#doingmybest
I’m seventeen and already exhausted
in ways adults don’t seem to notice.
I wake up tired,
go to bed tired,
carry the day in my shoulders
like it’s something I forgot how to set down.
I’m trying.
In quiet ways.
In showing up when I don’t want to.
In holding myself together at school.
In doing homework with a brain that won’t slow down.
In learning how to breathe through stuff
no one sees.
And then you say,
“Try harder.”
Like I haven’t been giving everything I have.
Like effort has a volume ****
I just forgot to turn up.
Like I’m choosing to struggle.
You don’t see the nights
I stare at the ceiling replaying mistakes.
You don’t see how much courage it takes
just to keep going some days.
You don’t hear the way my heart talks to itself
when I feel like I’m falling behind.
I want to scream,
This is me trying.
This is me learning how to grow
without breaking apart.
This is me doing my best
with what I have right now.
I don’t need pressure.
I don’t need comparisons.
I need patience.
I need someone to notice
that I haven’t given up.
So when you tell me to try harder,
please understand—
I already am.
And sometimes surviving the day
is the hardest part.
Feb 5
Feb 5, 2026 at 12:32 PM UTC
i wonder
what you ever did
with all of the friendship bracelets
we had
i still wear them
it hurts too much to take them off
i wonder
if you still remember our secret handshake
that we made up
in the 2nd grade
and kept using
for years
i still practice it
with my tear-stained reflection
in the broken mirror
i wonder
if you still think about me
as often as i think about you
i keep going back
to our old, happy memories
the ones that you (probably) forgot
i sure hope not
because those are the memories
i can't get myself to throw away
i wonder
what you did
with all the pictures of me on your phone
did you delete them
or do you just keep them there
leaving them alone,
just like you did with the real me
i can't believe
that i managed
to cut your face out of a photo
a hole of emptiness-
resembling the one in my soul
i really miss you
but friends grow apart, i guess
Dec 6, 2024
Dec 6, 2024 at 12:13 AM UTC
independent
all alone
in this country
we call home
alone
but not lonely
peaceful
... if only
through true struggles and true strife
the awful people take our lives
from rocky peaks to desert sands
a trustworthy hope; a nation's plan
we will make it
Dec 5, 2024
Dec 5, 2024 at 5:48 PM UTC
a six day war
fight for our lives
form our hives
pray for our wives
a six day war
get our land
let our boots sink in sand
and reach for
that savior of a hand
a six day war
lose our hope
try to cope
we
will
win
the
war
Dec 5, 2024
Dec 5, 2024 at 11:27 AM UTC
i want to
c r y
but i am in a crowded room
i hold back
t e a r s
but they fall anyway
now i am
a l l a l o n e
but i cant get the tears to come out
i want to
c r y
but i cant
not at all
Dec 3, 2024
Dec 3, 2024 at 8:59 PM UTC