#lostinthought
I’m not sad
at least I don’t think I am
but something in me feels… off
like a song playing in the wrong key
and I can’t find where it changed
I sit down
not because i’m tired
just because standing feels like too much to explain
my phone is there
my work is there
everything i’m supposed to care about is right there
but I just stare past it
like it belongs to someone else’s life
my mind is full
I think
but when I reach for a thought
there’s nothing i can hold
so what am I doing?
I don’t know
and that’s the worst part
because if something was wrong
at least I could point at it
name it
fight it
but this?
this has no face
it’s just me
sitting
existing
feeling like I missed a step somewhere
and now everything’s slightly out of sync
I tell myself to get up
“just move
just start
it’s not that hard”
but my body doesn’t listen
not because it can’t
just because it doesn’t want to
and I don’t even know why
and that scares me a little
not enough to panic
just enough to notice
like…
when did I stop understanding myself?
when did everything become something i have to push through
instead of something I just do?
so I stay there
a little too long
thinking
or trying to
or pretending to
while time keeps going
without asking me if i’m ready
and I know i’ll get up eventually
I always do
but right now
I’m just here
and somehow
that feels heavier
than it should
Mar 29
Mar 29, 2026 at 6:04 AM UTC
Take me to the movies
Tell me something you mean
Give me something I can cry about
Give me something I can feel
I've been miserable
My heart's been impaired
My mind's enraged
As if I would break
But these tears
It won't come out
Because I'm afraid
Please, let me cry
Mar 15, 2025
Mar 15, 2025 at 11:31 PM UTC
Drift and blur
Detachment
Fork in a socket
Reach out to catch but
Not falling at all
Why is it dark outside?
Jun 19, 2023
Jun 19, 2023 at 2:24 AM UTC
*
*Papers on my desk
Pondering on past mistakes
White dreams turn into dust*
*
Jun 30, 2020
Jun 30, 2020 at 5:10 AM UTC
Sit down take a breath feeling all this weight
Intake all the mistakes, the breaks, the maintain
Process all the information, the stats, the science
Another breath
With sore shoulders knees weak all I can do is shake
With tears in my eyes I hope I won’t break
Everything I give or they take
I have to remember:
-forever can be a second
-our life is entirety but to the universe it’s nothing
-the sky is blue but the color of the ground is forever changing
May 17, 2019
May 17, 2019 at 11:22 PM UTC
Some days, I recede
too far back into my mind.
Thoughts are like a maze –
it’s so easy to get lost,
the way back is hard to find.
Apr 17, 2015
Apr 17, 2015 at 9:46 AM UTC