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#anxietyinsilence
I am constantly trying to communicate something incommunicable, to explain something inexplicable, to tell about something I only feel in my bones and which can only be experienced in those bones. Basically it is nothing other than this fear we have so often talked about, but fear spread to everything, fear of the greatest as of the smallest, fear, paralyzing fear of pronouncing a word, although this fear may not only be fear but also a longing for something greater than all that is fearful
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Aug 4, 2025
Aug 4, 2025 at 2:04 PM UTC
Kuch_baatein_khud_se
What Cannot Be Said, Only Felt
I am constantly trying to communicate something incommunicable, to explain something inexplicable, to tell about something I only feel in my bones and which can only be experienced in those bones. Basically it is nothing other than this fear we have so often talked about, but fear spread to everything, fear of the greatest as of the smallest, fear, paralyzing fear of pronouncing a word, although this fear may not only be fear but also a longing for something greater than all that is fearful
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__Crowd noise__ — silent tones said under my breath, as my faith’s HP is beeping so loud, that I’ve learned to ignore it. I’m semi- crawled, half-walking toward a maze of unknowns, given just enough truth to fold and tuck inside the mind. _But I guess it’s the advice to mind your step_… especially when overstepping your reach, as the hand that lives in poverty often feels cut short — and life itself is even shorter. You exercise your right to live, but the final test is only passed at your passing. And right now, I’m growing into my own powers, but even I can get overpowered by my pride — refracted slightly; border-jumping into lives I was never really invited into. __An alien, indeed.__ See me hovering like a UFO above heads that don’t know me, but still see me appear in their atmosphere. And I don’t fully enjoy this _alienation_… and sometimes I wish I could just land and be human — and to actually feel grounded on this Earth, so that the atmosphere of my prayers don’t feel so tight. As the atmosphere of a prayer feels tighter when the pain of your struggles, wraps its hands around your ribs — a tightened breath, and even tighter belief. When it gets so hard to say thanks when you’re hurting, harder to say __Amen__ when you're unsure if the line still connects. As the mind feels so crowded — a room full of voices, echoing opinions, guilt, hope, and noise. And sometimes I wonder if the silence in between prayers, becomes the answer to help me feel better with it all.
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Jul 14, 2025
Jul 14, 2025 at 12:09 PM UTC
OddOdysseyPoet
Crowded Frequencies
__Crowd noise__ — silent tones said under my breath, as my faith’s HP is beeping so loud, that I’ve learned to ignore it. I’m semi- crawled, half-walking toward a maze of unknowns, given just enough truth to fold and tuck inside the mind. _But I guess it’s the advice to mind your step_… especially when overstepping your reach, as the hand that lives in poverty often feels cut short — and life itself is even shorter. You exercise your right to live, but the final test is only passed at your passing. And right now, I’m growing into my own powers, but even I can get overpowered by my pride — refracted slightly; border-jumping into lives I was never really invited into. __An alien, indeed.__ See me hovering like a UFO above heads that don’t know me, but still see me appear in their atmosphere. And I don’t fully enjoy this _alienation_… and sometimes I wish I could just land and be human — and to actually feel grounded on this Earth, so that the atmosphere of my prayers don’t feel so tight. As the atmosphere of a prayer feels tighter when the pain of your struggles, wraps its hands around your ribs — a tightened breath, and even tighter belief. When it gets so hard to say thanks when you’re hurting, harder to say __Amen__ when you're unsure if the line still connects. As the mind feels so crowded — a room full of voices, echoing opinions, guilt, hope, and noise. And sometimes I wonder if the silence in between prayers, becomes the answer to help me feel better with it all.
Continue reading...
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