#braveface - Hello Poetry

I pop open the blister pack and poke the pill through, dip it in sugar to mimic an advent calendar. The doors are endless, a childhood dream. I can’t get used to the lightness of despair. I’ve mastered depression- damp, bell-heavy, but despair? It’s almost ethereal. Fairy lights in the breeze, a brief twinkle the wink of a tealight before it concludes. The children hand me treasures they’ve found in the mud Forest School, or playing outside as it used to be called, before everything needed branding. I smile, another leaf for my hair more stones for my pocket. Anchors in open water. ‘Are you okay, Miss?’ I sink into mauve bubbles, not trying to drown only grounding my weight again. Lilac shimmers the water and I trickle it over me, smearing life across sallow skin. My Rudolph earrings hang florid tinsel etches my scalp. It’s the Nativity today and my beaming face will echo that of the angels. Happy.

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Dec 16, 2020

Dec 16, 2020 at 8:11 AM UTC

JadeLW

Trying to be festive

I pop open the blister pack and poke the pill through, dip it in sugar to mimic an advent calendar. The doors are endless, a childhood dream. I can’t get used to the lightness of despair. I’ve mastered depression- damp, bell-heavy, but despair? It’s almost ethereal. Fairy lights in the breeze, a brief twinkle the wink of a tealight before it concludes. The children hand me treasures they’ve found in the mud Forest School, or playing outside as it used to be called, before everything needed branding. I smile, another leaf for my hair more stones for my pocket. Anchors in open water. ‘Are you okay, Miss?’ I sink into mauve bubbles, not trying to drown only grounding my weight again. Lilac shimmers the water and I trickle it over me, smearing life across sallow skin. My Rudolph earrings hang florid tinsel etches my scalp. It’s the Nativity today and my beaming face will echo that of the angels. Happy.

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Wounded wings of a bird of prey Perched atop its nesting place Flightless fear of the mighty proud Does not betray its fearsome face. Savage shrieks sustain from gritty beak Lest the lowly prey start to suspect The terror hidden by beady stare Knows the wingless cannot life protect. High up on tree top, talons grip tight But to beseech is not to be a beast The power owned by the bird of prey Is to hover aloft its menial feast. But treebound talons cannot the brute sustain So tucking pride away it pleads for aid The asymptotes connect but all too late Unheard echoes of its last calls fade. Glassy eyed, this mighty bird it falls From once its coveted place of rest That helpless wingless bird of prey Lies now amidst common prey and pest.

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Feb 15, 2016

Feb 15, 2016 at 1:33 AM UTC

ssu7

Wounded bird

Wounded wings of a bird of prey Perched atop its nesting place Flightless fear of the mighty proud Does not betray its fearsome face. Savage shrieks sustain from gritty beak Lest the lowly prey start to suspect The terror hidden by beady stare Knows the wingless cannot life protect. High up on tree top, talons grip tight But to beseech is not to be a beast The power owned by the bird of prey Is to hover aloft its menial feast. But treebound talons cannot the brute sustain So tucking pride away it pleads for aid The asymptotes connect but all too late Unheard echoes of its last calls fade. Glassy eyed, this mighty bird it falls From once its coveted place of rest That helpless wingless bird of prey Lies now amidst common prey and pest.

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If you shot me with a gun I'd probably apologise to you I say sorry for everything Cause that is what I've learnt to do They tell me not to say I'm sorry Cause it's not like it's my fault But I just want to make them happy And it kills me when they're not. If someone you loved had passed away I'd probably blame it on myself Cause everything is my fault I'll keep my problems on my shelf They tell me not to apologise for my existence But what a sorry existence I am I crave someone to make me happy But no one out there gives a **** They say I need to learn to say no But the words won't leave my mouth And even when I am not happy I'll try not to make a sound And I can learn to find my voice Or I can stay in the same place I know I'll never be happy If I keep putting on a brave face So tonight I'll rest my bones And when the sun comes up at dawn I wont apologise for you No I won't say sorry to you any more.

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Aug 29, 2014

Aug 29, 2014 at 1:39 PM UTC

candynoire

My apologies

If you shot me with a gun I'd probably apologise to you I say sorry for everything Cause that is what I've learnt to do They tell me not to say I'm sorry Cause it's not like it's my fault But I just want to make them happy And it kills me when they're not. If someone you loved had passed away I'd probably blame it on myself Cause everything is my fault I'll keep my problems on my shelf They tell me not to apologise for my existence But what a sorry existence I am I crave someone to make me happy But no one out there gives a **** They say I need to learn to say no But the words won't leave my mouth And even when I am not happy I'll try not to make a sound And I can learn to find my voice Or I can stay in the same place I know I'll never be happy If I keep putting on a brave face So tonight I'll rest my bones And when the sun comes up at dawn I wont apologise for you No I won't say sorry to you any more.

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