#barmovementmovingmodern
Hey there, long time no—
“I need six espresso martinis.”
…Why did you have to come to this bar?
“Sorry, what was that?”
Oh, nothing. I’ll have you on your way,
“Can I also get—” Now look away,
Scoop in the fresh ice,
Now go in 4/4 ding—ping—ding—ping,
Listen to how the ice and tin sing.
A different guest yells,
“Hey! I’ve been waiting for a minute.”
It’s been less—put a pin in it.
Grab the bottle—pour,
Shake it, strain it, let it entice,
Grab the knife, and don’t forget the half-slice.
Uh… This card won’t work,
Now he’s fumbling—his face is red,
Oh no, "I got Apple Pay instead."
Let’s move on to her,
Hey there— “What wine do you recommend?”
Therapy, silence, or the special blend.
Uh, the best one is—
“Never mind, I just want a white claw,
and I’m a lady. Can I get a straw?”
This job is toxic like my—
Hey! Get your ********* friend—
Off the table! Close out. The end.
Apr 14
Apr 14, 2026 at 5:19 PM UTC