#embarrasment
I wish I felt like clarity and nothingness, or that intangible vapour like stuff which comes off of a power washer at a car wash
in a dark car park
the car's owner absent, away shopping
You were the one who put your fingers in my mouth
I'm supposed to be embarrassed and disappointed
I am both
I suspect you are a good person
you have a sister
who you love
I bet you are different when you go home
I bet you are nice
I hope they know what you do
You are a classical easy ****
But I'm just syllables and escort clothing
For a while I quite liked that
In fact I'm proud
My friends find it funny
You liked the smell of my hair
And gradually I'm piecing these notes together
I think that if I had more crushed up note pages grinding into your back
You would have remembered me
I'm pretending that if you taste that scent again, you'll know
I still have some of you attached to the garments at the bottom of a full laundry basket
Mar 5, 2014
Mar 5, 2014 at 11:49 AM UTC
in the emptiness
of all these lonely nights
i drift slowly to the planet in my heart
and its knock
knock
knocking
still mock
mock
mocking
and stop
stop
stopping
my every line
heels clicking
glasses chinking
the whisper of a forgotten light
flickers on and off
an endless chime
I just let the ringing echo
and in my mind
the sounds of my planet are the only peace I can find
so fluttering heart
un-still and unrefined
crack open and splutter onto the duvet
and let me listen to the sounds of the planet inside
May 23, 2023
May 23, 2023 at 2:23 PM UTC
You demanded me to rip a bandaid off an open wound while it was still bleeding. Blood soaked and dried, stuck to my body, staining my curtains, clothes, pillows. Not even being able to lay my head down without being reminded of blood spilt without a shield to save myself from the pestilence the world holds. Rotten, stiff air infecting us all slowly.
Jul 5, 2018
Jul 5, 2018 at 5:44 AM UTC
I don't like it when people fight.
My mom and dad do every night.
I lie in bed and pretend to be asleep.
My mom looks in; I don't make a peep.
Sometimes I wish I didn't live here.
I'm a little girl who only feels fear.
When I go to school I put on a big smile.
I pretend things are fine, and it works for a while.
But there are days when I am very sad.
When I've been called names and told that I'm bad,
Then I keep to myself and hide my shame,
For I don't really know who to blame.
I'm scared to have friends come over to play.
I never dare ask if my friends can stay,
For I don't know when they will start.
I'm just a little girl trying to be smart.
The dishes breaking, the yelling, the shouting.
Their fights are ever so mounting.
I'm the innocent victim who feels rejected
Instead of feeling loved and respected.
But maybe if I wish really hard
The memories will ease and I won't be scarred.
When I awaken, maybe my wish will come true.
Out with the old and in with the new.
A new way of living for my parents and I.
There'll be no more tears for the little girl to cry,
But it's really hard on children to grow up like this.
They'll look back on a childhood they really missed.
Jun 23, 2025
Jun 23, 2025 at 12:50 PM UTC