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i was young...       well, younger than now----    it was when it first struck me it struck me hard.           it struck me like reality...        but more like          reality when reality comes     in the face of your              family         all in chains...      then, reality looks like dreams altogether;             no not fantasy----               not exactly a nightmare either                          more like                   ----ecstasy-----       "you are a special weapon"            "something of great potential"         "and massive power"               "but you only have one shot"           mom always used to say.                    i even once thought                        she stashed some kind of            deathray or sting ray or something            in my arm----     ----it won't be the first thing                  she stuffed in me anyway...               i was eight years old when she                      finally continued the sentence.            before total silence.                   "make it count."        "cause whether you hit"          "or even if you miss..."            "you would be broken"             "shattered-----"             "torn to pieces-----"             "torn apart."                                  "so please"                                "don't"                         "break"                             "yourself"                                 "shooting"                                     "for"                       "nothing."                   she never taught me                   how to use                   the weapon                   myself-----        she just fragmented            in tears before splintering                   tearing to shards herself          it took me til 15                that i was afraid                       to yet touch      even stare                even think         nothing.                   i never knew            what i was capable of                       i never knew how               to control        to even activate                  all i knew was that i was powerful i don't know what of but i have to save it            keep it         live it      nurture it        store it               amass it                  seep it              savor it                understand it     study it            feel it              polish it                         train it                                     let it breathe    let it sing                i could hear it sing     i could feel it whisper-----           and i was so afraid...                     all i saw of my mother was       that she was in pieces              long before i knew her.                  shambles                  and                  shackles          and i don't want to be that when i fire---- it wasn't supposed to strike me       but it did, and it struck me hard    reality            i was 16 when i        first made the discovery                  ----love-----           all at once                 and much, much too completely----       all off guard.          it was like                     you suddenly turned                 a blinding light       on something that had always been                  half a shadow         that's how it struck me...             that's how it shattered me...     it's like a full flashback            of my mother saying       'i told you so'                   except she never did.                and it struck me.       like i hit the right target at the wrong time       or the opposite of it           but truth is              i just hit       a poltergeist            way too soon                  and it wasn't like         it was the wind that was hit----     that's how it struck me,               love           and that's how it tore me apart.                  ----fragmented---- and it did not take me long to realise what glass cannons we were...           all my life       i never tried to          activate my strength and when i did               it imploded.                                it was a long time... and i was blinded----          it wasn't the hit              nor was it the miss that tore me apart                         it was love that broke me      because shattered pieces                     are not                 all that bad                             splinters...                    shards...                        fragments...                                     blades...              one shot was all it took         to break my heart                     and so suddenly...                     every part of me...                               was a weapon                          everyone who held me                                  hurt                                  bled                               cried                             pained                         burned                     wailed                enraged       agonized                    they turned to anger           then turned to hate                             they turned to each other                                  pretty soon turning to waste           it was then that it struck me                what a glass cannon is---- and it was until now that i was eluded...                         for that long a time        i thought shards were        all love could offer...        fragments were        all romance could be                      i met             your father             your father             your father             your father     and your father     all through different shards                       until i saw what i had                  all in shambles                  and                  all in shackles      just like my mother              that's when it struck me         ---ecstasy---                        cause looking into your eyes               my children                      i love you          as a whole                   not like with your fathers             or like with the guys before them         or like the guys before the other guys                          i wanted more than ever                     to love you                 more than                       a few shards                   all tainted               with blood           or with anger                   or with both----                   that's when it hit me            and it hit me with so much pain...            what my mother really should have said. being a glass cannon      doesn't mean being           a weapon to hurt others-----                     it means one day,               no one knows when,        but it will surely come           like a thief in the night...                  love   and you will give your all   even if it shatters you to pieces                and even if you are already in pieces        because you know love        can make you again whole.
0
May 6, 2018
May 6, 2018 at 11:30 AM UTC
fake_ian--G1100
Glass Cannon
i was young...       well, younger than now----    it was when it first struck me it struck me hard.           it struck me like reality...        but more like          reality when reality comes     in the face of your              family         all in chains...      then, reality looks like dreams altogether;             no not fantasy----               not exactly a nightmare either                          more like                   ----ecstasy-----       "you are a special weapon"            "something of great potential"         "and massive power"               "but you only have one shot"           mom always used to say.                    i even once thought                        she stashed some kind of            deathray or sting ray or something            in my arm----     ----it won't be the first thing                  she stuffed in me anyway...               i was eight years old when she                      finally continued the sentence.            before total silence.                   "make it count."        "cause whether you hit"          "or even if you miss..."            "you would be broken"             "shattered-----"             "torn to pieces-----"             "torn apart."                                  "so please"                                "don't"                         "break"                             "yourself"                                 "shooting"                                     "for"                       "nothing."                   she never taught me                   how to use                   the weapon                   myself-----        she just fragmented            in tears before splintering                   tearing to shards herself          it took me til 15                that i was afraid                       to yet touch      even stare                even think         nothing.                   i never knew            what i was capable of                       i never knew how               to control        to even activate                  all i knew was that i was powerful i don't know what of but i have to save it            keep it         live it      nurture it        store it               amass it                  seep it              savor it                understand it     study it            feel it              polish it                         train it                                     let it breathe    let it sing                i could hear it sing     i could feel it whisper-----           and i was so afraid...                     all i saw of my mother was       that she was in pieces              long before i knew her.                  shambles                  and                  shackles          and i don't want to be that when i fire---- it wasn't supposed to strike me       but it did, and it struck me hard    reality            i was 16 when i        first made the discovery                  ----love-----           all at once                 and much, much too completely----       all off guard.          it was like                     you suddenly turned                 a blinding light       on something that had always been                  half a shadow         that's how it struck me...             that's how it shattered me...     it's like a full flashback            of my mother saying       'i told you so'                   except she never did.                and it struck me.       like i hit the right target at the wrong time       or the opposite of it           but truth is              i just hit       a poltergeist            way too soon                  and it wasn't like         it was the wind that was hit----     that's how it struck me,               love           and that's how it tore me apart.                  ----fragmented---- and it did not take me long to realise what glass cannons we were...           all my life       i never tried to          activate my strength and when i did               it imploded.                                it was a long time... and i was blinded----          it wasn't the hit              nor was it the miss that tore me apart                         it was love that broke me      because shattered pieces                     are not                 all that bad                             splinters...                    shards...                        fragments...                                     blades...              one shot was all it took         to break my heart                     and so suddenly...                     every part of me...                               was a weapon                          everyone who held me                                  hurt                                  bled                               cried                             pained                         burned                     wailed                enraged       agonized                    they turned to anger           then turned to hate                             they turned to each other                                  pretty soon turning to waste           it was then that it struck me                what a glass cannon is---- and it was until now that i was eluded...                         for that long a time        i thought shards were        all love could offer...        fragments were        all romance could be                      i met             your father             your father             your father             your father     and your father     all through different shards                       until i saw what i had                  all in shambles                  and                  all in shackles      just like my mother              that's when it struck me         ---ecstasy---                        cause looking into your eyes               my children                      i love you          as a whole                   not like with your fathers             or like with the guys before them         or like the guys before the other guys                          i wanted more than ever                     to love you                 more than                       a few shards                   all tainted               with blood           or with anger                   or with both----                   that's when it hit me            and it hit me with so much pain...            what my mother really should have said. being a glass cannon      doesn't mean being           a weapon to hurt others-----                     it means one day,               no one knows when,        but it will surely come           like a thief in the night...                  love   and you will give your all   even if it shatters you to pieces                and even if you are already in pieces        because you know love        can make you again whole.
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