#excuse
It's an external fuse that's lit
And ignites the internal hate and abuse
I put up a respectable fight
But at the end of the night
I always wonder, "what's the use?"
Now I have to come up with an excuse
For being me,
For being what you see
But I've run out of preprogrammed lines
Who I really am is already set in everyone's minds
I stand in fresh sand
The oceans tides has taken with it all of the lines
Rendering me lost
Is what I've paid anywhere near the actual cost?
When is it okay to say
Maybe this life is a loss...
©2025
Jun 24, 2025
Jun 24, 2025 at 12:55 AM UTC
Let us account our idled word,
indeed seek science...
reason debt, duty to be,
did he say. raison d' etre?
no.
he said reason debt, I heard
reason
call out debt, or was it doubt?
I heard called out,
doubt the difference a day makes
in reality,
the world of you and me,
the strangest sort of sapient beings
to ever
exist, we survived, so far… is that
reasonable?
Whom do I owe for my survival, so far?
Say you know, I'll say
mebbe so, if your ideal surviva-babble
possible ever, after,
exists,
is there a place where evil is punished,
for being known in all the common
ways we think, lies we believe,
good for nothing pure
evil, imaginary, mirror neuron firing signals
to the glands
from the guts to each
knot of knowing relaying response
to the noise - cries of havoc,
from any war fought on TV2021, the
recommending AI we love to trust,
with knowing
just
what we needed to know, to make up a mind
on matters pertaining
to you and the others who may be unaware, inactive,
untriggered by the terror,
not entertained by walking dead, but by the spirit
of the characters, or
character of the spirits, in other words, these
attention
holding cells for arrested development, idle words,
un-read, lines
unready for the dam that broke.
-live 'n'learn-
It takes more than seventy years to learn if ai
was right, when I surrendered, of my own free will,
made friends, and lovers, of
those who hated my idea,
peace, at any price.
Love your enemy - ha! Ha! Karate HA!
What fool would give ….
GAME STOP!... wow.
reason for the faith, as previously defined,
my way,
with hubris, in the face of the sharpest minds
opposing my singularity of being being
my own, in fact, my only
own thing, my own
reason to be.
- a hermit heretic idea virus modeled
- on the good wise *** archetype,
- the guy open to the guiding mind,
- through a refined Turrets connector, receives this
- crazy message to the hero of your story
So you could read this and run on,
for a long time, knowing agottamighty in d'vita
gotcha
best interests in mind.
- iron butterfly, rusty, but for the drum solo,
- that makes a mind dance again
What can be shaken, may be shaken,
or stirred,
swirled round and round within
gravity, at the mortal scale,
one more time.
-----------------
Oct 21, 2024
Oct 21, 2024 at 1:59 PM UTC
You make me feel like I'm...
A test dummy
A punching bag
An excuse
The reason
The fault at fault
Wrong
The wrong one
A mistake,
Possibly your biggest ever
The bet you now wouldn't take
The "if only I hadn't..."
Bad in hindsight
A wrong you had to right
The time that's never right
Time you'll never get back
Someone you need to get over,
Move on from
And leave in the past
The pain in your a§§
The last time
Never gonna happen again
Someone who benefited from you being in the wrong state of mind
Your weak moment
Your young and dumb years, if you will
...shall I go on?
©2024
Jun 13, 2024
Jun 13, 2024 at 1:37 PM UTC
Don't make a excuse ...
who weaves this nostalgia for you ...
in the corners of my soul ...
and every parts ...
at my heart's wall ...
O a far away lady ...
who is the Cause for this love in my heart ...
who are you madam ...
to make from me ...
crazy poet ...
writes words ...
through the air ...
even my pen ...
got crazy ...
to reach ...
the end of sky ...
O ma'am...
a woman from another world ...
stole me from my world ...
to put me in the field of madness ...
where i lost my world ...
where i see nothing ...
only you ...
who you are ...
to stole me ...
with no ask ...
please say ...
don't make a excuse ...
just say what runs ...
into your heart ...
hazem al ...
Aug 14, 2021
Aug 14, 2021 at 4:45 AM UTC
I gotta forgive they say.
I better let go they say.
I gotta give you another effing chance they say.
Say I need to try to re-unremind myself that you re-snatched my heart out
And watched it dangle.
I Re-say you re-re-snatched my heart out.
And watched it dangle.
I screamed "stop it!"
You watched it dangle.
I hollered for help.
You watched it dangle.
I mentioned my God-given rights.
You watched it dangle.
Next you manipulated & twisted the textual truth into a noose and... you...
You watched it dangle.
Now you want another millionth chance:
A public truce
You & your sorry excuse
For no apology
You! Center stage,
Aaaged in your stance
You extend your hand
I watch it dangle
Jan 31, 2021
Jan 31, 2021 at 2:17 AM UTC
we rarely talk about it
until we forget
hush
we rarely talk about it
until silence kills the night
hush
let’s have amnisia
everything will be fine
Sep 8, 2020
Sep 8, 2020 at 1:46 PM UTC
Thrill of luck.
You pay for fun
But you cannot turn
Just return and try
Again and again
Never satisfyed.
You pay to lose
But you ran out excuses
Aug 17, 2020
Aug 17, 2020 at 4:40 AM UTC
I have no mood
Such a simple excuse
But it holds so much truth
We have all used this once
Have had friends understand it
It is occassionally considered rude
But is better than an elaborate lie
I have no mood
And aint that the ******* truth
Jun 7, 2020
Jun 7, 2020 at 1:16 AM UTC
And after all
Honestly
You deserve
Everything
That close
Where everything
Starts
With a whisper
And ends
With a whisper
No excuse
A gift of life
With
The right one
Mar 11, 2020
Mar 11, 2020 at 5:58 AM UTC
A thousand reasons I should go
I should leave you behind
Know it's unhealthy
The way
I am unable to get you out of my mind
Believe when I tell you
In moments I could disappear
Wouldn't see me anymore
If so but I'd still be near
We are soulmates I am positive
Am drawn to your energy
Love is what we share
Friends is what we'll always be
Regardless of what happens between us
Always want to be part of your life
Are meant to be together somehow
Even if not as husband and wife
We will be there for each other
As lovers or best friends
Til the entire universe implodes
Time itself meets it's end
You will always have a place in my bed
As well as a place in my heart
You'll always be my first choice
Even if you decide to depart
The cruel reality of life and love
Is sometimes it doesn't work
It is tragic but if you care too much
Often you'll end up getting hurt
Something creates chasms between us
Drugs
Family
Or maybe thoughts
So tired of getting my heart broken
Just attempting to connect the dots
Consumed by dumb insecurity
Troubling my true perception
Causing me to worry about
You
Your possible deception
My fear drives a wedge between
As a result I only accuse
Both want to wipe slates clean
Tried but what is the use?
To keep living like this is madness
Punishing our hearts with pain
Friends warn me to be careful
All think I'm insane
Some might label me stupid
Foolish and naive
Just because I tolerate your ********
Does not mean that I believe
Different excuse each time you call
Letting me know you've let me down
You disappoint me over and over
Love is the reason I stay around
Feb 19, 2020
Feb 19, 2020 at 8:17 AM UTC
The Mirror, that lie
Let me see myself
Pardon, your eyes
Feb 7, 2020
Feb 7, 2020 at 9:27 AM UTC
When I excuse
my faults
I lose the opportunity
to improve myself.
When I accept
my faults
and evaluate my self
I can then
improve my self
towards the wisdom and virtue
I need
to achieve optimal joy and happiness.
Jul 31, 2019
Jul 31, 2019 at 9:58 PM UTC
I wanna make it simple
But it ain't
Though it is.
I thought it'd be easier
If I stopped
But I kept going.
I tried to correct the course
But no excuse
Could be admitted.
So I keep on writing
Just to seem
Like I knew it all along.
Jul 16, 2019
Jul 16, 2019 at 4:25 PM UTC
Truly, I feel most peaceful when
My face is attempting to go
Through the floor, smushed up
Against the little fibers containing treasures from last week’s late night snack
Before being swept away by the tornado known as the vacuum cleaner
I somehow really do like it
My stomach being repelled with every breath gives me the mistaken belief
That there’s no need for my exercise routine or that
I won’t be regretting the chocolate hazelnut churros and chocolate ice cream I indulged in
“Just this once”
My new favorite three words
But wait,
It’s not new
Simple the same old story repeating itself again
And again
And again
Jun 7, 2019
Jun 7, 2019 at 6:50 PM UTC
These days, the sun sleeps against
a wistful twisting of violet blue.
Pretention? Brake pad. You
told me that
my cadence is lyrical,
so, which is it, Mister?
I know myself to hell.
The mistake I keep making
is letting another tell
me they know me
just as well.
I mean, maybe.
I mean, maybe.
-- though, the more often you say it,
I can't help but think that the odds
come up in your favor ever less.
I know myself to hell.
The mistake I keep making
is letting another tell
me they know me
just as well.
May 6, 2019
May 6, 2019 at 9:22 PM UTC
your past is not an excuse for your actions
yet it is an explanation
Mar 21, 2019
Mar 21, 2019 at 5:11 PM UTC
I want to be good
I want to be smart
I want to be kind
Clever, beautiful, healthy...
But I also want
I want to destroy
I want to be stupid
I want to be reckless
Sick, twisted, crazy...
I want to be pure
But I want to do whatever
Will clothe me in dirt
I want to be responsible
But I chase anything
That offers a sweet excuse
I want to be respectable
To be strong and stand tall
But I want to drown
In anything intoxicating
To let me stumble and stagger
In ignorance and bliss
And all of this
Makes me so crazy
I want to be angry
I want to
SCREAM
Mar 5, 2019
Mar 5, 2019 at 4:21 PM UTC
You light me up like a Christmas tree
And I feel so juvenile
But I'm too chicken to say how I feel
Because I'm still in denial
Because there's so many words you've said
And I've wondered if they were for me
With so many words that I've said
You were always listening
Because I remember my words
And it appears you did too
You're a very good listener
For someone I've rarely spoken to
Because I'm running towards you
But is this the right way to go
I'm chasing after someone
Who I don't even know
We're flirting with the line
And I'm on the edge
Are you going to cross
Or stay true to your pledge
Jan 17, 2019
Jan 17, 2019 at 4:14 PM UTC
Being around you makes me happy
It also makes me sad
In the shadow of indecision
Burned both hearts bad
Deeply scorched scornful words
Into space inside your tender chest
My head cluttered, no room to think
Strong arms where my fears are pressed
I hope you will be okay if I go
You give no reason to leave
Staying because I own no excuse
That is not how love should be
Nov 5, 2018
Nov 5, 2018 at 9:30 AM UTC
The tissues I have cried into
are my excuses,
to hide the clutter of calls and love I forgot to return.
Sometimes it is too late to clear the mess I made.
It is more difficult to retain my will to clean it all up,
which sort of made me guilty
of creating another sad person.
But what is another tissue in another sea.
Everyone dreams of sailing into a brighter morning
leaving behind their darkness in another’s mind.
What if I am as selfish as them.
What is another ship, another selfish wish
amidst thousand such others-
all stranded on a water-less heart
all looking for a flood, instead of directions.
Sep 26, 2018
Sep 26, 2018 at 6:26 AM UTC