#advertisements
And, try it!
Our new, tested, FDA approved, sharp,
weight loss injection! Or the pill!
Jump, run, play around more, for less of the cost!
Reduced body fat, reduced price!
Live like the true skinny person you are,
for only half the cost!
No personal change needed!
Just pop the pill, stab in your (fat) stomach,
and you'll be living like a leaf! ******
I'm on it, and I haven't needed to eat in
weeks! Because I'm recovered obese, now.
Drugs that make you feel less disgusting, fat, and immobile,
like you are now.
Because we're all so fat and nasty, just look at you!
Where would you be without our pill?
You NEED it to make sure you can run a mile, only on our pill.
Eat less, gain more muscle!
Less food in your body means?
More more exercise!
To get that size down, if you know what we mean!
If I'm not hungry, I'll be freed of hunger,
simple as that!
I have no self control and that makes me weak enough
to buy the pill.
To need the pill.
Still! You're fat, you're gross, everyone hates you,
nobody will love somebody who's not skin and bone and
never hungry for more.
Make a eating chart to make sure you don't starve to death.
We don't know how it works!
NOW
EAT LESS, LOVE LESS, LIVE LESS
All at a reduced cost
Because food is unnecessary if you want to be real!
And money only grows in our (not your) pockets!
May 24
May 24, 2026 at 2:45 PM UTC
Don't lose your head to gain a minute -
You need your head, your brains are in it!
Romances are wrecked before they begin,
By a hair on the coat
Or too few on the chin.
Many a forest used to stand
Where lit matches got out of hand.
Henry the eighth,
Prince of fiskers,
"Lost" five wives but kept his whiskers!
My neck was sore in front before,
And also sore behind once more.
The Cannibals took just one view,
And said,
"They look too nice to stew."
Holler! Half a pound
For half a dollar, isn't that a cheerful earful?
Hello, Druggist!
I don't mean maybe -
Yes, sir! That's the baby!
Listen. Knock on wood
When offered something "just as good."
Give the guy
The toe of your boot
Who tries to hand you a substitute!
A big improvement since the war
Is now on sale in your drug store.
He saw the train
And tried to duck it,
Kicked first the gas & then the bucket!
In seventy years of brushin' soap on,
Gramps could've painted the pentagon.
The whale put Jonah
Down the hatch,
But coughed him up because he scratched!
5-star generals & privates first class
Show equal rank in the looking glass.
Clancy's whiskers
Tickle Nancy,
Nancy lowered the boom on Clancy!
Is he lonesome or just blind-
This guy who drives so close behind?
The safest rule,
No ifs or buts,
Just drive like everyone else is nuts!
For early morning pep & bounce,
A brand new product we announce!
Train approaching,
Whistle squealing, pause!
Avoid that rundown feeling, cause!
When the stork delivers a boy,
Our whole **** factory jumps for joy.
Although insured,
Remember kiddo,
They don't pay you - they pay your widow!
May 5, 2025
May 5, 2025 at 12:32 PM UTC
~
*No malls on weekends
No feathers for tourism
No stopping to read the graffiti
No having lunch with relative hysteria
No making friends and acquaintances
In the paperless world
And no *** music
You see, the common faith is doubt
All wonder, no reason
The hole in your pocket
Becomes the hole in your head
And the last lawsuit
You'll ever need*
~
Sep 21, 2023
Sep 21, 2023 at 1:11 PM UTC
You're only pretty
If you wear this
have this
are this
You're only cool
If you smoke this
drink this
own this
You need it NOW
Before it's gone!
A new and improved you
(Until we tell you otherwise)
Jul 18, 2020
Jul 18, 2020 at 10:42 AM UTC
I'm
drowning
in light,
In blinding light:
Lights on cars; and buildings;
and lit up trees lining lit up streets;
Houses with sills all lined in gold
And diamond; silver glitter glued onto mould;
Street lamps; and laser pointers; and
Towers; neon lights dotted with flowers
Of plastic sun; hoardings and billboards,
With bright teeth and skin and red words
Everywhere you turn,
Telling you what you want
And never knew you wanted;
Shop windows; chandeliers;
Presents for that time of year;
Cell phone pylons with twinkling,
Bright lights on top, like Christmas trees;
Christmas trees, with stars and angels
Speckled, Frosted,
Dusted on the tops;
Disgusting glare on sunglasses,
And a smiting gaze along the arms;
Bridges and fountains with gold poured on;
Platinum bands in every size, laying all forlorn;
Bedside lamps; and taxis; and taxi stands;
Every window, but the ones
Being jumped off of;
TVs and refrigerators, opened
Thoughtlessly at night;
Screens shooting onto impassive glass
That used to be faces;
Cameras, going off in quick succession,
Quicker than you can keep up;
I'm drowning.
We are taught desire, in light,
We learn to read in light
and scarlet letters of fluorescence
We are blind,
Now that the road is paved for us,
To the light that was before.
Apr 5, 2016
Apr 5, 2016 at 10:20 AM UTC
This world
Is not the world our grandparents lived in
We are less connected with the natural world
Separated by televisions and computers
People who spend their lives online
Distracted by flashy adverstisements
Bombarded by commercials
Telling you why you aren't good enough
Or your life isn't easy enough
And how they can make you look better
Feel better
Be smarter
Have an easier time getting places
And doing things with less effort
We forget that how we look
Feel
And our intelligence
Might just be good enough
For you and the people around you
We need to take a break from all the consumerism
And reconnect with ourselves
And each other
To become human again
Nov 10, 2014
Nov 10, 2014 at 1:33 AM UTC