#growingapart
Well now it’s quiet.
Forgot your name, forgot your face, forgot your voice, forgot your laugh, forgot your fears.
I cried too many tears,
failing to recall your name.
Who are you?
Who is this idea of a person in my mind?
Who I enshrined
but why and when?
Can you introduce your face again?
A stranger who feels like home,
a face I couldn’t forget,
but did forget.
Your words are cheap,
but well known.
I forgot but did you too?
I feel as if you know everything I knew.
Our skin is unaccustomed to one another but our souls are tied by a million knots I oversaw.
Two snowflakes falling from the same cloud just to melt alone.
I feel relief when I hear your unacquainted voice,
was this a choice?
A squirrel in winter,
a deer in summer.
Mar 11
Mar 11, 2026 at 9:41 AM UTC
Distance grows between us like the ends of hair.
The beginning of the end comes far before the root.
Splits unable to fix,
only able to trim until there is nothing left to repair.
It is only your spine that faces me.
It’s curvature highlighted in the sun,
turning away from me like the sunflowers around you.
Growing towards your light, away from my doom.
Losing you slowly,
a fading memory you’ll forget in a year's time.
I’ll stay lingering, like your scent in the air.
Hand outstretched, lightyears away
a crowd awaiting you.
And so I sit,
Cherishing the shadow you leave behind.
Knowing that by the next day it will be gone,
and you with it.
Nov 21, 2025
Nov 21, 2025 at 12:32 AM UTC
you're right In front of me but still I grieve you
my feelings have changed the feel of your cheeks
the warmth of your voice and the feel of your touch
I flinch at your contact although I don't mean to
you stare into my eyes and even then I grieve you
there's something about you that's not entirely 'you'
what has changed , what did a couple months do to you ?
you're right Infront of me but still I grieve you
you grin at me and still I grieve you
your smile lacks the innocence you once held
all your beauty is suddenly so blue
and your heart is so far it has escaped
May 28, 2025
May 28, 2025 at 8:04 PM UTC
I Miss when we were friends
When we would sit and laugh
I didn't savor those moments
And so they left in a flash
We used to be so close
i shared with you my heart
And I know this is normal,
Growing apart.
Summer went to fall
And fall ended too fast
The frost and snow fell
Because nothing good lasts
But the flowers thaw through
And new things start
So I think I'm okay
with us growing apart.
Mar 29, 2025
Mar 29, 2025 at 4:03 PM UTC
i wonder
what you ever did
with all of the friendship bracelets
we had
i still wear them
it hurts too much to take them off
i wonder
if you still remember our secret handshake
that we made up
in the 2nd grade
and kept using
for years
i still practice it
with my tear-stained reflection
in the broken mirror
i wonder
if you still think about me
as often as i think about you
i keep going back
to our old, happy memories
the ones that you (probably) forgot
i sure hope not
because those are the memories
i can't get myself to throw away
i wonder
what you did
with all the pictures of me on your phone
did you delete them
or do you just keep them there
leaving them alone,
just like you did with the real me
i can't believe
that i managed
to cut your face out of a photo
a hole of emptiness-
resembling the one in my soul
i really miss you
but friends grow apart, i guess
Dec 6, 2024
Dec 6, 2024 at 12:13 AM UTC
I miss the good old days
Where we would go to the mall
Read books
Write poetry
And laugh
I miss the good old days
Where we would sleep over at each others houses
Talking about boys
And girls
And music
I miss the good old days
Where we would fight
But the next day
We would hug and make up
I miss the good old days
Where we would watch sad movies
And cry our hearts out
While hugging each other
I miss the good old days
Where we could call each other
Best friends
But i guess
Friends grow apart
I wish we didnt
Because I miss the good old days
And I hope you do too...
Nov 26, 2024
Nov 26, 2024 at 8:33 PM UTC
i'm not sure what it is, but tonight i'm thinking about people i used to know.
my childhood best friend, i hear she's awful now but i still love her no matter what, even though i haven't seen her in years. the boy who told me he was in love with me and gave me a crescent-moon thumbnail scar that i still carry today, having not seen him in four years. I look at my left hand and think of our friendship. My grandmother, long past ashes now, with her secret candy drawer, teaching me how to knit and giving me incorrect interpretations of country music. the boy that moved briefly into my drama class, downloaded one of my favourite albums to my phone and took my heart with him when he left. i think of him when i hear those songs, still some of my favourites. ny third grade teacher who told me about idioms and made me write my ks a specific way. my handwriting still looks like your name, sir. the boy who would fix my hair when it got messy, who moved on to cooler friends, and acts like he never touched my face for the sake of it. i still have his number. the girl who i loved books with for years, until we began to read different things and ran out of things to talk about. The boy i dated that sat on the floor of the mall with me and talked to me about all his favourite tv shows and held my head in his lap and never read the book i got him for chirstmas and now only calls me by my last name. the boy who i bought hotwheels in an airport with. i haven't peeled the complementary sticker off my headphones yet, so i haven't stopped thinking of him. on nights like these i miss them. i remember them tenderly. i still feel their phantom arms around me, and it is emptier than a lack of sensation. my heart is a bus stop, more empty for having been full.
Sep 12, 2024
Sep 12, 2024 at 9:01 AM UTC
Sweat attack
I'm Solo Dolo
On re-lax mode
Who's asking?
Lack of plastic evidence
Let that hot modern medicine
Do the rest
No where to go
No hope in tact
Blabbing til I couldn't
hardly move my mouth
If it was allowed
I'm sure
That this tongue could
Move mountains
Jun 22, 2024
Jun 22, 2024 at 1:08 PM UTC
Sometimes,
all that's left of a friend is the wallet they bought you for your birthday, in the bittersweet smile that appears on your face when you remember that moment.
Sometimes,
they are only in the stories you tell. Their name escapes your lips before you even realize they were there.
Sometimes,
they are in the little moments of regret.
The dull pain between so very few heartbeats before they're gone again.
Sometimes,
they are in shelves of shops,
in "they would like it" thoughts before you realize you can't even remember the last time you've met.
Sometimes,
they are in the moments when you can.
But now they only exist in old photobooks, in fading memories.
In dreams, their faces side by side complete strangers.
They are everywhere.
But really, they are nowhere.
Mar 19, 2020
Mar 19, 2020 at 8:09 PM UTC
I used to be included, back when the group was small.
I used to play the game, back when we weren't yet as grown.
But now, I stopped arriving at the events you planned.
Bailing at last second, the brain yells it's a mistake.
The years flew by, anxiety holding me back.
Back home where I heard of the fun they had.
The lingo they developed, experiences they shared.
Inside jokes and common friends I've never even met.
It's a certain type of loneliness, the friend on the outside.
A certain type of pain when you're the only one to blame.
Stopped to be invited, what did you expect? When you never show up to the insane plans they make.
I'm so tired of being on the outside, being all alone.
Surrounded by my friends and convinced that they don't like me.
So tired of looking through the blinds, only catching glimpses of their lives.
One might say, the solution is simple.
Just get into the new-old group, bland right back inside.
But how will I accomplish it without the proper tools?
I ask you now, how do I get into the room?
Another says I communicate my problem.
Please consider that I'm a human disaster.
Don't like to talk of feelings, don't want to talk of pain.
It's so much easier to repress it all again.
Dec 31, 2019
Dec 31, 2019 at 9:01 AM UTC
I never know where I am
in relation to you.
i wade through the grass mud on my shoes
You're here, and then
your eyes close off to me.
the light flits through the trees
It happens more and more often,
and yet I can't slip away.
i follow the light through thicket and clay
I think about us
so much, I can't sleep.
the light gets away and the mud is deep
You're gone when I blink.
i sink
Jun 25, 2019
Jun 25, 2019 at 10:53 PM UTC
Our love was like a rose
At first it was lovingly cared for and vibrant
But over time we both began to neglect it
It began to wilt
Our hatred caused it to wilt
And once it started to die there was no going back
It could not be renewed
Just like our love
Though the rose was still vibrant in color
And still smelled sweet
You could see how fragile it had became
As if at any moment it would break and fall apart
Like any kind of neglect would cause the petals to crumble
But although this rose-our love was nearly dead
We continued on as if everything was okay
Because we was so used to seeing the beauty
We refused to agonize the ugliness it now possessed
Nov 7, 2017
Nov 7, 2017 at 11:08 AM UTC
I remember the feeling
Of walking into clouds that were bleeding
That’s the kind of love I always needed
The kind that comes and goes
You followed me all over
Watering me until I grew older
But what I finally realized about you
Was a memory that never grows
If you knew me once
I’m not that way anymore
You always lived in the past
But that’s not what tomorrows for
I remember the meaning
Of chasing clouds that were leaving
That’s the kind of love I always hated
The kind that comes and goes
You made me follow you all over
Denying me because I was older
But what I finally realized about you
Was a future that never knows
If you knew me once
I’m not that way anymore
You always talked about tomorrow
But that’s not what you wanted me for
Apr 9, 2015
Apr 9, 2015 at 11:09 PM UTC