#futureme
dear future me:
I'm sorry.
I was too lonely
and too depressed
to think something good could happen.
because of that
i lost myself.
i hope you are finally happy.
i'm sorry.
sincerely,
me
-k.c. 2020
Nov 10, 2020
Nov 10, 2020 at 8:22 PM UTC
I am looking for fast love
the kind that touches me and tingles spread
the kind that smiles and I can not not smile back
the kind that laughs loudly with me over funny stuff
or holds me tight on cold nights
or just because he can
the kind that gets matching tattoos and stays
the kind that kisses me with need and want
in between ice cream with cold lips
or on hot days when we think no one is watching
the kind that makes breakfast with me on weekends
in pajamas or just his shirt
we can watch movies all day with his hand over me
small or deep kisses anytime whenever
calls to say they miss you because they did not see you last night
eats out of the box and drinks wine from the bottle on lazy nights with me.
says they love me sincerely and I see it in their eyes
I do not know how long I have got here.
so a fast love is all I have time for
meet me, hear me, know me, understand me and love me quickly
a fast love is all I have got time for
Apr 5, 2018
Apr 5, 2018 at 2:02 AM UTC
You have come a long way dear child
Though you may not see it, you belong
Your dreams and aspirations, you're living them
Right now, even in this very moment
That which you have lost is not all gone
for at one stage you had gained it,
it will remain forever in you, you
yes you, open your mind to new possibilities
the world is full of them, them
The highs and lows of everyday may shape who you are
but don't loose yourself in them
Always aspire to achieve greatness
You have yourself and only yourself to compete with
So rise up as you always do
Those thoughts you have, those ideas you have,
those are not illusions, infact they are more real than your reality
Oh dear child, you were not born just to dream,
child you were born to live them
Everyday is a journey, but know this,
nothing remains the same forever, so take it as it comes
Trials may come, peace, joy, happiness, even love too
but all in its own time,
Busy as a bee you may be, do take time to listen to the wind
Don't just learn to dance in the rain but stop and read
the stories left behind by footsteps in the mud
yes, mud, she was your friend at 5, she let you mould her
into cups, cakes even houses too
but oh child she was inturn molding you
She became a doorway to what you have now learnt to call your imagination
Free and wild like a stallion in the desert, she does not want to be tamed
dear child, so why are you trying to conform?
that which you think and dream off, make it a reality
It's already in YOU.
May 18, 2015
May 18, 2015 at 4:36 PM UTC
Most days I am not sure you exist.
And the days I do, I still don't believe in your potential to be any different from me.
I hope you stop forgiving people so easily.
Learn to make them work to remain in your life,
Don't just hand back the keys to the dysfunctional house you call your heart.
I hope that someday, someone proves worthy of all the kindness you're given.
If you are real, if I really can make the necessary changes to become you,
Know that I am sorry.
Truly, deeply sorry for all the unnecessary trouble I put you through.
Perhaps I'll stop getting high and give up drinking to forget so much,
Maybe then you'll have a fighting chance.
And if I don't, know I am sorry for this too.
Whatever you do, or have done in your life,
I hope you don't forget about the people who got you there,
Who helped you get through everything.
Hopefully one day we'll believe in the magic of love again.
I'm sick of bleeding out old wounds.
Future me, whom ever you may be,
if you are lucky enough to get out of this pit,
out of your terrible eternal nightmare,
please never come back.
No matter how much the night feels like warm velvet,
Not even when the drinks are free and pills are easy.
Run from me, your past.
Try to be happy.
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 11:29 PM UTC