#beingmyself - Hello Poetry

I awaken in darkness still terrified and running from the mountain lion. But what if I’m the prey of my own judging captive of my comparisons? At times I feel those verdicts in my gut like when I can’t concentrate on a task I SHOULD be doing. When I notice my tight gut and my mind wanting to flee I can stop trying and lying to myself set my imagination free roam a wilderness I choose like right here on the flat and fertile plains of this poem’s lines.

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Sep 21, 2021

Sep 21, 2021 at 2:15 PM UTC

glenn-currier

Wilderness Dreams

I awaken in darkness still terrified and running from the mountain lion. But what if I’m the prey of my own judging captive of my comparisons? At times I feel those verdicts in my gut like when I can’t concentrate on a task I SHOULD be doing. When I notice my tight gut and my mind wanting to flee I can stop trying and lying to myself set my imagination free roam a wilderness I choose like right here on the flat and fertile plains of this poem’s lines.

17

I am inspired to do better, desperation sets in when I am stalled I am inspired to be the flame, desperate when all it does is rain I am frustrated when you don’t want me to think, desperate for the freedom to string sentences that speak volumes I am frustrated when you box me up and put a label my existence, for I am desperately still seeking the real Me I am frustrated when my *** determines my potential, so desperate to break the chains that define a good girl I am frustrated when you see just my body, for I am desperate to show you that I am more than just these flesh and bones I am frustrated when you sympathise with me , desperate for you to empathise with me instead I am frustrated when you think when I express myself, I am hormonal, desperate for you to know that my ****** and brain are two separate entities Instead Inspire me, make me desperate to want to create a brand New version of me, a version that is comfortable in her skin, not frustrated because of the layers of ambiguity I have had to put on I am not a role, We are not role-playing, I am not just an employee, your mother, sister, wife, daughter, etc Don’t get frustrated when I challenge the status-quo, because thats when desperation sets in For we now realize that the sky is the limit for all of us , and now we are desperate for the wings to fly So dear friend, boss, brother, father, and husband, help me desperately fight against my daily frustrations, hear me out, guide me, but don’t think for a moment that just because I am frustrated I am desperate too. For I know now, that I live to be one with who I am, and nothing will change that for me, now or ever, and we are all going to live happily ever after!! For it’s really the oxygen from the frustration that has flamed my desperation to be all that I could and should have been. Bold, brave, kind, courageous and unapologetic-ally ME!

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Jul 2, 2020

Jul 2, 2020 at 12:13 PM UTC

nidhi-sharan

Desperately Frustrated

I am inspired to do better, desperation sets in when I am stalled I am inspired to be the flame, desperate when all it does is rain I am frustrated when you don’t want me to think, desperate for the freedom to string sentences that speak volumes I am frustrated when you box me up and put a label my existence, for I am desperately still seeking the real Me I am frustrated when my *** determines my potential, so desperate to break the chains that define a good girl I am frustrated when you see just my body, for I am desperate to show you that I am more than just these flesh and bones I am frustrated when you sympathise with me , desperate for you to empathise with me instead I am frustrated when you think when I express myself, I am hormonal, desperate for you to know that my ****** and brain are two separate entities Instead Inspire me, make me desperate to want to create a brand New version of me, a version that is comfortable in her skin, not frustrated because of the layers of ambiguity I have had to put on I am not a role, We are not role-playing, I am not just an employee, your mother, sister, wife, daughter, etc Don’t get frustrated when I challenge the status-quo, because thats when desperation sets in For we now realize that the sky is the limit for all of us , and now we are desperate for the wings to fly So dear friend, boss, brother, father, and husband, help me desperately fight against my daily frustrations, hear me out, guide me, but don’t think for a moment that just because I am frustrated I am desperate too. For I know now, that I live to be one with who I am, and nothing will change that for me, now or ever, and we are all going to live happily ever after!! For it’s really the oxygen from the frustration that has flamed my desperation to be all that I could and should have been. Bold, brave, kind, courageous and unapologetic-ally ME!

17

You’ll see me here again. In the world full of mist, With full spirit, and to desist, from being a dramatist. You’ll see me here again.

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Apr 28, 2018

Apr 28, 2018 at 11:33 AM UTC

deepak_wanderlust

Lost in Mist

You’ll see me here again. In the world full of mist, With full spirit, and to desist, from being a dramatist. You’ll see me here again.

6

And who am I to think I should be loved [When I’m not even sure what it means Being me Anymore] So I’m tucking away the parts of me [The Kate Lyn you know and love] That shouldn't exist That love you [You won’t have that frustrating child at your feet Tugging on your shirt for reassurance Anymore] I’m closing off the eyes I only had for you [Forever] And [In the meantime] I’ll learn Braille [So when you’re ready] I will trace your spine with my fingertips To see the name you’ve made for yourself [Maybe you’ll even let me read your lips With my own But I get too far ahead of myself By wishing that Don’t I, Love?] And who am I to think I should be loved [For all that I am] When I don’t even know what makes up all that I am [I have yet to discover my favorite flavor of ice cream And every stable person ought to know something like that, I think, Just in case.] Who am I to think that you would love me [I suppose that you did press your lips to my pages Leaving kisses in the footnotes of my story Burning away the definition of ‘just friends’] There are four holes in my story now [I counted] When I tell people what happened to us But love is more than that [I think That’s what I would like to learn At least By tucking myself away into an envelope for a while Or perhaps into a bottle I'd look prettier then Knees against my chest Watching my breath fog the glass Taking my finger to draw hearts in the condensation Letting it dry Just to trace it again Until you choose to see it Getting drunk off my own message] There’s more to me than the parts that love you [I hope] So I’m tucking myself away Like I’ve said [But hopefully not all of me Because that would mean I can’t find any part of me That cannot live without you] Until I know the meaning of me Until I can say I’ve left my hand on a stove for too long [Experimenting with other love Getting truly burned by a person that isn’t you] I will not let my pencil be my driftwood anymore [In this tempest we ignore] I will wash myself up onto white beaches Exploring the farthest reaches of my mind [To fill those empty places I never take time to think about With useful things Like white roses and garden gnomes Every yard ought to have those, I think, Just in case] I’m going to stretch myself [Until I’m thin enough to spread across a page To be read like a book Full of poetry that isn’t about you] I hope you know how much it will hurt to do something like that To let myself be put on display [In some foreign library in a distant country] To be looked through and seen By eyes that aren’t yours Because you’ll be somewhere else [Doing useful things Like matching socks Or playing cards Something like that] I’m going to live without you [For a while, My love] All those places that I’ve been wanting to see I’ll see alone First [I feel that every person ought to be alone At least for a little while At some point Before they can truly be happy with another] And if you ever care to find me [You know where] Open me up on your card-playing table [And if I've got white roses resting in my hair And burns on the palms of my hands] It will mean [That I’ve seen all I need And learned Braille enough] It will mean That I have learned what it [Truly] Means To live [Without you]

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Jan 8, 2013

Jan 8, 2013 at 12:11 AM UTC

kate-lyn

Code: To Love You

And who am I to think I should be loved [When I’m not even sure what it means Being me Anymore] So I’m tucking away the parts of me [The Kate Lyn you know and love] That shouldn't exist That love you [You won’t have that frustrating child at your feet Tugging on your shirt for reassurance Anymore] I’m closing off the eyes I only had for you [Forever] And [In the meantime] I’ll learn Braille [So when you’re ready] I will trace your spine with my fingertips To see the name you’ve made for yourself [Maybe you’ll even let me read your lips With my own But I get too far ahead of myself By wishing that Don’t I, Love?] And who am I to think I should be loved [For all that I am] When I don’t even know what makes up all that I am [I have yet to discover my favorite flavor of ice cream And every stable person ought to know something like that, I think, Just in case.] Who am I to think that you would love me [I suppose that you did press your lips to my pages Leaving kisses in the footnotes of my story Burning away the definition of ‘just friends’] There are four holes in my story now [I counted] When I tell people what happened to us But love is more than that [I think That’s what I would like to learn At least By tucking myself away into an envelope for a while Or perhaps into a bottle I'd look prettier then Knees against my chest Watching my breath fog the glass Taking my finger to draw hearts in the condensation Letting it dry Just to trace it again Until you choose to see it Getting drunk off my own message] There’s more to me than the parts that love you [I hope] So I’m tucking myself away Like I’ve said [But hopefully not all of me Because that would mean I can’t find any part of me That cannot live without you] Until I know the meaning of me Until I can say I’ve left my hand on a stove for too long [Experimenting with other love Getting truly burned by a person that isn’t you] I will not let my pencil be my driftwood anymore [In this tempest we ignore] I will wash myself up onto white beaches Exploring the farthest reaches of my mind [To fill those empty places I never take time to think about With useful things Like white roses and garden gnomes Every yard ought to have those, I think, Just in case] I’m going to stretch myself [Until I’m thin enough to spread across a page To be read like a book Full of poetry that isn’t about you] I hope you know how much it will hurt to do something like that To let myself be put on display [In some foreign library in a distant country] To be looked through and seen By eyes that aren’t yours Because you’ll be somewhere else [Doing useful things Like matching socks Or playing cards Something like that] I’m going to live without you [For a while, My love] All those places that I’ve been wanting to see I’ll see alone First [I feel that every person ought to be alone At least for a little while At some point Before they can truly be happy with another] And if you ever care to find me [You know where] Open me up on your card-playing table [And if I've got white roses resting in my hair And burns on the palms of my hands] It will mean [That I’ve seen all I need And learned Braille enough] It will mean That I have learned what it [Truly] Means To live [Without you]

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