#eatingdissorder
Em frente do espelho
Em um surto de lucidez, penso
O que foi que eu fiz com meu corpo?
Ele era tão saudável
Mas eu não me amava antes
E também não me amo agora
Eu lembro de desejar a todo custo
“Emagrecer até morrer”
E é essa frase que corre em minha mente
Quando eu sinto minha visão escurecer
Eu lentamente estou morrendo
Em frente ao espelho, me pergunto
Se era essa a minha vontade
então por que eu estou tão assustada?
Jan 3, 2022
Jan 3, 2022 at 12:55 PM UTC
I've gotten so used to loosing,
That now when I take,
The more my stomach waits.
Waits for me to fill this hole,
That I've created over months.
But I can no longer take.
Because the more I take,
The more I gain.
And the more I gain,
The more I hate,
Hate myself for taking the plate.
Apr 28, 2021
Apr 28, 2021 at 1:41 AM UTC
she's behind every smile
saying "this is what it takes"
she's behind every smile
both real and fakes
she holds my hand
when my mind becomes weak
she holds my hand
telling me not to eat
i'm tied to Ana
by the lies i've listened to
i'm tied to Ana
there's nothing i can do
i fade away piece by piece
as Ana watches on
i fade away piece by piece
soon it won't be long
maybe i'm addicted
to the lies Ana shares
maybe i'm addicted
maybe only Ana cares
can't let her go
i only wish i could
can't let her go
heaven knows i should.
Jul 16, 2014
Jul 16, 2014 at 3:43 AM UTC
I felt so alone
No one seemed to care
I went for a walk
And thought about calories
That was odd for me
Then You came
And pushed my food away
You told me you'd make me perfect
Your name was Ana
You put me through hell
Made me question everyone
And every little freaking thing
I started to obsess
Over the number on the scale
I stopped eating food
And started eating numbers
I had to punish myself
When I went even a decimal
Of a calorie
Over my limit
That's what you trained me to do
You sentenced me to the gym
Made me lie to my family
And even my friends
Put me in a hospital
But still I loved you
And honestly, I still do
I won't stop counting calories
I had at most, 1194 today
while only burning 1500
evil little calories
I might drop an ounce
But I'll keep working
Because I have you
My dear friend Ana
The only one who cares
Jun 15, 2014
Jun 15, 2014 at 11:01 PM UTC