#adoptee
I often wonder about my own origin
I wonder how much of me is from just one woman
I also wonder if I am anything like the man
Does my DNA from her make me the good student I am
Does it explain my ever present sarcasm and attitude
I wonder if we have the same personality or mood
I wonder about my appearance and hers
Does her hair also fall down her back or shape her curves
Does it reflect in the same golden way that mine does
Does she also let hers grow too long just because
I know you from online
And from the few files I find
Is my height, or lack thereof, from you?
(After all, I'm only five foot two)
Do all my half siblings know of me, or just you?
Do you talk to my father? Does he want to meet too?
I meet you this week
17 years or 6,463 days
Not a moment too late
A reunion like an awkward first date
I was told to "expect nothing" from it
That I can easily call to just quit
But I know more everyday that I am ready
I want my family tree to be a little less webby
I want you to know I am not mad
I do not cry because I am sad
You are the reason I live the life I have
I cannot be more grateful for that
I understand the choice you made
That raising me was a price you had to pay
Your past is not something to regret
The questions I have are nothing to fret
You might fear the how's and why's
But they're the last thing on my mind
I just want to meet you for you
And to thank you for giving me the chance to live anew
Nov 24, 2018
Nov 24, 2018 at 11:38 PM UTC
blood of mine so far
to live the life of a double star
the constant war in my head
separate from a woman who birthed my connection thread
the days and nights spent in a deep state of trance
the wounds isolate me wanting to watch a ghost dance
must I feel like a wanderer every month?
pass by strangers while I am on a tedious hunt
o' universe teach me how to converse
so I can move on without such need to rehearse
always the outcast in my environment
people have yet to learn about my abandonment
a fragile soul I live in
I will always live with Nemo's small fin
I love ever so hard
for I know how it feels to be left scarred
blood of mine so far
to live a life of a double star
~ p o e t r y of the lost adoptee
Oct 14, 2017
Oct 14, 2017 at 2:29 PM UTC