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#darktimes
T-rust lost. I-ronically hopeful. R-espectfully alone. E-ndlessly worried. ***** promises.
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Sep 8, 2024
Sep 8, 2024 at 10:24 AM UTC
T-I-R-E-D
(PHASE -1) "Into the chaos I pummel, as the time gets tough, The responsibilities I bore now bigger than my ego, And I getting crushed under both. Trying to breathe in, Big gasps coming back empty, No support or help... Support being a fantasy as everyone's in the same boat. "My flaws", mock me as it pushes me deeper, Cutting me off from everyone I hold dear. The more I try to fix things, the worse it gets, Like a devil toying with my helplessness..." (PHASE-2) "No salvation, no outlet, Like bubbles filled with intensely compressed agony... I try to blow them away before they cloud my judgement, Alas a bit too late, for the damage has been done, The words that slipped down my tongue have already struck like lightening, Now there's no one remaining..." (PHASE-3) "Now that the bubbles have left, I see them shine in reflection of the devil's eyes, Oh, have Mercy! I have nothing left, Just guilt, remorse, increasing ever so severely. But like a child, the devil pops these bubbles compressed with agony, While I watch from a distance, The chaos whispers: "It's only the beginning"... ~
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May 21, 2021
May 21, 2021 at 2:40 AM UTC
Untitled #33
In these dark times, remember that you will feel sunlight on your skin once more. You will smell the heat and life of summer, you will feel grass underfoot. This will pass, you will love and live on.
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Nov 20, 2020
Nov 20, 2020 at 1:32 PM UTC
Remember
It has taken a few weeks to perfect your recipe A few more to taste it. The sadness on you has become your scent, lingering on your sheets, just like you. And its the same everyday, routine, until you’ve become a stereotype. You spend the whole day watching phone calls rise and fall like empires or forgotten cities. Like this, you want to be left alone To wonder why you’re alone. And so you seem to think about everything, yet nothing at all. And you like how it feels how the darkness is flirtatious. So you go another night, just another night. Manuel
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Nov 12, 2019
Nov 12, 2019 at 12:22 AM UTC
HOW TO BR DEPRESSED
will all spill alike One seeping into the other A symphony of chaos and darkness_ An order from prophecy; of disorder and a raised structure of destruction For the skies will be as earth_ Dusty and dead The earth, just as dead That everything in between Would be buried That everyone in between Would be buried alive in blood, fear and fumes
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Nov 11, 2019
Nov 11, 2019 at 2:40 PM UTC
BLOOD, FEAR AND FUMES
I’m a bystander In my own life I should’ve known better Then to think that I’ve changed That I can grown in my skin And be truly happy At the end of the day It all comes back To one definite conclusion That I am a passerby,a fading memory shoved into the back of the minds of others   Rotting ,smothered and suffocated by the dust of ignorance and the bliss I don’t experience I watch All I can do is watch I was born to be a helping hand and it’s all I can amount to My poor parents They didn’t deserve What did they do to deserve A child who would not amount to anything more ? A child who’s importance is limited to ‘et al’ and not the proud glorious name that overshadows it in front, sitting like a trophy on pieces of paper that control And hold power Over judgement calls and hierarchy The subtle hierarchy we pretend to shun but really We adore And we praise Because it keeps the inferior in place So the confident exceed the socks shoved underneath your bed The very ones which offered warmth In the darkest chapters of your book Sob silently As they stay still Alone Unnoticed Confused and left feeling used and ***** As they realise That you You’re perfectly fine Without them You never needed them That they were a mere stepping stone into the future you contemplated ending Of course you didn’t spare a thought To them It was wrong of me to think That I could ever amount to anything That I could build a name for myself and be happy Feel what it means to be alive Smile like a Cheshire Cat As I lay in euphoria Happy relationships and having friends who know so much about me I realise I don’t have to suffer alone But it’s a facade Behind the scenes They all draw lines You’re just another figure to add the picture You make their social life look stellar You’re just someone who helps them grow But what do you get in return? You’re recycled, battered and tired You have twisted and turned And sobbed uncontrollably to yourself At night Contemplating to end it all But no You wake up And manage to smile And lead them to victory As you burn into ashes the ignorant flame thrower who who forgot who helped ignite the flame who bathed in glory ran off as you a simple bystander never got the chance who could only dream of being happy withered and burnt to crisp
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Dec 31, 2018
Dec 31, 2018 at 11:05 AM UTC
bystander
I’m a bystander In my own life I should’ve known better Then to think that I’ve changed That I can grown in my skin And be truly happy At the end of the day It all comes back To one definite conclusion That I am a passerby,a fading memory shoved into the back of the minds of others   Rotting ,smothered and suffocated by the dust of ignorance and the bliss I don’t experience I watch All I can do is watch I was born to be a helping hand and it’s all I can amount to My poor parents They didn’t deserve What did they do to deserve A child who would not amount to anything more ? A child who’s importance is limited to ‘et al’ and not the proud glorious name that overshadows it in front, sitting like a trophy on pieces of paper that control And hold power Over judgement calls and hierarchy The subtle hierarchy we pretend to shun but really We adore And we praise Because it keeps the inferior in place So the confident exceed the socks shoved underneath your bed The very ones which offered warmth In the darkest chapters of your book Sob silently As they stay still Alone Unnoticed Confused and left feeling used and ***** As they realise That you You’re perfectly fine Without them You never needed them That they were a mere stepping stone into the future you contemplated ending Of course you didn’t spare a thought To them It was wrong of me to think That I could ever amount to anything That I could build a name for myself and be happy Feel what it means to be alive Smile like a Cheshire Cat As I lay in euphoria Happy relationships and having friends who know so much about me I realise I don’t have to suffer alone But it’s a facade Behind the scenes They all draw lines You’re just another figure to add the picture You make their social life look stellar You’re just someone who helps them grow But what do you get in return? You’re recycled, battered and tired You have twisted and turned And sobbed uncontrollably to yourself At night Contemplating to end it all But no You wake up And manage to smile And lead them to victory As you burn into ashes the ignorant flame thrower who who forgot who helped ignite the flame who bathed in glory ran off as you a simple bystander never got the chance who could only dream of being happy withered and burnt to crisp
Continue reading...
83
I want to leave It's better than being here No one will grieve Because they were never near Sometimes I want to let go You won't miss me either way Your a beautiful glow But I'm turning you into gray That is why I should leave Because I don't want you to turn into me
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Jan 15, 2018
Jan 15, 2018 at 8:36 PM UTC
Leave
My world is a ride, so strap yourself in. Theres no place to hide, you knew how it'd end. Say you've been here before, thats no suprise. The way them eyes look at me, have I met my demise? Your halo's not what it seems, what is this feeling? Your halo's not what it seems, why isn't it gleaming? I see it now, didn't notice it before. What i've already been through, you have and more. If I seem a bit weary, don't runaway. This is just the first time, I've met someone like me. Your halo's not what it seems, what is this feeling? Your halo's not what it seems, why isn't it gleaming? We'll face our demons tonight. We'll face our demons tonight. We'll face our demons tonight.(x2) How did it feel? To live in a place so cold. To have nowhere to call home. How did it feel? Are you free? As for me they haven't broke me yet As for you don't let them break you. As for me... I've been here before. My lifes a cold war. I've been placed in limbo, so i know whats in store. My guards always up, so i'll always be prepared. For I see the future ahead is nothing but despair. I tried to end it all but they didn't let me do it. I tried to end it all but I ******* think I blew it. I tried to end it all, tried to end it all, tried to end it all. We'll face our demons tonight...
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Nov 9, 2017
Nov 9, 2017 at 1:34 PM UTC
We'll Face Our Demons Tonight
The nightmare will not cease The nightmare will not relent The nightmare feasts On fear and regret
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May 11, 2017
May 11, 2017 at 2:14 PM UTC
Nightmare
We don't do no sticky we don't drink no colt's we higher than planes yet we don't do no smoke, these demons are twisted they know that we're gifted my bible its on me and my tongue goes ballistic, the truth is just stabbing but we don't stop clapping so many scriptures they think that we're stacking, born again so I gotta keep it holy, everyday I'm praising like a ceremony, In my dark days I'm praising, cause gods just amazing, demons just glazing, while my Angles just waiting, no time to be basic, sins have no traces, the lord is the greatest,
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Mar 3, 2017
Mar 3, 2017 at 2:17 PM UTC
The Zone/Dark Times
It's in our darkest times; Trapped inside the labyrinth Of our minds With the waves of sorrow Clawing out And flowing freely Down the engraved canyons Of our tired eyes That we discover The most beautiful Hidden corners Of our souls. l.v.s
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May 14, 2016
May 14, 2016 at 2:32 AM UTC
Hidden Corners
My friend is known by many names, some may love and some may hate. To see him you cannot sleep he's with me night and day and speaks when he wants,some may praise and some may boo. But he's my friend and together we may not lose One. Two. Three. Hear he comes nine on the dot and he greets all with open arms especially I who greets him as well, if you must know who he is, his name is very close to me and will be told to you. His name is... Darkness.
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Mar 18, 2016
Mar 18, 2016 at 2:54 PM UTC
My Friend
I went deep down in the hole, not physically but mentally, i just wanted to be alone. I couldnt find my words, to show people where i’d go, deep down in my emotions, where darkness was all there was to show. I searched frantically for guidance, to try and figure out if this is as far as i should go. I couldnt find the right time to let everybody know i could no longer reach my goals. I was tired and exhausted and i had nothing left, it’s sad i know. When you have these pent up feelings that you never learned to let go, they start eating at your insides until you say **** this, its time for me to go. life's better off without me, no one will ever even know, all the **** i had to go through, to pop this bottle and take it straight to the dome, pills that faded my vision, tears that flooded my throat. my eyes started to close, left with nothing but remorse. surprised to see light sneeking in through my eye lids, hours later, i was blessed i didnt go.
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Jan 27, 2016
Jan 27, 2016 at 1:56 AM UTC
Deep Down
Come to me come, wherever you are, When life is saddest, I'm never far, Where things are hard, and you have to choose, In the sing-songy home of the blues. Come to me come, whenever you hate, Yourself or others, it's not to late, I'll help you and listen, when you need it most, I'll hold you and bless you, and give you the most.
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Mar 3, 2015
Mar 3, 2015 at 8:35 AM UTC
Come To Me