#alterego
I woke up with a noose around our neck.
I thought it wasn't real,maybe,
a scene from a dream?
The snapping of the tree branch.
You use your nocturnal carte blanche
for just this one thing, it seems?
Every night you're given another chance.
Perchance;
Shrubbery snubbed your success, this time.
Instead of being caught by the bushes,
We could've collided into those boulders below!
Luck decided to show.
Intervened when there was no one else to.
I stranded us both on this island:
it's just me and you.
What delusions helped shape your one truth?
This island is a (psychological) poker table for two.
I deal from the deck.
We play a game reminiscent
of four-hand Omaha.
Sitting across from each other:
It always ends in a draw.
You know I can read your poker face.
You know I detest the one desire you chase.
Make your excuses:
They won't help you leave this place.
I see the ace up your sleeve:
It has always been homicide.
I wish you saw this body same as I-sacred.
Its purpose is to serve us,not be desecrated.
Everyday I pray in its name.
you prey.
plotting its demise at night.
One temple.
Two temperaments.
Your one-way fight.
at the Altar I pay tithes.
We are two alters-tied.
You wish to ***** out my life,
Yet abhor the idea of suicide.
I will never leave your bloodlust unchecked.
Your worst intentions(what do they reflect?)
You once could reside in the heart of the city,
Near the coast, by a bustling transit station.
I emerged that day to save them all from you-
You planned to derail a monorail
with a distraction,
Disguised as an altercation.
denied you your reverie
Of a premeditated killing spree,
stranded us intentionally far out at sea.
your constellation prize now
is trying to **** me.
You plant your ***** traps in the dark
while I'm sound asleep.
One morning
I
awoke
and water welcomed our lungs.
Weights wound round our feet,
took us down deep where fishes sleep.
One morning
I
awoke
and smelled smoke clawing at our throat.
Only one entrance in and out of our cave.
and of course: you'd set the entrance ablaze
One morning
I
awoke
and was in a daze
You had consumed something similar to peyote.
Slathered our skin in spices with a savory glaze,
then left us to be eaten in a den full of coyotes.
One morning
I
awoke And
One morning I
awoke
And
This morning I
Awoke
and this time. instead of death traps ...
my notebook was nestled in my lap.
ripped out pages I had written
-directed at you-
you glued them to trees with their own sap.
Splayed them out like Hansel and gretel,
for me to follow like a trail or a map.
But I'm no fool.
Luring me on a paper trail to buy my trust.
Where are the trojans that you've hidden?
Trying this new scheme
to occupy my attention.
I know you wish to slice and dice.
If I lose and you win:
we both will pay the price.
Yet, still I follow your route.
I have hope for what you want me to see.
I will always love you
because you're a part of me.
Maybe we can play a new game?
Learn from one another?
I know you think I'm your enemy,
but I've always seen you as my brother.
Shudder-I smell death.
I approach a clearing in the woods.
why have you brought me here?
Atop an amalgamation of numerous dead fowl, fish, rabbits, (those same) coyote
and deer.
A single piece of paper;
clear off the guts and grime.
Tears in my eyes, holding the paper dear.
That single sentence you wrote down:
I never thought I'd live to see this day.
That one line,
that one line was all I ever hoped to hear you say:
"Together at our Altar we will pray."
-
Feb 3, 2023
Feb 3, 2023 at 2:37 AM UTC
I am fighting feelings
that been confined.
There's no escape
from the prison
within my mind.
My thoughts
shaking and breaking
every single line,
_I have to walk on..._
Breaking the chains
Connected to the hands of time
Lost in story lines
Conversations in darkness
Talking to myself
speaking with shadows
I am losing my all
inside the confines of
my magically mystical messy mind
Who Will You Call Now?
Should I go after every bad soul alive?
Don't try it. It's not wise kid.
All for you. I'll make a way for me.
I'll give anything to save these lives.
To bring more endless possibilities.
Tapped into variations of magic
Normal eyes cannot see
Lyrical conjurer. Adjective assassin.
I'm simply following the creed
Compared to your favorites
I'm basically, taking the lead
Made promises in blood
I will maintain before
it all goes in vain. From now, til the day I leave!
"We are suppose to save the world!"
Never follow the sheep.
Don't buy into promises
you cannot afford to keep!
Live your dreams!
In the wake of any ray
from the light of life
I refuse to die in my sleep!
For it's known
It's not easy being me.
It's not what you see on tv
Trials and tribulations
Progress through poverty
I am living for peace.
No force alive can deprive me
of my desired liberty!
I am down on my last whim
I do this for them
I'm going for the GOAL
Please, get out of the way
If you barely reach the rim!
_I rewind and enlighten minds.
I call upon the power of the great divine
Provide deities and entities
as a guide with clearer signs.
Nonsense aside, I'm all for the grind
Don't judge me unless you
know what my scars define!
I'll defy every impossibility
in a matter of time._
IT'S ALL A SIGN!
IT'S ALL A SIGN!
_It's all a sign
Cannot allow the demons
conquer your mind
Whenever it's cloudy and dark outside
the sun will always be back to shine
You light is keeping every pat of me alive
I promise over all, you will shine
it's all just a matter of a time!_
_My light it burns
It does not shine unless
I am by my son.
I am the fire. Surrounded in smoke.
I am in a trans red eclipse.
Energy pounding in my heart and throat.
I feel the heat of the sun.
The light in me
has much more to become.
I am lost from all
but over all I still have hope!
I feel myself breaking.
Sorry, for every promise that I broke.
My heart goes to the beat
and it's pounding hard like a drum.
Careful how you tread in this lifetime
cause for right now, you only have one
Understand the walks of life
because you have to crawl before you run.
Your value is priceless, remember that
with anything else is said and done!_
Jul 19, 2022
Jul 19, 2022 at 9:26 PM UTC
Lately, it been hard for me to unwind
All my emotions are twisted in a bind
Losing my head to the war
that's going on in my mind
All I feel like I'm doing
is wasting away my time
On the grind, I gotta remain. Touch from Pain.
I need a sign. No dollar signs.
Yes, my boy is living it up!
Thanks! He's more than just fine!
If I take a ********* out, then why is that a crime?
Monsters sin more than Satan on a Sunday
Justice systems always misconstrue
What we say!
Everybody wants a change, I'm a bit insane.
These lower beings don't deserve lives.
The truth can'hurt us like a *****
Shoot. Ha. It will cut you down to size!
While you're trying to figure why?
I'll wait... now please, show me, where did I lie?
****
Which side you play yo part,
standard-ass boy, do you even ride?
They want us to discriminate and to divide
Eyes in the sky, watching us on the rise
You can't **** my high...
You will never, take away what is mine!
This is than just a vibe,
this is more than just my pride!
Live by my words, every part of me
speaks and lives in these lines!
Eye for eye, ain't enough.
When the difficulty is do or die.
I'm cool as fire, yo
just let the ******** slide
Cause at the end of the day,
it's all keeping me alive!
_[Chorus]
World on my shoulders
but I'll keep my head up
Promise everyone will
See See See See
World on my shoulders
but I'll keep my head up
Promise everyone will
See See See See....._
Feb 15, 2022
Feb 15, 2022 at 12:09 AM UTC
floating around
just realising i am the afterthought
not the initial
essential
first thing to hand
front of your mind
that is where ego resides
but why must i demand
to be there
the centre of it all?
i expect too highly
i expect that of myself
but to expect that of others
is cruel
Jul 25, 2020
Jul 25, 2020 at 10:56 AM UTC
broken is his design, a world of possibilities
‘now I’m fully mine,’ a mind’s
desirability
Jul 1, 2020
Jul 1, 2020 at 12:17 PM UTC
The spark
Went out.
His eyes,
Two hollow lakes
Of black ink.
In them swimming
His demons,
Declaring that
They have
Won
Jul 1, 2020
Jul 1, 2020 at 12:11 PM UTC
I rise dandy and gay, darling
Carelessly waving away the past
Shining against the cruel light
I am washed and anew
I am a surging black tide
Strutting between smoky darkness
Wearing a harlequin dress
Bathing in the light of the dew
I am femme, and I am fatale
Follow me down the winding corridor
Twisting, snarling, enticing, enthralling
Into the land where flames brew
Jun 18, 2019
Jun 18, 2019 at 3:21 AM UTC
So you're insecure...
You've come to the right place
I wear the mask of alter
and then dance the night through peoples eyes
May 18, 2019
May 18, 2019 at 5:14 AM UTC
Mirror
Mirror on the wall
Why can't I recognise
my reflec tion at all?
I recognise the face and skin
But not the personality
within within
Oh Mirror mirror
On the wall
Tell me
who
am
I
At
all?
Feb 17, 2019
Feb 17, 2019 at 10:11 AM UTC
Sam:
If I were say I'm out of time
You would believe me, right?
Nope
My life is dope
Its what I smoke
Constantine constantly so
Can't be, can't see, no?
Out of time, out of life
Bacardi so sublime
With a slice a'lime
Four lyrics a line
And substance abuse is fine
We going fishing some time?
No hook but I'm hanging from a line
Limited edition
Nope
I'm one of a kind
You wanted me to change my style
Change the one thing that makes me smile
Change takes time
So it'll take a while
LyleRose:
What are you talking about Sam
Always acting like you've had
Enough of going through life
Here's the answer you've tried to find
I'll give you a clue it starts with Ssssuicide
Sam:
Yeah but I mean it as a joke
LyleRose:
Haha that's so funny you made me choke
I mean you rap'bout smoke
How' bout you join me for a ****
Ciggerettes or Dope?
Sam:
But that's a slippery slope
I only do what I have to to cope
LyleRose:
All this lying to ya'self has to stop
You incredible degenerate
Waiting for a ***** pop
Is that what you see
Cop a feel
Paranoid about the police
I know just how you feel
Sam:
NO SHUT UP!
Get out of my head
I'm not some book you can just read
LyleRose:
How'bout you get up
Get outta bed
and do something instead
Sam:
I just hardly have anytime
I'm just trying to get by
Stop with the questions
Cos I don't even know why
LyleRose:
They say fake it
Until you make it
But you ain't made it
And you just as fake, ****
Sam:
What about the countless
Nights I work till late
LyleRose/Sam:
Maybe we should just run away
Other side of the world is far enough away
Family don't matter to you so just get away
Find some other place
With a trusting friend to stay
Its up to you
What are we going to do
This choice is for you
LyleRose:
SAM?!
Sam:
WHAT!!?
LyleRose:
No one's gonna love you
Like I do....
Feb 14, 2019
Feb 14, 2019 at 6:36 AM UTC
The feeling of your lips on mine
moving in synch to the music
slurred words
I cannot remember
laughter and tears
caused by forgotten actions
waking up
the next morning
feeling like
it wasn't me.
Jan 2, 2019
Jan 2, 2019 at 2:10 PM UTC
Day by day I fritter away
Observing decorum as best I may
Meet me as you meet — reserved somebody
Leave me as you leave — dull nobody
Dreary, weary, listless, spiritless
A resting spirit clamours to emerge
Unguided, wild, free and seeking
Boldly defying reserved somebody
But how, just how do I unleash this defiant spirit
For it is to cross all conceivable limits
Oh but a mask, of course a mask!
The perfect accessory for this task!
Careless of propriety
Boastful of daring
Acting against my will
Or in tandem with it?
This mask — just now I can't discern
Ponder I do with great concern
Does it shield my identity
Or render truth to it?
So now just what fun in masks
One may ponderously ask
Masks, bring to life fantasy
Fantasy, a realm of our reality
Reality, wherein lies multiplicity
Multiplicity, within each individuality
Oct 23, 2018
Oct 23, 2018 at 11:04 AM UTC
I'm a poet it's in my blood. But all I really want is to settle dow n w/ a smart good-looking girl & move to raise a few kids in a safe , nice place where I can live simply, write directly & think clearly.
Johnny Noir, on the other hand wants to take enough speed to stop his heart & get ******** drunk write international bestsellers; run around w/ expensive ****** while smoking primo hairy bud like a chimney. J
. N: smoking drinking ******* TC: don't bother me unless it's important
a poison apple shot w/ a Sweet Prince chaser
that's sounds sooo good!
May 26, 2018
May 26, 2018 at 9:08 AM UTC
Sometimes I wish I really was a bin.
Trash could fill my surrounds, and in.
******* would be in my mind,
I sometimes I could hope,
that a coin
might land
inside
.
May 24, 2018
May 24, 2018 at 10:36 PM UTC
what a pity
spent the last few years idling in a thin sense of self;
amid outstretched pores looking to photosynthesize more eccentric disposition
even though i know you know my woes consecrate through the spirit, through the veins
what i have shown you is thicker than blood–better count your blessings
so HA! neglect wont erase the ways ive molded your mind
its a gift, to
ditch reason for compassion
to breathe vanity
to breathe immortal sorrow…
my most absurd suggestion yet, now listen closely:
when the tips of my fingers freeze over, let sleeping mountains lie
do hate, but dont devour it;
holy holy holy holy hold the past like a knife
apologies for my insincerity but you must understand…
**** what is left of me?
trembling and then the blade clutters aloof, to and fro and to
i cower from the vision of my wicked phantom,
skin stretched tight over my bones–yet do what He says, for
He makes ruin a honey-like intoxicant
omega three, anti-this anti-that, acronyms galore,
each a little dose of layers of
Him, unraveling atop my fragility
May 24, 2018
May 24, 2018 at 6:41 PM UTC
I don’t want to be you anymore.
You’re a cheap version of every Instagram trend,
and you possess more duplicity than the rest of humankind,
when you slide chameleon style through a crowd of people,
professing your love to them, while your stare hits the ground.
making it clear for the rest of us
why you’re deserted
when you talk about obscure things, knowing nobody will follow you,
disarming people from questioning your intelligens,
just so you can feel a little better than them
But it’s okay,
because you’re a hallucination of every guy’s fantasy.
A true dream catch,
who knows how to use her catch-all affect
Making you exceptional.
Your self-control is infallible.
You would never burst into tears, without a proper reason, like I do.
And your body, your face, everything is so beautiful,
In a degree that makes me desire you.
So I coat myself in your charm,
when my feet stop feeling warm
And I can’t look at myself in the mirror, after your visit.
Because I know that you would never
leave this skin undone like I do,
would never
fail these walls like I do
Yeah, it’s a shame,
that your polished plastic perfect smile
don’t cover your crooked teeth
Yeah it’s a shame,
that you can spot me through the crack between your front teeth
if the light hits just right.
And even though my Instagram photos won’t admit it,
my expectations are always more exciting than the occasion itself
And my confidence is a glass tray behind behind dark red tiles.
But you,
you don't have those problems.
Yeah, it’s a shame,
that I can’t love me as I love you
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 12:49 PM UTC
In one of our meetings,
my therapist asked
“if I have an alter ego?”
For a moment, I was shocked,
Because, the inquiry was
an anomaly.
It was out of a trend, from
of our daily sessions on the charts.
As puzzled as I was,
I sad, “no,”
For I needed not one.
Afterwards, a question triggered
into my head, too.
“What, she doesn’t know who I am?”
Then, a light flashed in my eyes
for I found my answer here.
I joined HP less than a year ago now,
and if you asked me,
the only thing that changed
about me is , I’m a year older,
with a lot of grey hairs. No joking...
I don’t have an alter ego
or multiple personality disorders.
Because, what you see is
what you get.
I love this silly me,
even when my pen loses her ruse.
Thus, in the name of naked arts
that we display on HP,
it would be much appreciated,
if people with ego issues
pass the same curtsy.
Please, don’t try to break the art code,
and infect us with your alter-ego disease,
when HP should be a community of
marching bands,
who lit flames on fire as a family,
with their pens and imaginations
around the universe.
@jobiranyc (11/16/2017)
Nov 17, 2017
Nov 17, 2017 at 12:39 AM UTC
gaga and gall are walking down the street
gaga sees some bling, gall goes in and steals
they end up in the slammer and gansta's
there to greet
gall punches gangsta and naturally gore appeals
gaga wakes from the dream, guts tries to console
he offers her an option and they both get outa' da hole
now gall, gangsta and gore while in solitary
meet with goner and good ol' grouch
glory hallelujah comes up with the key
all escaping sideways from sleeping gangeree
they keep running into gutter, introduced to giddy
all on this gollywoggle jolly hallow night
all whipped up and painted by yours truly
gimmicky.
(halloween 2016)
Oct 29, 2017
Oct 29, 2017 at 6:55 AM UTC
*The music is blasting out loud.
You can feel the bass diving into your body.
Sweating mortals, creating chaos in a crowd.
It’s here where nobody becomes somebody.
Fragile glass filled with colors of a rainbow.
The liquid’s job is to make you dizzy.
Turning strangers into people, you now know.
It’s here where lazy meets busy.
Wanting a good time but is being oddly exposed.
Intrusive questions, stirring up the tension.
Asking polite for the door to remain closed.
It’s here where admiration turns into obsession.
Light is out, except for the lighter’s flame.
Shattered bottles and broken high heels.
Skin meets ground, leading to tomorrow’s pain.
It’s here where your alter ego is truly revealed.*
May 16, 2016
May 16, 2016 at 1:23 PM UTC
I am an alter ego
just a part of someone bigger.
The part that has a voice,
some sort of confidence.
The part that makes no noise,
and that isn't conscious.
I am an alter ego;
I takeover when it's right for me.
I will never be seen,
if you see the greater me.
May 7, 2016
May 7, 2016 at 2:44 AM UTC
The winds in this cosmic land so turbulent,
They blow hard feet off the ground head spinning,
Then before you relax they change direction
Drastically always, but with improved clarity of vision
At least I can see a few minutes ahead.
Why helps accept the What
And I am in it, I fly with lost birds
Insects, bits of dried flowers, teeth and shredded notes
No smoking caterpillars to give advice
No red queens to punish and control
No rabbit to fear the ending of time
Only whispers of the Hatter
Living in both of us seeking
Uncertainty of growing into magical mystery
Called your soul. I see it, saw it in your humble accidental smile,
And we will meet again when mirrors dissipate.
My brother, sister, alter ego, strange encounter
I wish you well and you can count on that.
May 6, 2016
May 6, 2016 at 11:30 AM UTC
Red toes peak out from peep-toe laced Sperries,
heels clicking the hard-tiled floor of the dance room.
The black swan stared back from its home within her mirror,
red toes peak out from peep-toe laced Sperries.
She twirled and twirled, the swan did the same.
Each day the swan came to play, chipping the polish with every dance,
until the red toes were chipped and nearly gone.
Mar 17, 2016
Mar 17, 2016 at 1:06 AM UTC