#bodyshape
I sit on our recliner,
Luna bar wrapper on the floor.
My robe is cinched
too tight, a reminder--
your fingers should meet
around my waist, but my ****
and *** should spill out of your palms
because defined curves and wiles
are the definition of a divine
woman worthy of insta-fame,
tumblr posts, and right
swipes.
I'll twist and turn and pose
in front of any mirror, desperate
for a flat-planed stomach and fuller
cleavage, the whole time
wondering if you look at me bent
over the bathroom counter, fixing my eyeliner,
and think that I'm a dime disguised
in a size 0 dress.
If my sides could shrink as fast
as my self-esteem, I'd never crunch
my abs into idealistic numbers again.
Jan 17, 2016
Jan 17, 2016 at 10:11 PM UTC
How do you love yourself
When all you want is someone eles.
It kills me to see everyday
What I've always wanted
But could never pay to have.
I was born the way I am
Whether I like it or not
And it makes me cry at night to visualize what I want
But now know is impossible to have.
It hit me like a train
Breathless
Frozen in time
The seconds seemed like minutes flowing by
Tears streamed down my face and I couldn't make words
I couldn't speak
Being told I'll never have what I've always looked forward to
Always wanted to have
Sincerely shattered me.
I was told I needed to look at myself in the mirror
And tell myself I love myself
And will make what I have work
That would be a lying,
But I guess I'll have to learn,
Because if I dont soon
Im not sure how much longer I'll last.
Jan 12, 2015
Jan 12, 2015 at 8:58 PM UTC
She put on her good bra
and braced herself
for a heavy day ahead
Aug 21, 2018
Aug 21, 2018 at 3:12 AM UTC
with the sun do I rise
early enough that its still dark outside
late enough that I have to rush my painting
I stand there in front of my mirror shirtless
how did I let myself go this far?
all I see is rolls of fat and large thighs
they tell me im beautiful, but people are filled with lies
oversized clothing used to hide my disgraceful frame
layers upon layers of paint cover my canvas
each stroke hiding every imperfection
goodbye blotches of red
goodbye freckles and moles
goodbye ugly smile lines
I leave the house looking so "normal"
makeup blended to look "natural"
every night I go to bed,
I prepare the the ritual that is about to entail
May 28
May 28, 2026 at 7:02 AM UTC