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My dad’s unwilting enthusiasm
does little to reduce my anxiety
actually quite augments it
as I try not to hit the pavement
I am only 7 but feel very responsible
not only for the things I do,
like cutting the roses from the garden
and having my mum get mad
but also for the things I cannot do
like grabbing the handlebars assuredly
and keeping the bike under me
trying to perform some kind of conjuring act
Lowering the seat does help, feet now firmly on the ground
with loose elbows and a light grip on the handlebars
I close my eyes and, lo and behold, now I am a ballerina
swirling around like in a satin-lined jewelry box
My reverie is soon interrupted by my dad’s gentle voice
I tell him I did the splits, even touched my toes
“Seems like you don’ t wanna ride,” he says
with eyes of blue, a hint of a smile
I can still hear his voice in my ears
“Don’t try to do things you don’t like
just because anyone can do them”
May 17, 2016
May 17, 2016 at 12:36 PM UTC