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#mentalhealthstruggles
Pills and pills slide down my throat, it’s for my safety, I suppose. But maybe it isn’t, maybe pills and pills slide down my throat and it’s for their safety, for the people around me. Because when pills and pills slide down my throat, they don’t have to see me suffer. But if pills and pills slide down my throat and it’s all for them, what does that mean for me? As for I will still suffer. Even though pills and pills slide down my throat, I will still feel the consequences, the lack of energy, the dark thoughts. You know, they said that when pills and pills slide down my throat things would be better, feel better. And even though pills and pills slide down my throat, I don’t feel better and things have certainly taken a turn for the worse. I didn’t feel so bad and things weren’t so terrible before pills— all those pills and pills sliding down my throat. But if I take those pills and pills away, will I feel better or do I just need more of those pills and pills sliding down my throat? Messing with my body, more consequences every time. Oh those pills and pills sliding down my throat, supposed to make me better. But what are they really for, those pills and pills sliding down my throat, cause they really don’t seem to do the job they have been assigned. So there they come, more pills and pills slide down my throat, just in the tiny sliver of hope that these will help, solve my problem. So that I’ll eventually have less pills and pills sliding down my throat.
0
Nov 21, 2025
Nov 21, 2025 at 10:34 AM UTC
Raelynn
Pills and Pills
Pills and pills slide down my throat, it’s for my safety, I suppose. But maybe it isn’t, maybe pills and pills slide down my throat and it’s for their safety, for the people around me. Because when pills and pills slide down my throat, they don’t have to see me suffer. But if pills and pills slide down my throat and it’s all for them, what does that mean for me? As for I will still suffer. Even though pills and pills slide down my throat, I will still feel the consequences, the lack of energy, the dark thoughts. You know, they said that when pills and pills slide down my throat things would be better, feel better. And even though pills and pills slide down my throat, I don’t feel better and things have certainly taken a turn for the worse. I didn’t feel so bad and things weren’t so terrible before pills— all those pills and pills sliding down my throat. But if I take those pills and pills away, will I feel better or do I just need more of those pills and pills sliding down my throat? Messing with my body, more consequences every time. Oh those pills and pills sliding down my throat, supposed to make me better. But what are they really for, those pills and pills sliding down my throat, cause they really don’t seem to do the job they have been assigned. So there they come, more pills and pills slide down my throat, just in the tiny sliver of hope that these will help, solve my problem. So that I’ll eventually have less pills and pills sliding down my throat.
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7
I’m hiding, Yes, I’m hiding, Been locked in here for twenty, maybe more, Trying to fix the mess that I carry to the core. Everyone’s in the living room, Laughing, dancing to some happy tune. But me? I’m stuck in this silent space, A crowded house, but I’m lost in my own place. I’m trapped in this maze, my mind’s own maze, A prisoner of these long, lonely days. Silent screams that no one hears, Louder than the laughter just beyond here. I’m here, but I’m gone, present but erased, A crowded house, but I’ve lost my place. They’ve shown me love, or so they claim, But behind my back, I hear my name. Whispers slither like snakes through the cracks, I know they act, just keeping me intact. They smile wide, but their eyes are dry, Maybe they care, or they don’t—but it’s all a lie. Knock Knock “Hey, you alright?” “Erm, I’ll be out soon, give me a sec, it’s alright…” But is it really? ‘Cause I’m tired, truly tired, Of fighting fires and battling demons dancing in my head, Of faking smiles when I feel dead. Every relationship falls like the one before, Each one shattered my heart like glass. I’ve given all, there’s nothing left to give, Now, I just exist, but don’t know how to live. They think I’m fine, that I’m still the same, The happy boy, the bright-eyed flame. The one who danced, who laughed, who shone, Who carried the weight of the world like it was his own. But the truth is, now, I’m shattered, split, and splintered, Like a mirror that has been dropped, And every time I pick it up, the pieces never lock. Once a sunbeam, now just smoke, A fading laugh, a forgotten joke. See, I used to be the boy who bubbled with joy, Now I’m the man that misery employs. I’m the punchline to jokes never told, I’m the shadow that hides in the bold. I used to shine, used to soar, Now I’m just trying to survive the war. Bright smiles buried beneath the grime, The clock keeps ticking, but I’m out of time. They’re waiting for me to come cut the cake, But how can I slice when it’s all just fake? I’m hiding in here, plotting an escape, Maybe I’ll slip through that window, leave no trace, Run to a place I’ve never known, But even there, this weight’s my own. What do I want? I don’t even know, Love? Maybe? But trust? It won’t grow. It’s like carrying mountains on my back, All this baggage from scars. Knock Knock “You coming out?” Yeah… I guess I’ll go out. Put on the smiley mask. Open the door, And I shout— “Heeeyyyy! Let’s turn it up, let’s shout!” They cheer, they dance, think I’m alright, But in this mask, I’m not here.
0
Oct 22, 2024
Oct 22, 2024 at 10:16 PM UTC
slydosted
Hiding
I’m hiding, Yes, I’m hiding, Been locked in here for twenty, maybe more, Trying to fix the mess that I carry to the core. Everyone’s in the living room, Laughing, dancing to some happy tune. But me? I’m stuck in this silent space, A crowded house, but I’m lost in my own place. I’m trapped in this maze, my mind’s own maze, A prisoner of these long, lonely days. Silent screams that no one hears, Louder than the laughter just beyond here. I’m here, but I’m gone, present but erased, A crowded house, but I’ve lost my place. They’ve shown me love, or so they claim, But behind my back, I hear my name. Whispers slither like snakes through the cracks, I know they act, just keeping me intact. They smile wide, but their eyes are dry, Maybe they care, or they don’t—but it’s all a lie. Knock Knock “Hey, you alright?” “Erm, I’ll be out soon, give me a sec, it’s alright…” But is it really? ‘Cause I’m tired, truly tired, Of fighting fires and battling demons dancing in my head, Of faking smiles when I feel dead. Every relationship falls like the one before, Each one shattered my heart like glass. I’ve given all, there’s nothing left to give, Now, I just exist, but don’t know how to live. They think I’m fine, that I’m still the same, The happy boy, the bright-eyed flame. The one who danced, who laughed, who shone, Who carried the weight of the world like it was his own. But the truth is, now, I’m shattered, split, and splintered, Like a mirror that has been dropped, And every time I pick it up, the pieces never lock. Once a sunbeam, now just smoke, A fading laugh, a forgotten joke. See, I used to be the boy who bubbled with joy, Now I’m the man that misery employs. I’m the punchline to jokes never told, I’m the shadow that hides in the bold. I used to shine, used to soar, Now I’m just trying to survive the war. Bright smiles buried beneath the grime, The clock keeps ticking, but I’m out of time. They’re waiting for me to come cut the cake, But how can I slice when it’s all just fake? I’m hiding in here, plotting an escape, Maybe I’ll slip through that window, leave no trace, Run to a place I’ve never known, But even there, this weight’s my own. What do I want? I don’t even know, Love? Maybe? But trust? It won’t grow. It’s like carrying mountains on my back, All this baggage from scars. Knock Knock “You coming out?” Yeah… I guess I’ll go out. Put on the smiley mask. Open the door, And I shout— “Heeeyyyy! Let’s turn it up, let’s shout!” They cheer, they dance, think I’m alright, But in this mask, I’m not here.
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