#diets
When I wiggle, wiggle wiggle,
People giggle, giggle, giggle.
In the middle, middle, middle,
I'm not so little, little, little.
When I jump, jump, jump,
My big old **** **** ****
My rear end **** **** ****
Goes bump, bump, bump.
Once skinny as a rail
I’m more like a whale.
Because of what I did
Ever since I was a kid.
Any old kind of candy
To me was simply dandy.
Follow me around and
I’d eat it by the pound.
Mom would bake, bake, bake.
By belly would shake, shake shake.
I couldn’t flounce, flounce, flounce
My gut would bounce, bounce, bounce.
Now I’m round, round, round,
To the ground, ground, ground.
I eat just like a pig, pig, pig,
That’s why I’m so big, big, big.
Once skinny as a rail
I’m more like a whale.
Because of what I did
Ever since I was a kid.
Any old kind of candy
To me was simply dandy.
Follow me around and
I’d eat it by the pound.
When some say diet, diet, diet,
I reply to them quiet, quiet, quiet.
Every time I try it, try it, try it.
My body doesn’t buy it, buy it, buy it.
So i just live for lunch, lunch, lunch.
I love to eat a bunch, bunch, bunch,
And I have a basic hunch, hunch, hunch,
The same will go for brunch, brunch, brunch!
Jan 19, 2017
Jan 19, 2017 at 5:34 PM UTC
your brain is obese
it's 60 percent fat
and a quarter of that mess
is cholesterol - and that's bad
like everyone's brain
although I have to ad
mine is 40 percent lean
so I can sell you my diet
of raw fish.. lentils.. beans
and the wisdom of this poet
on his fast track brain train
a thin title to start...
“How Can I Be So Mean?”
Aug 2, 2014
Aug 2, 2014 at 12:21 AM UTC
Government says
There's biscuits in your cupboard
But you can't have them
There's oven chips in your fridge
But you're not allowed those
There's a pie in your oven
But you shouldn't have that either
But here's an apple, they say
I'm allergic to apples
Here's a banana
Allergic to those, too
But you like blueberries
Yes. I love blueberries
And you like Papaya
Yes
And Mango
Yes, I love all of those things
Then why don't you have one
I will
When?
When I've won the lottery
Why can't you eat them now
Because...Em.
Capitalism
Aug 6, 2015
Aug 6, 2015 at 9:16 PM UTC
I know I shouldn't
But I must
The craving
It is just too much
The taste of sugar on my tongue
All I need is just one
To feed my desire
To fuel my fire
A little taste of chocolate
To send me on a tasty rocket
Maybe a spoon of caramel
It won't be very harmful
And a perfect little cookie
To make me a diet rookie
Just a taste
Just a lick
Anything to make me tick
So who cares, if I'm on a diet
No
Not again
No more laughs
And painful attacks
No more hurting
And friend deserting
It's not worth it
If he won't love me a bit
Not with every thing I have eaten
It's not worth being beaten
By me
Because he doesn't love the way everyone will see
No more sugar
No more sweets
Only vegetables
And green beans
But the taste
No
But the smell
No
But the emptiness, I just can't quell
Oh well
Diets are for losers anyway
Like me
May 7, 2014
May 7, 2014 at 10:25 PM UTC
We all know what we should do!
Eat little
Eat often
Eat green
Eat three meals a day and nothing in-between.
Portion your
Carbs
Fats
Vegetables and
Proteins.
On a small sectional dinner plate.
Designed for your ease, alerting you to how much you ate!
A smorgasbord it is not!
It's restrictive and brings no joy. It is not the equivalent of a board game, book, or toy.
One night out with friends, and the plan is forgotten.
I will have garlic mushrooms and cheesy bread to start.
We order a bottle of sauvignon blanc.
For mains, of course, it's has to be battered fish and chips for me.
Ooh, and that chocolate cake is looking too temptingly.
As friends, we are in this together, and we all agree it's just this one time, as we order another bottle of wine.
The next morning, I step on the scale and wail. "How did that happen? It was just one time. One piece of cake, one glass of wine."
Vowing to myself to get back on track.
I open up my food app.
I record my
Carbs
Vegetables
Fats and Proteins
Determined to become slender and lean.
Make myself fit into that new pair of jeans.
Today begins a new day.
And that is pretty much all I have to say.
Feb 3, 2025
Feb 3, 2025 at 1:59 PM UTC