#calmly
I should allow myself doing nothing.
It's odd, it's not a bit me at all.
Working and working, on and on always.
There's short of days and nights noway in whole.
I should allow myself off-the-cuff,
Thinking or straining nowise entirely.
Just sit around and doing nothing,
And savour my unsweet coffee calmly.
I should allow myself simply never
Leave my desires and dreams until later.
I'm not forever with this time exactly.
I'm a grain of creation in fact, no greater.
I should allow myself to live truly,
To live this life as it's given to me since day one.
And now simply live, there is no hurry.
I've already much more and awry done.
May 11, 2025
May 11, 2025 at 5:38 PM UTC
Intrusive image invading unstable imagination
Bursting bright bringing bouncing bobbling bits of bubbling illusions into brain
A memory of magical messy minutes moseying and mingling
A menagerie of magnificent moments miraculously marked in my mischievous mind
Coming into chaotic corners of cornea calmly
Cruising without cares
Dec 10, 2020
Dec 10, 2020 at 11:25 AM UTC
She was hurt and confused. She didn’t know what she wanted and hated putting him through her cycle of immaturity. She hated writers that describe her by “She” instead of writing her name.
He doesn’t know what I want. **** I don’t even know if I know what I want. I think I want him but how can I be sure. He doesn’t like it when I don’t talk and ignore him but this texting thread is the only safety I have from him. If he is frustrated with me, he won’t be able to care. Wow. This should just be a business opportunity: “Don’t buy trojans, try ******* that special someone off.”
“So, are we going to talk or?”
Here he goes again, it’s my fault. I shuffle my feet and remind him that I don’t have a topic to talk about.
“I think I am going to be single soon.”
“Why?”
“Well, when you answer my question, I can answer.”
Another ploy to try and get me to open up, I won’t fall for it.
“That is unfair.”
It really isn’t though. I think I totally should be talking, I just don’t want to be his. Not like this, not right now. This isn’t reasonable.
Love isn’t reasonable. Stay out of my mind you filthy serpent. You know nothing of who I am or what I have to go through to sit across from him. This flask is near empty and I can barely entertain a conversation. Holding his hand feels like a roller coaster that you know could ride right off the tracks. Beautiful. Terrifying.
“Here we are again, in silence.”
“Sorry...”
I don’t know why I apologize to him every time he says I don’t entertain him enough. I’m not his puppet, I would like his hands to be all over and inside me. Wow, nice thought there, really helpful for this whole avoidance thing.
“Do you want to fight?”
“No, but it feels like we are going to. We always do.”
Why did I say that? I need to stop. I need to keep going, I’m not even light headed anymore.
shuffling, rejection, awkward apology
“Sorry, I just can’t, I can’t do that.”
“It’s fine.”
“Are you just going to keep being mad and not talking?”
Fight with me, fight with me, please.
“I said I’m fine”
“But you are not fine. If you are going to be like this... let me out of the car”
“I’m not like that, even if you hate me, I can take you home.”
I ******* hate that about him but I love it.
“Let me out.”
(Please don’t)
Jun 15, 2017
Jun 15, 2017 at 5:32 AM UTC
Don't underestimate, dilate or infatuate yourself with any one thing, person or activity
To the square root of time divided by the tranquility
Within the boundaries of forever and infinity
You can decipher it with love
Still debating whether or not life can be held with just one glove
Still we wait
I almost decided to close the gate
Lock the doors
Swear at the top of my lungs
That this song has already been sung
But I didn't
I can't win when my neck is still so hung
Up
On the fact that the human condition is still a sad rendition on what real happiness is trying to finish
Not until the end
She said
Not without a friend to hold hands with
Lie on the floor and in dreams you would dance with
I can't help it if we chose it
I can't help it if we're suppose to do it
It's not like I'm the one who gave you the power to abuse it
Please
Calmly step forward
Your passion will guide you to the new world order
Sep 7, 2014
Sep 7, 2014 at 11:20 AM UTC