#emotionallyconstipated

I tend to forget that the pen is mightier than the sword When I sit down to write, there's a filter with what is and isn't okay to say It can't be too dark but it can't be too happy either No, that's not like you. Erase it all Maybe try a different approach The filter encases me into social rules and status Don't interrupt even if you have something you really wanna share Make sure you smile at everyone because it'll make their day Only talk when spoken to Agree with everything they say because they are right The filter transfers to a physicality stance You're too fat Maybe a shake diet for a year could help, but probably not Don't eat for the next few days Oh look, your face broke out again. Put on a ton of makeup and maybe it'll look better My filter has enveloped me into a completely white padded cell with no doors and no windows I myself am wearing a white jumpsuit with a straight jacket as an accessory I am a prisoner to my filter

0

Nov 12, 2017

Nov 12, 2017 at 1:57 PM UTC

DeAnn

My Filter

I tend to forget that the pen is mightier than the sword When I sit down to write, there's a filter with what is and isn't okay to say It can't be too dark but it can't be too happy either No, that's not like you. Erase it all Maybe try a different approach The filter encases me into social rules and status Don't interrupt even if you have something you really wanna share Make sure you smile at everyone because it'll make their day Only talk when spoken to Agree with everything they say because they are right The filter transfers to a physicality stance You're too fat Maybe a shake diet for a year could help, but probably not Don't eat for the next few days Oh look, your face broke out again. Put on a ton of makeup and maybe it'll look better My filter has enveloped me into a completely white padded cell with no doors and no windows I myself am wearing a white jumpsuit with a straight jacket as an accessory I am a prisoner to my filter

18

I'm tired Of caring about others Neglecting myself Until I am almost nonexistent And then trying to find myself I'm tired Of getting hurt Giving myself away Until I am almost nonexistent And then having to pick up all the pieces I'm tired Of being lost Looking for all the answers Until I am overwhelmed And then I have to wait until someone else finds me, but they never do I'm tired Of not being allowed to cry Trying to express myself through other means Until I have been drained of all feelings And then I close myself in because I am afraid of pulling people in with me I'm tired Of being afraid

0

Nov 11, 2017

Nov 11, 2017 at 11:22 PM UTC

DeAnn

Tired

I'm tired Of caring about others Neglecting myself Until I am almost nonexistent And then trying to find myself I'm tired Of getting hurt Giving myself away Until I am almost nonexistent And then having to pick up all the pieces I'm tired Of being lost Looking for all the answers Until I am overwhelmed And then I have to wait until someone else finds me, but they never do I'm tired Of not being allowed to cry Trying to express myself through other means Until I have been drained of all feelings And then I close myself in because I am afraid of pulling people in with me I'm tired Of being afraid

22

I could pretend to be happy and smile at everything But that would be a lie So why do I do it? There's no reason for me to be happy at everything, But I don't want people to know my suffering So why do I hide it? I can't seem to reach out to people But that makes me alone So who can I trust?

0

Nov 9, 2017

Nov 9, 2017 at 12:17 AM UTC

DeAnn

But So

I could pretend to be happy and smile at everything But that would be a lie So why do I do it? There's no reason for me to be happy at everything, But I don't want people to know my suffering So why do I hide it? I can't seem to reach out to people But that makes me alone So who can I trust?

9

When you try to hold it in And you can't Trying to understand why But you can't Wanting answers that will never be spoken But why Trying to get past the grief The heavy pain in your chest The emptiness in your heart Putting on a mask for the world to see Putting your fingers in your mouth A subtle hint that you're lying Deceiving Holding something back Something painful But you can still see the light at the end of the tunnel You just can't reach it

0

Apr 3, 2017

Apr 3, 2017 at 2:16 PM UTC

DeAnn

The Mask

When you try to hold it in And you can't Trying to understand why But you can't Wanting answers that will never be spoken But why Trying to get past the grief The heavy pain in your chest The emptiness in your heart Putting on a mask for the world to see Putting your fingers in your mouth A subtle hint that you're lying Deceiving Holding something back Something painful But you can still see the light at the end of the tunnel You just can't reach it

17