with the world
haunted by the memories
of those things here and gone,
still the jabs come,
by no tangible entity
iridescent burning out
wellspring of love
running dry to match the mouth
of one mighty
Huascarán
Dec 10, 2020
Dec 10, 2020 at 1:52 AM UTC
he stopped me, a little further ahead of him
on the sidewalk
he said
"I've lived this life before"
"and?" i asked
he just looked at me and walked along
Nov 24, 2020
Nov 24, 2020 at 10:35 PM UTC
that we may fall
to arms
blades sharpened
on the grindstone of hate
atlas stands
shouldering the weight
that their words
were willed to do wicked deeds
he weeps
at the long suffering
at length and still here
Nov 24, 2020
Nov 24, 2020 at 10:30 PM UTC