#hustling
My average means I don’t have to take final exams.
So my bachelor's degree is a finished product.
I cranked it out, all that’s left now is the walk (May 18th).
Let’s call it my nearly forgotten masterpiece.
My schedule says that I start a 1-year ‘master of public health’ degree in 38 days.
It was my mom’s idea. She said, “You need to keep active” (pre- med-school).
It sounds crazier to me now than it did last year, when I was accepted and agreed.
Now, I feel like some chary, aging showgirl who’s about to be hustled back on-stage.
But what’s life without massive compromise?
Anyway, don’t cry for me. I’m still sizing it all up, I’ll figure it out.
I suppose we’re all out there hustling.
It’s our response to slowing med-school admissions,
those glitches in the medical, industrial education complex
or that’s how the narrative’s shaped, anyway.
It’s not the additional work that bothers me, I’m regular worker bee,
It’s the perma-threat of loneliness.
I’m already packing. Leaving feels real
and I'm surfing this maudlin wave tonight—shading deep blue.
The simple march of time will take away friends I’ve grown to love.
We’ve allegorised and transformed one another by proximity.
I’ve really loved it here.
.
.
Songs for this:
Graduation (Friends Forever) by Vitamin C
Graduation Day by Tony Rivers & The Castaways
Apr 21, 2025
Apr 21, 2025 at 8:01 AM UTC
There are
Streets that cry,
Bleed and sigh,
******* with you,
Til' you can't
Sleep at night...
Streets that you
Feel like can
Read your mind,
Streets that you
Just can't
Leave behind.
There are
Streets that cry,
Bleed and sigh,
Filled with the
People who just
Breathe and die,
There are
Streets that cry,
Bleed and sigh,
And streets that
You never want
To leave behind...
Apr 29, 2023
Apr 29, 2023 at 7:51 PM UTC
I've felt the cold,
Of winter midnights.
The things you see,
Upon the streets.
I've lived through guns,
So many fistfights,
And all the things
They did to me...
It ain't the same,
Every morning...
Somebody new
Wakes up as me...
And I don't know,
Just where I'm going...
All I know,
Is that I'm free!
There are no chains!
Upon me!
There are no chains!
Upon me!
Well, I can see,
The stars now,
And I know what lies
Beyond...
Cause only glory
Waits for me there,
And all the things,
Of which I'm fond...
Another glass you
Raise to me!
For when I'm dead,
And when I'm gone...
But you remember
What I say, now!
Cause we'll be friends
Long when we're gone...
And I can see it...
That gray day.
And I can smell it!
That horrible rain!
But I don't feel it...
There's no more pain.
And nothing,
Will ever be the same...
Dec 7, 2019
Dec 7, 2019 at 9:48 AM UTC
Wake up every morning
Wondering if I
Should live or die,
Think about my friends
I know are waiting for me
In the sky,
Shotgun in my bed,
I take it out and
Then I Pump the slide,
Put it in my mouth
And give myself
Some time to wonder why,
Should I pull this trigger,
Or should I just go
Lay down and die?
Should I curl up in a ball,
Or should I let my
Feelings lie?
Reaching for my Xanax
'Cause that bottle is
Just all I've got,
Pop a couple just to
Make the voices stop
So I can rise.
Gotta find a reason
Just to get up
Off my lazy ***
End up on the streets
Where you can find me
Flipping **** for cash.
Looking for some ****
You need that hard?
You know I've got your back.
Need some company?
I've got this number,
And she'll call you back.
When the day is over,
Hit the bus and I
Just stumble back,
Pop a few more Xanax,
Smoke a blunt,
And then i hit the sack,
Open up my eyes,
And reach between my
Mattress once again,
Shotgun in my mouth,
And cradle it
Like it's my only friend.
Mar 13, 2023
Mar 13, 2023 at 11:15 AM UTC
Lone leaf hangs onto the branch of a tree on the cliff side,
Nods at the breaking waves below.
The hustle of the wind,
Cause the autumn leaf to fall,
Twisting and turning through the rough air,
Like a butterfly in flight.
Down, down it flutters,
Whispering, singing exhausted.
The diver saw the pain and beauty in the leaf,
Caught it in mid air,
And both shimmered down onto the waves.
Even the smallest leaf must face its destiny,
Saved by the battering waves,
It was buried in the diver's garden.
2/3/2020
Mar 2, 2020
Mar 2, 2020 at 10:22 AM UTC
Let the thing
We mean to be
Know the thing
We feel we are
A bounce hustling and
Howling mysteriously
Through you
Getting older has never been
In my plans but it's never late
Enough for me to stay
Aug 9, 2019
Aug 9, 2019 at 2:40 AM UTC
Always so insecure,
There seems no cure..
In the hunger of more,
Feeling anxiety till core..
Hustling ,
To end hustles,..
Building a dream,
All in bubbles..
Looking back,
Its hell and cries..
Trying to climb up,
There's a valley along,
deep enough to die..
Ahead i race,
Soul not keeping pace.
Nov 24, 2018
Nov 24, 2018 at 10:13 PM UTC
I lived through it,
The up and down times
When I sold ***
And did other petty crimes.
I was there when
Hot girls were really guys
Hiding floppy secrets
Between their nyloned thighs.
I loved through it,
Saturdays that started
On Tuesday morning
When I first departed;
Two packs of cigs
And a week’s doobies,
By then a value
Almost that of rubies.
I laughed through it,
A **** ***** your jokes
Were so funny if
You were providing smokes.
I flattered and flirted
Whatever it would finally take
To score a bit of ****
Even the skimpiest shake.
I lolled through it,
Lying buck naked in your bed
Or with your guests
Whatever you originally said
Because you scored,
You were the source of dope.
Without your patronage
I didn’t have a moment of hope.
I hitchhiked through it,
Long trips back from Malibu
When I had worn out
My welcome to the world of you.
I hope the ride might be
Another adventure; more ****
Or some food and drink
To satisfy my every begging need.
Feb 10, 2016
Feb 10, 2016 at 5:51 PM UTC