#imback
I pick at my skin
to the sounds of our memories
I pluck the hairs that stand up
when I hear your name
I tear myself down in the love
I have for you
There's a leash around my brain
I'm tired of yanking it away
from the thoughts of your eyes
that wont ever look at mine
there's a cage around my heart
wired with hope
(where is the key?)
and while I'm filled with so much affection
I look at myself as a joke
once a queen, now a blue fool
I apologize to myself for being so cruel
It is not your fault you are tangled
in another soul
but I still blame myself
for always watering a plant
I should have sold.
Feb 3, 2025
Feb 3, 2025 at 4:14 PM UTC
Hi, I’m back and well…it’s been a while since I’ve been on here. I won’t be as active but I will be here.
Jun 12, 2023
Jun 12, 2023 at 6:35 PM UTC
Thinking about you between meetings,
Between meals, between showers,
Between random scrolling on the internet,
Makes me giddy and profoundly safe.
Lately may have been hectic,
Crowded of thoughts and uncertainties.
Thinking about you solely,
Does not ease any of it truthfully
But choosing you among those things, does.
Remembering why we even started
How you make me feel enough and heard
How I can still picture vividly the first time you kissed me and how it smells
In hopes that the feelings and memories
won’t be slowly slipping away.
Those full infinitives
In the future are not what I am after all
From then on ‘til now
That’s what really matters.
Jun 1, 2023
Jun 1, 2023 at 8:37 AM UTC
You walk away
For a day
For a month
For a year
You say it's okay
It's a faze
It's just for a day
It'll go away
Then you realize
In a moment
In a blur
That you have forgotten
Abandon and ignored
The words you've penned
The poems you've cared for
Now you have returned
To a familiar place
With a different face
The time has come
To end the hiatus
© Sofia Villagrana 2021
Dec 20, 2021
Dec 20, 2021 at 6:17 PM UTC
I
think
we're
both
addicted
To the
M
A
D
N
E
S
S
Of loving from a
distance
Nov 9, 2020
Nov 9, 2020 at 8:51 AM UTC
Never knew I was being missed after a long time
that the voices inside my head decided to greet me every night lately.
Apr 9, 2020
Apr 9, 2020 at 8:50 AM UTC
With eyes of blue and sea foam too,
There’s not a moment in time that
I
Don’t
Love
You
Mar 4, 2020
Mar 4, 2020 at 7:38 PM UTC
weakness is my strength.
Because God said
his power is made perfect in weakness.
He can make my darkest nights
into fires to warm other people's hearts.
He can make my wounds into
reminders of how beautiful
life can be.
He can make my broken moons into
kaleidoscopes,
to realise their all
made to make someone else
realise the truth.
He can make my stormy seas
into gentle whispers of
understanding and a
bridge of love.
He is my God.
And im not ashamed to say so.
Bash me,
bruise me,
mock me
say i should be sorry,
tear apart my heart into two
and say im wicked,
pull out my eyes and
mock them too.
mock how i see things.
continue to break my moons
continue to show me i am weak
continue to point out my darkest nights
continue to remind me of God
continue to remind me of my
sheer mortality.
remind me of the lies some can say.
remind me.
remind me how powerful God can be.
share with me open doors by which
prayers can be sent through,
and allow me to
seek and
question my faith.
what is faith without doubt
what is growth without a painful season of pruning
what is the value of life without
knowing the suffering of my deadly ways.
who am i without God?
so go ahead and
make my journey more painful.
so go ahead
to test my patience and
reveal my inner workings
to see if i do love
see how i can improve
see how i can crack, break
to mend another heart.
weakness is my strength.
night skies are just as bright as the sun.
my most painful moments can be beautiful.
in God i am strong.
in God i am loved
in God you are strong
in God you are loved.
my Child.
Feb 16, 2020
Feb 16, 2020 at 10:55 AM UTC
I'm doing much better now
Than what I was before
Every little thing used to set me off
But now I don't mind them anymore
Haven't had a mental breakdown
In a month and two weeks
I know exactly who to thank
And he knows who he is
He's made my life so much better
By just being there for me
Holding me, kissing me, telling me I'm beautiful
Oh, and the oversized hoodies.
Nov 22, 2019
Nov 22, 2019 at 5:27 PM UTC
You waited for me
And I failed to come
I deserve to be forgotten in this dusty hole
Because of what I've done
Jul 22, 2019
Jul 22, 2019 at 8:41 PM UTC
I think i needed
Some time in silence
Scared shitless
And shaking
And needing
Every second of it
But can you see me
It's dark
I think i needed
Some time in silence
Scared shitless
And shaking
And needing
Every second of it
But can you see me
It's dark
Mar 5, 2019
Mar 5, 2019 at 3:04 PM UTC
Hey everyone,
I’m back and have been writing more than ever! I hope to get some of my current work on here! If you have an Instagram though, go follow me!
Sep 18, 2018
Sep 18, 2018 at 10:03 AM UTC
Hello to old friends and hello to new ones
I’ve been gone but now I’m back
And I won’t be going anywhere anytime soon
I’m a bit rusty and disused but with some work I’ll be as good as new
Nov 9, 2017
Nov 9, 2017 at 9:54 PM UTC
It's not common of me to be late,
It's not something for which I strive,
Day in and day out you sit out front and wait,
You wait to see if I'm late so you may wake the hive.
The hive of insults and jeers,
Just to make me look inadequate,
You amp it up inside just for the cheers,
the cheers of all inside who want me to quit.
It's not something I want,
All this hate because of a mistake,
With my head hung low as you flaunt
The fire you brought to me tied at the stake.
Enjoy yourself for now
because soon that fire will be mine.
And when its mine you'll wonder how
You became the first burning in line.
The fires of my rage burn brighter and brighter
while your darkness grows dimmer.
The day is coming for me to be free,
And a glorious revenge I
WILL
TAKE.
Oct 4, 2017
Oct 4, 2017 at 9:49 PM UTC
These poems are just words I write to help pass sleepless nights, for when you're hearts not close and the sky has lost its lights.
Jun 9, 2017
Jun 9, 2017 at 5:39 AM UTC
They say in a way that time heals all,
That it sort of cushions or eases the fall.
That in the end things will get better,
Even if you are waiting on forever.
But time is simply a passing phase,
A clock slowly ticking away at your days.
Time is only a mere distraction,
It is meant to keep you from the attraction.
It grabs you by the wrist and refuses to let go.
And even when you look down, there is nothing below.
Because no matter what, you are stranded in time.
You cannot get out nor escape your mind.
So accept the fate that has been given to you,
And remember that time was never meant to be true.
Nov 3, 2016
Nov 3, 2016 at 12:11 AM UTC
It's been a lot time,
since I've been on here.
Things have changed,
and school is now over.
Graduation came and went,
now I get to stay at home.
I haven't been on here,
in a very long time.
I don't know if anyone sees me,
or even cares when I write on here.
But I love to write,
have since I can remember.
So I will do my best,
to keep sharing my feels on here.
Where I can do so privately,
without revealing personal info.
Hello again, everyone on here.
Oct 27, 2016
Oct 27, 2016 at 10:52 PM UTC
I sit here at 2am
wanting to talk to you
because I can’t sleep.
These thoughts are keeping me up
and I swear I’m losing myself because of them,
I feel so empty and so cold
the only thing keeping me warm is
the smoke from this burning cigarette.
Jun 6, 2016
Jun 6, 2016 at 2:08 AM UTC
Don't you dare wish for the death of your soul.
Please don't hope at 17 that your life is cut short,
Because somewhere out there, a little girl, only a few years old, hasn't lived to make her first mistake, while you attempt to make your last, the innocence of her soul is severed quickly from her body, fighting for her life while you slit your wrists just because some boy just doesn't ******* love you back.
Don't you dare try to tell me your life isn't worth living, because the only God forsaken problem you have is the lack of the innocent love of a teenage boy.
Jan 25, 2016
Jan 25, 2016 at 8:54 PM UTC
Quit Date: 10/27 11/1
A billow of smoke wallowing down the side walk
A Marlboro dangling from my lips
Enveloped by gentle sniffles
My glassy doe eyes ringed in charcoal,
Tracing cars whizzing around me like bullets,
And I think about pulling the trigger.
A shuffle and a lean, a simple solution
And as my body collides
With these guzzling hunks of metal
United with the afterlife through searing edges
Flinging my soul from this hollow cavern,
To be reborn in a new shell, or
To greet the most intelligent engineer, or
To hover in between dimensions, or
To be blinded by an ebony cloak of darkness, or
And deafened by an infinite silence.
This ensemble I longed for years ago.
And the sting of the needle
Flashed before my eyes like these swimming headlights.
And it’s 2011, attempt #2, I think,
I’m in my room,
I close my eyes,
I wait to die.
I open my eyes,
I’m in the hospital,
A mummy wrapped in saline-pumping tubes.
And I realize I’m bad at killing myself.
And I realize I won’t feel his finger nails on my collarbone.
And I realize I won’t hear my mother’s piercing cackle,
And I realize I won’t see my brother’s band on tour.
And I realize I won’t smell grass after it rains.
And I realize I won’t taste my name on his tongue.
And I realize I won’t ever get the chance to tell everyone that I’m so happy that I’m bad at killing myself.
I sit on the curb,
With a tight chest,
Shaking hands,
And a stupid grin.
Enough is enough.
I’ll quit smoking the day after Halloween,
This is my last pack.
Oct 27, 2015
Oct 27, 2015 at 9:32 PM UTC