#machineheart
A grasp for air
scratching the surface
before submersion
steady my bearing
aware of the risks
of a breaching hull
sinking
set for the deep
where I dwell
silence, my raison d’être
prowling with a hum
of a machine heart
beating with my pulse
assessing the depths
with the voice
of my sonar eyes
survival hard-coded
patient
losing altitude
to rising pressure
knowing
there’s only one way
to suppress
the nature of
the beast within
notorious fear
reclaimed against
the threat
of my nemesis
for only the surface
knows
its place
Feb 25
Feb 25, 2026 at 7:15 AM UTC
there’s something akin to nuts and bolts in my heart, i think.
sometimes i wonder if it’s made out of stone,
or if it’s a machine.
feelings are messy —
and even though the world gave them names,
i can’t match the descriptions,
so i just rename.
something within sometimes pinches too hard.
i’m left wincing,
rubbing at my chest
as if it’ll soothe my past.
i intend to move on — that, i do —
but i can’t put it into words,
can’t explain why i am just because.
"i wasn’t always like this" —
but this?
i don’t know which version of me i speak of.
i’m worried.
deathly worried, more so.
but i just want to keep existing,
’cause —
what if there’s someone out there
willing to oil up these corkscrews in my brain,
have it speak to my heart,
make it make me speak —
and spell it all out?
i intend to find a love.
a mate.
’cause if i was born with something that intends to hurt,
i can’t believe
i was born without someone
who intends to heal
and aid.
May 24, 2025
May 24, 2025 at 2:22 PM UTC