#kms
i think i want to die,
thing is, i have to die perfect.
if i were to die, it must be the perfect death.
the date has to be significant, but
not significant like my birthday,
that's cliche.
it could be a day only a certain someone
would understand;
maybe i'll do it on her birthday.
i can't have any lingering problems
to carry with me six feet under,
so i'll have to make sure i make the necessary amends.
apologies to mutuals, return the borrowed, and
make peace with my delusions.
i want to look beautiful.
i need to fix up my appearance so when
the day comes around i'll be ready.
i'll practice my hairstyle for the occasion,
something that looks too innocent to be death.
maybe i'll even try some light makeup
or maybe i'll keep it clean, like i'd be once dead.
i'll wear something light and flowy and white;
white so that if i shed blood it will shine brighter,
and white because white is pure.
maybe it will be a soft looking dress with a neat lace headband,
it'll look so delicate and young.
young forever.
the cause also has to be chosen with consideration.
i have to do something that won't take long or be a hassle,
but it also has to make a statement.
maybe i'll hang from a rope tied to a tall tall oak
that is covered in matching lace to my headband.
maybe i'll profusely bleed out so that my dress
won't look so young and delicate.
it'll be perfect,
it has to be perfect.
May 19
May 19, 2026 at 7:35 PM UTC
:INPUT ATTEMPT——
SSBjYW7igJl0IGRvIHRoaXMgYW55bW9yZS4gRXZlcnlkYXkgaXMgY
SBsaXZpbmcgaGVsbHNjYXBlLiBFdmVyeXRoaW5nIGZlZWxzIGVtc
HR5LiBFdmVyeXRoaW5nIHRha2VzIHRvbyBtdWNoIGVmZm9ydC4
gSSBjYW7igJl0IGJlIGJvdGhlcmVkIHRvIGRvIGFueXRoaW5nLiBJ4oC
ZdmUgYmVjb21lIGFic29yYmVkIGludG8gbXkgcGhvbmUuIEJsb29kI
HJ1bnMgZG93biBteSB0aGlnaHMgYWxtb3N0IGRhaWx5LiBJdCBtYW
tlcyBtZSBmZWVsIGdvb2QgYW5kIGRpc2d1c3RpbmcgYXQgdGhlIH
NhbWUgdGltZS4gSSBjYW7igJl0IHN0b3AgbXkgdXJnZXMuIEl04oCZ
cyBiZWVuIDI3IGhvdXJzIGFuZCA1IG1pbnV0ZXMgc2luY2UgSeKAm
XZlIGN1dCBhcyBJ4oCZbSB0eXBpbmcgdGhpcy4gSSB0aGluayBJIHdp
bGwga2lsbCBteXNlbGYgc29vbiBlbm91Z2gsIGlmIHRoaXMgY29udGl
udWVzLg==
:OUTPUT SUCCESSFUL——
:endsystem.
Apr 1
Apr 1, 2026 at 9:24 PM UTC
life
would
be
better
for
everyone
if
I
was
just
gone
forget
about
me
I
dont
matter
anymore
i
never
did
and
never
will
let
me
sink
into
this
hole
and
die
Jan 6
Jan 6, 2026 at 8:47 PM UTC
the urge to somehow
**** myself painlessly
and allow
myself to walk around aimlessly
is starting to
creep up and up
as shampoo
dripped down from my hair
and i say to myself
when...?
Aug 25, 2024
Aug 25, 2024 at 7:43 AM UTC
The day after dying,
Your mortal shell will rot
And be filled with sleeping pills
No, sugar can not
Hide the pain you feel
From failing your many deaths,
Immortal now and always,
A hundred final breaths.
The day after dying,
You're nothing but a husk,
An empty, rotting hell
That lies awake until dusk,
Just contemplating painful existence
That wounds every inch of you.
Words, knives, and other pains
Don't feel enough in joy's lieu.
The day after dying,
Nothing will even change.
You'll still be a hopeless wreck.
You'll still be from peers estranged.
You'll still be a walking corpse.
You'll still never be alive.
You'll always wish you'd succeeded.
You'll feel useless just like I've.
Apr 12, 2021
Apr 12, 2021 at 11:27 AM UTC
-Hate yourself to the point of misery
-Slash your skin into oblivion
-Make your flesh a canopy of the hatred you feel
-Still feel numb after all of the pain
-Get yourself a rope
-Hang the rope on a sturdy branch
-Tie the knot properly
- make a loop
- spiral the rope around the loop
- tuck the rope through the loop
- pull on the end to tighten
-Pull a stool under your necklace
-Stand on the stood and wear your craft
-Kick the stool away
-"Look, Mum! No hands!"
-Think of your mum.... and others you love...
-Gasp for air but find none
-Shed a tear, cry out in agony
-Feel your neck being stretched out
-Remember the lovely touches from your loved ones... Remember how your brother used to nuzzle up by your chest and whisper against your neck
-Remember the times your friends used to hug you around the neck
-Remember the way Their lips felt against your supple skin
-Cry out harshly one final time
...Darkness
Nothing is left anymore...
-You did it!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The pain you face doesn't go away when you do. It's simply transferred onto others. The ones who cry at your funeral, the ones who will miss your voice, the ones who notice an empty place where you used to sit, the ones who shed a tear at the mention of your name, and even the ones who seemed to hate you will still love you the same. They'll be devastated. If you ever need to talk with somebody, I've been here before. I've been to the lowest of lows, and I've attempted before. You can always talk with me. My instagram DMs are open all the time. @darlingdrawingqueen
Don't be afraid to reach out. Your life is important, and you are loved by so many people. If not until now, then I love you. I love you so much, and I really want to get to know you.
Dec 24, 2020
Dec 24, 2020 at 11:36 PM UTC
that's all i hear that's all they say
maybe i will some fateful day
until then i'll make them stop
i'll **** them all till the voices drop
maybe you help maybe you don't
maybe i'll die maybe i won't
bye my friend this is my final note
than i will slit my throat
slit my wrists let them bleed
please never be filled with greed
my time runs short in ****** sheets
to my death throw in some sweets
Dec 3, 2020
Dec 3, 2020 at 10:03 PM UTC
Every time I stare into my reflection
Blood starts to surface
I’m not one to be offended by rejection
But the reflection refuses my stance
I’d call myself an infection
The hairs on my neck start to dance.
I feel like an outcast from the world
I'm definitely there
But no one seems to care
Just because you can’t see me
It doesn’t mean i'm not there
I'm like the stars in the daylight
But you can see me clearly In the dark night
Isn’t it ironic the way I express
My mind feels blank but at the same time i'm a mess.
Apr 13, 2019
Apr 13, 2019 at 1:38 PM UTC
When the smallest thing happens to me, I think:
"take my life away
just do it
i don't wanna be here anymore
like seriously,what the ****
kms."
Mar 11, 2019
Mar 11, 2019 at 5:52 PM UTC
Kms means **** myself
Except it doesn't
It means this *****
So when I say kms
Just know that I'm suffering
But I don't actually wanna die
Because when I do
I keep it in
And it'll go away
Cms
That's an acronym I'd use
It means cut myself
And when I say that
I actually mean it
Like now
Or 2 nights ago
Or 2 weeks ago
Each time a new spot
But a spot no one can see
My hips
My stomach
The skin under my *****
It's a habit I can't break
An addiction I can't go to rehab for
I'm fine
I promise.
Dec 12, 2018
Dec 12, 2018 at 8:37 PM UTC
I think I am
going to **** myself.
Maybe not today,
or next week,
or even next year.
But I can feel it.
I will end my life,
on my own terms
Nov 30, 2018
Nov 30, 2018 at 9:46 AM UTC
I’m drowning.
And I’ve gotten so used to this feeling...
That I could go jump into a pool...
And not feel a **** thing...
As I hold my head...
Underwater.
Nov 21, 2018
Nov 21, 2018 at 6:29 PM UTC
Every time I look in the mirror
I’m confused by my reflection
I don’t think I’ve ever recognized her
It’s complete and utter deception
Those bright eyes that I once knew
Are now useless and dimly lit
Hiding and concealing all that’s true
As if that could make me ever forget
The lies that they once spewed
Whether I was aware of it or not
Especially how trust can’t be renewed
And how loyalty can’t ever be taught
Funny I never thought that’d be me
I never took the time to know who I am
I hate myself for not being able to see
That I’m just a lying, attention seeking sham
Jul 7, 2018
Jul 7, 2018 at 9:47 PM UTC
The word emo is used to describe someone who dresses dark and scary.
Or someone who hurts themself.
For me, it’s a word I use to describe my real emotions.
Emo = emotion
I am “emo” because I am emotional.
Sure, I joke around a lot.
I make fun of my own emotions.
I call myself emo just because I like wearing black.
But there’s a reason why I wear all that black.
I’m too afraid to be happy.
I’m don’t deserve to wear color.
I feel like I should always be grieving.
I feel like I don’t deserve happiness.
Why would I?
I always feel guilty for what happened back in the seventh grade.
I could’ve done more.
I could’ve been more useful.
That’s a lie.
I’m useless.
Worthless.
A terrible person.
The point is that I am the original emo.
Not because I wear black.
But because I am emotional.
Does that make me human?
No.
It just makes me sad.
That’s as plane as it gets.
I’m just sad.
Mar 23, 2018
Mar 23, 2018 at 11:20 AM UTC
My head spins,
As I lie down.
I stare at the ceiling,
Feeling light,
Weightless.
And sick.
Gathering strength,
I lift myself from my bed,
And carry myself to the bathroom.
In the mirror,
I see a whale.
Despite so long of holding back desire and cravings,
What i see is still the same,
And it will never change.
Mar 22, 2018
Mar 22, 2018 at 7:10 PM UTC
something just feels
off
and wrong
something isn't sitting right inside me
it's telling me to get up - go go go go go
go do that one thing
but im not sure where it wants me to go
or what one thing it wants me to do.
it's a feeling of urgency
without a proper cause
what is wrong with me?
Feb 25, 2018
Feb 25, 2018 at 10:35 PM UTC
I love him.
I love him so much.
And it hurts so bad.
I don't deserve him,
But I need him.
Feb 6, 2018
Feb 6, 2018 at 3:06 PM UTC
Kate said that she liked bricks.
I was taught that bricks are bad.
And they are bad.
Kate likes to tell me about bricks.
I don't like to listen,
But I must listen or else Kate will lay bricks down.
Kate scares me.
I don't want to talk to her,
But I must.
I don't want to become like Kate,
And I don't want others to become like Kate.
Bricks are bad.
Stay away from Bricks and Brick Layers.
Jan 13, 2018
Jan 13, 2018 at 1:25 AM UTC
What a guy,
Me oh my.
His hands move fast,
Makes me want to cast,
A line into the water avast,
Ye matey he is the most ashen fellow
My god sometimes he looks quite yellow;
When the trumpets blare,
He gives them a stare,
And the words we fear,
He says just loud enough to hear,
I have never been so disappointed in my life,
Oh boy what a tear.
Jan 12, 2018
Jan 12, 2018 at 1:08 PM UTC
My eyes snap open:
I am walking
not by choice
for I am weighted down
it lurks behind me
every second
of every day.
People stare
and goggle at me
tongues throw knives
"Why are you so strange?"
some miss entirely
"Why can't you be normal?"
others hit home.
Doubt is constantly,
relentlessly,
gnawing at my brain
How?
Why?
When?
Too many questions
What if all I ever do,
when light recedes
Is stare up at the ceiling
And drown in the past
When I think I've come up for air
I find a crashing wave of nightmares
That shoves me further down.
I do not understand
I lack perfect vision
Yet it is not I
that cannot see clearly
Even when the trees
***** at my eyes like needles
Nothing stops the pain
no matter how hard I try
I cannot escape
No matter how hard I try
No matter how far I get.
I end up
Closer than ever before
One day
I will be too tired
to keep going.
It will consume me.
And I will be lost.
Forever. I Am Sorry
Jul 2, 2017
Jul 2, 2017 at 2:16 PM UTC
I am NOT sad.
I am DEPRESSED.
There is a huge difference.
If you don't get it then got look it up.
Learn about it before you judge me.
Deal with it or leave because there is only one cure. I won't get it for a long while. be there for me or leave.
I am done. With it all.
Only a few things are keeping me from finding a blade or overdosing.
RIGHT NOW.
So before you want to run your mouth.... how bout ya make an effort, know me. Then maybe you can be smarter about what you gotta say.
Jan 20, 2017
Jan 20, 2017 at 9:57 PM UTC
It's me who is my enemy,
Me who beats me up,
Me who makes the monsters,
Me who strips my confidence.
Jan 20, 2017
Jan 20, 2017 at 9:42 PM UTC
Life doesn't hurt until you think about how things have changed, people you've lost, and how much of it was
.....Your fault....
Jan 20, 2017
Jan 20, 2017 at 9:30 PM UTC
"You ruined your body, It's covered in scars, are you happy now??"
"You really think I did this to be happy?!"
Jan 20, 2017
Jan 20, 2017 at 9:20 PM UTC