#klonopin
there's someone
in my head, but
it's not me.
“there was always that
for everyone, some
just more than others.”
I have a *******
military base
in my head.
I am planning out
missions taking place
halfway around the world.
“I hate needing something.
it makes me feel weak.”
I was the same way
for human assistance.
but the drugs? those
were just chemicals
and I am a science
experiment.
I'm something
you have known
about for months,
finally throwing
together at the
last moment.
Jan 12, 2018
Jan 12, 2018 at 12:50 PM UTC
I'd tar and feather you
Parade you around the town square grounds
probably shoot you dead with my colt single action
or draw and quarter you with four fine stallions,
or sic the dogs on you with no mercy.
but, alas it's 2017. So I will just sit here and write nonsense.
-E.
Mar 12, 2017
Mar 12, 2017 at 12:46 AM UTC
my heart felt black and cold
so I took four little green pills to take the edge off my wandering mind
thoughts of wanting to die
but when those weren't enough I let one more dissolve under my tongue
because they say that gets into your bloodstream
they say that's how to really make it work
and suddenly I was floating into a white light
there was nothing around me
not even my thoughts
I guess I understand now why van ghoh ate the yellow paint
I guess I understand why people crash their cars into trees
and wrap them around poles
when your heart feels like it's rotting from the inside you you'll do anything to feel the light
May 4, 2016
May 4, 2016 at 1:16 PM UTC
Last class:
Muddled mind and bleary eyed
Concentration took a fall
Find a hollow - crawl inside
Lost the pills to Now-Tow Hall
Benzos - always second choice
Wear my Kpen like a shawl
Want to whine with all my voice
GIVE ME BACK MY ADDERALL
This class:
**Iris in on what's inside
Orange bottle of enthrall
Guidance, I will not abide
my true love - oh adderall
Tweaking out with pupils wide
Shrink my presence, oh so small,
Temptations I will all abide
Personified a mere rag doll.**
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 8:31 AM UTC
The sunflower dreams disintegrate, leaving dust. I see you there through the plexiglass wall, and wonder if you can see me too. The wax drips from the tip of the candle. Five spots, six-seven. Nine. I burn for you. The red runs crimson down my thigh. I reach for you through my condemned klonopin haze. Once again, I was too weak for you. The pressure builds, forming cracks in my psyche, making me wonder who I am or where I’m going.
Blank spaces. The canvas between white and black, the words that don’t fill the spaces in between I love you. And I don’t know what you want me to do, so I sit outside and chain smoke and listen to the birds who are confused, because it’s raining. I’m sick, you say, as if that straightens out the jumble in my mind. We’re solving the world’s problems one puff of nicotine at a time.
Oct 5, 2014
Oct 5, 2014 at 12:12 PM UTC