#depressionawareness
I have always been a child of the sea
With nowhere else to flee
So I cried myself an ocean
Made of the same salt and sorrows
But this year I've raised the tides
Not deep enough to swim, but just
enough to drown
And there's nowhere left to hide
But in the ocean that I've cried
Feb 15
Feb 15, 2026 at 1:34 AM UTC
In the quiet of the night, when darkness whispers near, A battle rages deep within, unseen by those who care. The shadows speak of ending, of finding sweet release, Yet in my heart, a voice resounds, a plea for inner peace.
Courage isn’t loud, it doesn’t always roar, Sometimes it’s a whisper, a knock upon my door. A gentle push to stay, to see another day, To find the strength within me, to keep the dark at bay.
Each morning is a victory, each breath a hard-won fight, In the face of haunting thoughts, I seek the smallest light. Resilience grows in silence, in battles fought alone, A testament to strength, in moments rarely shown.
I talk to my reflection, to the eyes that bear the pain, Reminding them of worth, of what there is to gain. “You are more than shadows, more than darkened skies, You hold a world of purpose, within those tear-streaked eyes.”
The road is often lonely, the climb steep and long, Yet within my soul, a melody, a half-remembered song. A song of hope and future, of dreams yet to be, A promise of the beauty, in what my life can be.
When thoughts of ending surface, when despair takes its hold, I summon up my courage, let my inner strength unfold. For every tear that’s fallen, for every silent scream, I anchor to the knowledge, that life is worth the dream.
The strength to stay is quiet, it’s found in every breath, In choosing life and love, in stepping back from death. It’s in the daily struggle, the moments of reprieve, In finding joy in small things, in learning to believe.
I find my worth in kindness, in love I give and share, In the laughter of a friend, in moments free of care. My purpose is in living, in taking one more stride, In knowing I am valued, with nothing left to hide.
So here’s to all the warriors, who fight the silent fight, Who choose to stay each day, who seek the healing light. For in the act of staying, a courage fierce and true, We find our strength within us, and life begins anew.
The strength to stay is powerful, a force that’s deep and strong, It’s in the heart’s resilience, in finding where we belong. With each step taken forward, with every new day’s start, We build a life worth living, with courage in our heart.
Nov 21, 2025
Nov 21, 2025 at 10:30 AM UTC
No it actually doesn’t get better
I really used to think it did
But my days now are darker than they were 10 years ago
When I tried to end my life
Once
Twice
Three times
And I still think about it
Just now I feel more selfish
Yeah I am loved
Good god I am so ******* loved
That’s why I can’t
But if I were to tell you that ******** about every day “being a blessing!!”
I’d be lying through my teeth
I hate it here
I hate me here
I hate here
I have everything that could make me happy
And I’m not
So no it actually doesn’t get better
And I still think about it
Just now I’m too tired.
May 20, 2025
May 20, 2025 at 4:54 PM UTC
In a world where we feel forsaken and abandoned,
A barren land bleaked with loneliness, forgotten, forlorn
A life so hopeless and full of desolation.
A whole generation plagued by an epidemic called depression.
An illness that took the lives of many.
Yet still misunderstood, dismissed as laziness aplenty.
Loving parents lose daughters and sons,
Still no cure, incomprehensable not even one can understands.
They've scoured books, devoured dictionaries, seeking words to describe how they really feel,
Yet none can mend a soul like them, too broken to heal, too shattered to fix it still.
But then you came, a beacon so bright,
on this dim and narrow path I called life,
A glimmer of hope in a world so dark, where it all seems filled with wrath and strife.
Be strong and make sure to guard your light,
Growing it ever more intense —impairing a sight,
Let it shine brighter than any stars and sun,
Help them light up their way till the darkness around them are gone.
For souls that dwells in void like mine,
I cherished the warmth it gives and provides,
In a world not built for us to live, rather just merely for us to survive.
Yet remain cautious of those who'd dim your glow,
Leaving you cold, it's unkind — I know.
But keep your flames burning with passion,
Nurture it, share it wisely like a precious ration,
For your light is a beacon of hope,
Guiding those lost in darkness, away from ending their lives hanging on a rope.
Jan 14, 2025
Jan 14, 2025 at 10:54 AM UTC
is he sighing too heavy?
is he furthering himself from you?
does he seem like he's lost in thought?
do you think he's numb?
do you think he's in pain?
you say "notice the signs"
and all the signs are right here.
so, why aren't you noticing them?
i thought you would notice this time.
after all, you've seen them so many times
but you didn't notice them before,
so, why would you suddenly notice now?
Dec 8, 2022
Dec 8, 2022 at 10:06 AM UTC
My dog-soul forgets to feed
and starves black,
paces circles for a bed
and with dead weight,
settles
thought and action,
usually smitten with intricacies,
are quietly smothered to nothing
a flat purgatory
scored with white noise, overcast
rendered in a pauper’s palette
on a canvas with no edge
ticks remain untocked
until at some distance
a mechanism is rewound
and a leash jangled
for an ear to lazily lift again
Oct 10, 2020
Oct 10, 2020 at 8:17 AM UTC
Three AM awake, aching with lateness
wrestling alone
even if a significant other is next to you
or little breaths flutter in next rooms
Shadow boxing ridiculous odds
in a world and heart full
of treacle thick worries
weighting your punches ineffectual
just like in the fear-fever dreams
that woke you
You skirt the maw below
resting place of your almighty failures
as the sick orange glow
breaches curtains and makes
familiar shapes judgmental
tut tut tutting at your uselessness
Here, you are defenceless
Here, the black thoughts insinuate,
find cracks to prise and plant suggestions
of a better world without you in it:
the limit of you
Dig deep, my human kin
quietly get up,
make a cup of tea,
write a message or two
to yourself, or for others later
Bide and wait
for the mute loved heaviness of sleep to return
or the welcome thinness of morning light
to wash the darkness back
In the new day, reach out,
with steady voice or bubble-snot,
be heard and seen
by friends or strangers
and try to heal again
Oct 3, 2020
Oct 3, 2020 at 9:03 AM UTC
Malamig
Madilim
Mga tao'y natutulog nang mahimbing
Madaming pumapasok
Kahit walang pintuan
Mga problemang
Hindi naman kailangan
Ngunit sila'y pumapasok nalamang
Wala man lamang paalam
Ayoko silang maisip
Ayoko silang marinig
Ayoko silang makita
Ganito ba kasama ang mga problema?
Ako'y humihigop lamang ng kape
Habang nasa durungawan
Hindi ko kayang matulog nang mahimbing
Dahil sa mga problema sa buhay
Pero bakit pati ba naman sa gabi?,
Sa mapayapa na gabi
Pa kayo nagsipasok sa isipan ko
Ang gusto ko lang naman
Kahit minsan
Manahimik
Mapatahimik
Magpahinga
Mawala
Ang mga problema ko sa buhay
Habang gising lahat ng mga tao.
Feb 16, 2020
Feb 16, 2020 at 5:15 PM UTC
Have you ever self-destructed?
Said **** it to the world.
Left logic
locked away
until tomorrow.
Have you ever given up?
Thrown a tantrum
about your life.
Left gratitude
to grovel
at the door.
Have you ever realized later,
how blinding self-hate is?
How easily it tricks you
into believing,
you’re not worth
the love you’re given,
you have no love to give.
No wonder
you stay in bed
to ease the pain.
But trust me
I’ve laid in darkness,
wallowing in despair,
tried to warm,
my freezing heart
with heaps of blankets.
But I’ve learned
time and again,
when I emerge
from shifting shadows,
life is waiting
ever patient
as I learn,
how to see myself through eyes
with compassion
for healing wounds,
trusting
my beating heart
says I’m enough.
Nov 25, 2019
Nov 25, 2019 at 2:32 PM UTC
Please don’t tell me
“you’re too young
to be tired.”
I’ll be as tired
as I dang-we’ll please.
There are so many ways
to be “spent”
beyond what you see
physically—
weariness runs more
than skin-deep.
So don’t tell me how
you think I should feel,
because you could
never understand.
My brain, it thrums constantly
and drains me emotionally,
in ways that you
can’t fix with sleep.
A. I. Myles 18 June, 2o19 @athenaeumthoughts
Jun 18, 2019
Jun 18, 2019 at 9:23 PM UTC
Is this what “it” looks like?
The jumbled and frantic mess of
a wit
without constraint-
without silence,
calm, or congeniality?
Is this what it “feels” like?
A tornado of turbulent misconceptions,
strewn about
like leaves on the wind-
peppered with the biting
chill
of crisp droplets,
soaking through to skin and bone.
Is this “just how it goes”?
When the grey and black blanket of night
and sadness and just existential emptiness
cloud the sky.
When the darkness that surrounds encroaches,
blurring the point where the horizon
meets terra firma.
Would the power lines
connecting the neurological
pathways break?
Would the ceiling of introspection
fly off of the supports that so long
held it in place?
What is left when the
onslaught of the brain
brouhaha slows and only the
photographs, the memories linger;
when the dust of duress settles?
What follows when
the final downpour
of shattered expectations
fall,
leaving the silent and still
dejection
that comes at the end?
Is that the end?
Could I wipe the rain from my eyes,
to see the brightening of the day?
Could I see the illumination of the sun
and the clearing of the sky?
What about the curve of crystalline
precipitation, lingering in empyrean;
brimming with a wash of beauty
known only to those who behold it?
Is that the end?
When and what and
where is the end?
- A. I. Myles 30 May, 2019
May 31, 2019
May 31, 2019 at 5:02 PM UTC
Seems that ‘entertainment-sake’ started off with ease,
But now the pain is greater and it's hard to contain it.
Whatever need be said here's my attempt to say it,
I hope this doesn't leave me jaded,
Even more so than before, so, here’s the statement.
Like a disease, I maintain a deadly anger,
Just to appease the needs of basically strangers.
And when I can't breathe, they blame me for the strangulation,
And heave heaps of painstaking sensations
Upon me. And all I do is remain complacent, so they
Don't see the side of me I'm containing.
For now I'm safe from the day they find me hanging in the basement.
I need to save myself before it's too late to reclaim it.
I just hope these words are enough to make me complacent.
Embracing all evil things that bring me to the brink of insanity,
I’ll compose the fable, as much as I can purvey it.
Mar 31, 2019
Mar 31, 2019 at 3:44 PM UTC
This temple of sacrifice feeds sorrow aplenty,
To nurture its agonizing corruption.
It envelops your mind,
Breeds conformity, and peril unfolds.
The hourglass is broken, the sand was lost to conformity,
Becoming nothing more than a speck of dust in the rubble
On a sidewalk that leads the fool to paradise.
There he dwells with hopelessness,
Still waiting for the answer that he didn't hear.
The chilling sound of crushing metal was quite loud when the car radio shut off.
Mar 31, 2019
Mar 31, 2019 at 2:47 PM UTC
The other day I had the very same thought,
Just as I did the other times, however many;
A romantic-comedy kind of retrospect, if you will. We were selling out concert tickets to upholstery as the best, or at least most confident,
Karaoke duo to ever cross paths with a dashboard.
“When I'm gone just carry on, don't mourn, rejoice.”
Opera singers every other day...
Does the music still manifest within your nervous system?
Can you feel the sorrow pulse from the V - i resolution chord?
It's still screaming if you can't hear it.
...had I known then what I know now, well,
Perhaps this memory wouldn't hurt so ********* much.
It's hard to listen to music in the car anymore,
Well, nearly impossible most of the time.
It awakens sleeping demons that need not be bothered,
Their tails cut like a severed bond between two people who conquered tribulations far beyond the reach of the greatest evil imaginable,
Yet still lost control of ourselves from time to time.
The tires slid across the asphalt during that calm storm a few years back
“What’s in your head, zombie?”
Mar 31, 2019
Mar 31, 2019 at 2:41 PM UTC
*Intertwine my troubled mind
With simplicity and blind
Me from the morose truth of things
Be the very thing that brings
Out the best of this world so dark
Open up my heart and spark
Up a life that will be better
Than this listlessness I'm bound to weather
It's no secret that I'll miss
The comfort of my deep abyss
Though it's become so familiar to me
I've longed reach beyond and see
Things without the stormy haze
So ready to step out and blaze
A brand new path to feeling well
No longer do I wish to dwell
On everything that could go wrong
I understand that I am strong
Enough to handle this and in spite
of it all I'll be alright.*
Jul 21, 2016
Jul 21, 2016 at 10:28 PM UTC