#contentedness
as the mists of night rise,
I can see the faint illusory white light
in the distance, gleaming beautifully
like an oasis in the middle of the desert
I get up from my bed and open the window
tears welling up in my eyes, dissipating sorrow
suddenly, I saw life as it is and it was wonderful
I haven't had as terrible a life as I had thought
Isn't it funny how life is but a fleeting moment?
I can't say that it isn't filled with harsh torment
But happiness isn't too few to mention too
Life isn't always all shades of the color blue
I rest my head on my pillow again
Still, in my chest, I feel the subtle pain
But tomorrow is a new day
and, perhaps, the beginning of the end
of all this terrible pain I've endured.
Jul 25, 2022
Jul 25, 2022 at 10:04 PM UTC
Sometimes the happy sounds of my life
Start to blend together.
The quiet growl of my dog
When she’s signaling to me
she is all at once
Comfy
Yet fierce.
The deep rumble of my husband’s snore.
Signaling to me
He is all at once
Safe
Happy and
Loved.
The hum of the microwave
Saving us once again from the pains of cooking
After a long day apart.
Its chime signally to me
All at once
I am comfy
Yet fierce.
I am safe.
Happy
And loved.
All I have to do is listen
All at once.
Jan 23, 2019
Jan 23, 2019 at 4:51 PM UTC
Trees are trees
Birds are birds
Bees are bees
Cats are cats
Dogs are Dogs
Flies are flies
Bugs are bugs
Leaves are leaves
Wings are wings
I am me
that isn't changing.
Mar 13, 2018
Mar 13, 2018 at 7:44 PM UTC
finally
a moment
comes
delicately
to sit
relaxed
in quiet
peace.
I close my eyes
to hear
what is in the silence.
beautiful summer rain
soaking
the trees
an the old metal roof
sings along
with unusual songbirds
this year
creaky aluminum
bends in temperature changes
a door sways
back an forth
gentle rhythms
all together
a benevolent band
wet parachuting droplets
bursting on impact,
a soft howling wind
accompanying
their tune.
my ears hummmm..
with vibrations,
apparently
I only hear
when I listen
so intently to life.
which is something
I need to do more often
to be honest
amongst the utter
chaos an confusion
I am currently in.
contentedness for me
is a destination I seek.
it is then-
it is then when I find my ZEN,
where I can honestly be
I honestly am
appreciative
for even
the pain
that I have felt.
that I've endured.
that I have persevered over.
why?
you might wonder?
I think it is simple-
cumulus clouds provide rain,
rain provides water,
water is life.
I am water,
an therefore
I wish to be.
May 29, 2017
May 29, 2017 at 8:17 AM UTC
Spirit, yearning so
waves, the cherry blossom hangs
so high; so my love.
Feb 15, 2017
Feb 15, 2017 at 3:52 PM UTC
An addiction to the color named red,
An affinity to feelings of dread,
Like waterfalls and raindrops, I feel drenched,
Clothed in a gown of crimson red is death.
Hemophilia causes excessive blood loss,
Just by being touched, you bloom like a rose!
Like roses with thorns that bleeds it's color.
To me who's bleeding out, "You're just a pose!"
I scream out with anguish, a quiet pause.
I lay in a pool of ****** dolor...
To me, you're lips are just like spikes and thorns,
With flowery words born from blooming roses,
As if an explosion of gray matter,
Were your poems that made me bleed all-out.
Jan 13, 2017
Jan 13, 2017 at 6:10 AM UTC
To grasp the space between your fingers
would be much too big a handful
for someone who has only ever held before
explosions from hands
which closed too soon
To understand the breaths between your words
would be a story far too deep for a person who
has only ever heard before the echoes of
shallow water wells
whose drains let out too soon
Though having but a drip of your presence
in my world pool has created a current
where I could happily drown in all of the
future waters but I can't bare
to keep living like that
Jul 22, 2015
Jul 22, 2015 at 4:09 PM UTC
On the night that I dreamed you had died,
I didn't want them to see me crying in the kitchen,
But I did, and spoke only the truth for the day,
In honor of you. I hope that it wasn't a dumb thing to do.
It probably was.
I didn't want to speak to people you knew,
But I did. Told them how I knew you and, now,
With you gone...
**** it, you wouldn't want this,
All this spewing of emotion, this lament of the flesh,
From which you're now gone.
I said I felt bad for loving you so much, but then I remembered your words,
I said I was wrong, I said I was weak, but then I remembered your words,
When you said,
"You are, but that's o.k."
It's the consolation of a friend, now gone, distilled to the essence,
Of what you needed to hear,
Exactly when you needed to hear it.
Jun 19, 2015
Jun 19, 2015 at 2:57 PM UTC
Its been two months
and I can't remember your face
Even in my dreams,
you come to me only as a feeling,
intangible, just out of reach
But I'm not reaching
I'm content to let it slip by
pass away, slowly,
the light has already faded
for the day;
for my lifetime
Dawns taste differently now,
brighter, and sweeter,
with hints of roses, or magnolias,
of lemongrass, and thai basil;
of hope
of all the things I loved and longed for,
yet couldn’t make out
in the dimness of the early day
( in the darkness of your shadow)
Morning sunlight peeks through
my wavering eyelids
and I accept its request,
satisfied
As easily as the seasons change,
your memory lost its colors
gradually, unnoticed by my own eye;
with open arms
I've embraced the new stillness
your absence affords
Feb 5, 2015
Feb 5, 2015 at 2:30 PM UTC
Like two hearts,
beating hands against
a flame
in the cold.
Singed with warmth,
screaming in joy,
warm outside.
Blue blood.
Exhaling vulgarities
through locked jaws
and a grin.
Apr 8, 2014
Apr 8, 2014 at 6:26 PM UTC