#dahlya
A broken heart
Is filled with memories
Over your head
Like a stormy cloud
That even passing time
And new love
Can’t ever fully erase.
It comes at 2 a.m.
With your love asleep by your side
When the sound of their laugh
Fills your dreams
And worst nightmares.
It’s holding your lovers hard
And hating yourself
For the memories
Of the way their skin felt
Pressed against yours.
It’s going on a date
At a spot that used to be yours
And fighting the tears
As you remember the way they smiled
Each time you arrived.
It’s hearing their name
And feeling your heart stop
Because that word
Hasn’t left your lips
Since they left
And you found another.
It’s hearing your love
Humming your song
And remembering the way t felt
When you loudly belted it in the car together
With out a care in the world.
One never fully recovers
From a broken heart
But finds distractions
To cover the ache.
Apr 10, 2018
Apr 10, 2018 at 1:14 PM UTC
I never wanted to beg you to stay,
Or for it to come to this at all,
I wanted to be strong and cold.
But instead I lie in the dark
Scared that if you leave
A part of me will go with you.
But the train went off track
And unfortunately it seems
That there may be no turning back.
I didn’t expect our pieces
To be mixed up and broken,
I thought we would be one.
Now I greatly fear that this piece
Won’t ever returnLeaving me shattered on the floor.
I never wanted to beg you to stay,
But if you go
I want that piece of me back.
Apr 10, 2018
Apr 10, 2018 at 12:54 PM UTC
Once I was
On top of the world
Winning at a game
That I didn’t know
I was playing
As I was cheered on
By eager fans
Boosting my ego
Skipping through the fallen leaves
And slipping recklessly
Through the dangers
Life handed me
Knowing
That if I tripped
Someone was there
To catch me
Before I hit the pavement
But all at once
I fell from the nest
Feeling lost
When I scraped my knee
And nobody was there
Holding a band-aid
Ready to fix me
I wondered
Why it had been so easy
To fall hard
With no broken bones
Or ugly bruises
But nobody had told me
That when I used to fall
It had only been
From Dad’s shoulders
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:53 PM UTC
Filling the void
With strangers
In my bed
Searching for you
In their empty eyes
And drinking
Until last call
To ease the deep pain
But there is still a hole
That can only be filled
By letting go of you
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:50 PM UTC
I used to feel love
When the sun hit your face
Making your eyes glimmer
And my heart skip a beat
Now all I feel is emptiness
When we’re singing
In the car
To your favorite song
As you glance over
Like I gave you the world
Because you don’t know
That everything we have
Is about to be ruined
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:48 PM UTC
It hurt so much because it was an almost
We almost dated,
We could’ve fallen in love,
But we didn’t.
The hardest part is not knowing why.
Why did we drift apart?
Why wasn’t I good enough?
I deserved closure
But you couldn’t give me that.
You cross my mind
Every once in a while
And the wondering stings.
We will never know
What we could have been
And the unknown
Is what breaks me.
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:36 PM UTC
They say there’s beauty
In pain
But what is beautiful
About sitting on the bathroom floor,
Tears dripping
Into a puddle of blood,
And crying
Until your breath stops?
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:21 PM UTC
The night he took my innocence.
Was the night everything changed.
His shirt had been my favorite color,
A color that I can no longer bare to see.
His laugh,
So pure and happy,
Now haunts my every dream.
Those big blue eyes,
I had once looked at in awe,
Instill a new kind of fear in me,
Each time I see his eyes,
In a new friendly face.
The smell of his cologne,
I had loved so much
Is now revolting.
I was so naïve,
Young and trusting,
And he stole the small amount of innocence,
That I had left.
I will never trust again,
And I will always look behind me,
Fearing who may be there.
They told me it was my fault,
I should have listened,
To what I’d always been taught.
Cover up before you go out,
Don’t accept drinks from strangers,
Stay close to your friends.
But in the moment,
It all seemed right.
He was kind,
His eyes were warm,
And he paid attention to my every word,
Making me feel special,
A feeling that I wasn’t used to.
So like a child,
I trusted his charm.
I would give anything,
To take back my innocence,
To go back and try again.
To cover up,
To make my own drinks,
To stay close to my friends.
But I didn’t,
And I will never get back,
What I left in his bed.
I will keep the memory,
And the paralyzing fear,
Until I become stronger.
Strong enough to realize,
That It wasn’t my fault,
That there was nothing I could’ve done,
And that he was the only one that could’ve stopped it.
The night that ruined my life,
Was all in a stranger’s hands,
In his charming words,
And his breaking touch.
One day I will have the satisfaction of knowing,
That despite his efforts,
He didn’t ruin me,
I survived.
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:19 PM UTC