#abroad
Soon I'll be flying to the west
Soon I'll be building my nest
Soon I'll make new connections
Soon I'll get new habits and hobbies
Soon the unknown will become familiar
Soon the strange will feel like home
Soon the empty spaces will fill with laughter
Soon the silence will be replaced by stories
But now it's time to pack
Now it's time to let go
Now it's time to say goodbye to loved ones
Right now it's time to prepare our future
Today I carry both hope and sadness
Today I honor where I came from
Today I trust the road unfolding
Today I step forward, heart open
In the future the faces I love will be farther
In the future the streets I know will fade into memory
In the future my voice will echo in new rooms
In the future I’ll miss the comfort of the old ones
Yet the past will walk beside me quietly
Yet the farewells will turn into whispers of strength
Yet the tears will water tomorrow’s roots
Yet the ache of leaving will remind me I belonged
And when the distance feels too wide
I’ll carry the warmth of every goodbye
The past and future hand in hand
A gentle reminder: I am never alone.
May 6
May 6, 2026 at 11:38 AM UTC
Glistening lights
Peek into my promising future
One you premeasured
As impossible, unsuited
My sparkling dreams
That leave me believing
But your uncertainty
Rocks me senselessly
I'm always wishing
For a world beyond my eyes
You seem unready
To dust your wings and fly
But it’s all i wanna do
I wanna hum another tune
This home you don't want to lose
But I'm alone if you don’t choose (my way)
I’ve told you before
I'll walk the path of solitude
I’m sorry, but i don’t have enough remorse
To rot away in hell with you
I’ll fall off the Golden
Before i stay holding
The place that burdens
My true feeling of purpose
You can stay here
While my ship steers
You will not hold me back
From my golden years
Stop wallowing
I’ll grasp my solid dreams
We’re growing differently
Though i love you exponentially
I’ll wish you farewell
On your journey nowhere
My name is Abroad, I’m well
I’ll hand you my care
Nov 23, 2025
Nov 23, 2025 at 11:18 AM UTC
Scattered, my heart, my soul
Amidst the painful abyss,
I find the pieces of me that were cast aside,
And I lovingly pick her up,
Put her upon my strong shoulders,
Wipe my own tears and tell her it will be over soon.
But when will it end? I sometimes ask myself.
I went abroad to try to find myself,
But I still feel lost and so different—
I feel stripped of all my identities:
of Zionism, of my family, of my homeland, of the USA, of my hometown,
of my old beliefs, my old values, of what Judaism once was for me.
But alas, I have left the religion too,
Of grieving the land of Israel–Palestine,
Because it feels like it’s grieving me.
And all of my pain, I see exemplified in their eyes,
Through the hands of the oppressors
That I was once a part of.
It all just tastes so awful—
The feeling of always being fully masked,
And then when I am unmasked,
I still don’t find my belonging.
My longing to feel aligned
Almost eats me alive.
I was bullied my whole entire life,
And the only times I ever felt relief were in my dreams.
Maybe that’s why I’ve spent the last few years sleeping it away,
Trying to get away.
But I think it’s time soon to get away and to start over—
Away from my pain, to bring it with me in my arms,
To meet it with grace, to look at myself with my own eyes,
To meet the pain of self-harm, of suicidality,
And to say, I see you.
It’s the longing to change, to not stay the same,
To want to be alive,
But to live very differently.
To choose to live.
To choose to find peace in small moments.
To choose kindness.
To choose to not be racist.
To choose love.
To choose to humanize everyone—
Especially myself and my old selves,
Who didn’t know any better.
That’s all.
Maybe it’s a letter to myself,
A letter of culmination.
I feel my age creeping on me;
I feel that I must change my life—
Not allow it to pass me by anymore.
For I am almost 29,
And I am truly away from my toxic, narcissistic past.
I don’t have to allow them to bully me anymore.
Silence is golden,
And I have power.
That’s why they have tried to **** me
And dim my spirit—
Because I am powerful.
I always thought I was weak and small,
But now I realize
That it’s my power that they saw.
So it’s my power
That I shall take back,
Once and for all.
Oct 17, 2025
Oct 17, 2025 at 1:46 PM UTC
You could go on adventures together,
Enjoying a hot cup of mulled wine,
Or just share stories sitting on a couch,
Having an infinite amount of joy
Spreading bullsh1t 10000 km away,
Finding secret codes, creating phrases.
Some threads work in close range,
Or they stretch out a far distance,
Tying with friends, new or old alike,
They melt the rock ice beneath,
Within the reach of your finite souls,
Exploring the walls of a finite home.
They bring fire in your heart,
Making it want more and more
Thirsty of the whole endless world.
Feb 2, 2024
Feb 2, 2024 at 11:24 PM UTC
once you were gone i stopped writing
and hand in hand with the words unpoken
left the wholeness you had planted in my heart
when you turned around i could see snowflakes imprinted on your back
staring daringly at the little tree growing in my chest
i tried to protect and nurture the words in my brain
that after all were just the leaves of what had once been a seed in the form of a single look
the cold that filled your absence
froze the river that had watered my mind
and each leaf one by one turned yellow then brown before it sank to the bottom of it all
left naked and vulnerable, the tree, it died as the did the words
while i watched the sun and warmth that you embodied get into a car
and drive away without looking back
Sep 1, 2020
Sep 1, 2020 at 8:13 AM UTC
everything happened so fast
we cried
i left
and just like that
it was all over
like we hadn't meant anything
as if we hadn't loved each other
it was nobody's fault
except for maybe life's
we had promised to stay together
a promise we couldn't keep
i wonder whether i am the villan
you stayed behind waiting
miserable is all you were
i couldn't watch
and he made it so easy
easy to forget
how much i loved you
despite the ocean between us
you saw me being happy
and you hated him for it
and i hated you
for not wanting me to be
you made my life colorful
it all faded without you
i was scared of the dull grey
and he sparked a fire, brought light
it felt like being saved
how unfair to want that
i disgust myself
Aug 19, 2020
Aug 19, 2020 at 5:07 PM UTC
We slump,
cracks in the cumin seed siding
outside the police station,
stale air suffocates the sun
as it sinks below
a creek and a trash heap
visa papers
clutched like the cloak of God,
a 100 rupee note crumbled in your jean pocket -
just in case.
is it a crime to expect the worst
in spite of order?
blazing dry heat smothers our lungs,
we resemble
shrunken palm leaves held only
by the stone above us.
Jul 9, 2020
Jul 9, 2020 at 6:15 AM UTC
no one tells you
being an immigrant
is being a stallion
front hooves tied knotted
course rope
chaffing at your ankles
holed up in a greener pasture
gnawing at tender leaves
while watching
acres away
those you love
wild and free, wind
whistling against their cheeks,
a throbbing ache to be with them
but knowing you cannot.
Jun 25, 2020
Jun 25, 2020 at 6:24 AM UTC
day and night
my thoughts are running in circles around you
at the break of dawn
i recall every minute, every second, every breath, every touch
when the sun sets
my brain conjures new memories
intertwining the real and the imaginery
afraid of letting you go completely
scared i might forget
the pierce of your brown eyes, the intensity of your cologne mixed with the scent of a gin tonic, the food stain on your pink hoodie, the raspiness in your voice
when you told me you needed me too
i know you have left
but does that mean you are really gone?
May 25, 2020
May 25, 2020 at 3:55 PM UTC
Queuing at the airport the flights non-stop
Off to Benidorm in a football top
Pants three quarter, tattooed arms
Overweight Wife with ample charms
Check-in complete & straight to the bar
It’s only 6am but they don’t care
Their duty free stuffed in to Lidl bags
***** whisky & 400 ****
They’re now half cut & the kids start to cry
They board the plane & they sit nearby
A 2hr flight with the family from hell
Hoping they’re not staying at your hotel
You’re all on the coach now & on your way
They smell of cigarettes & body spray
He turns around in a right old state
And slurs at you ‘Where ya staying mate’?
Through gritted teeth and raw contempt
You tell him the El President
‘Same as us’ he says with pride
Stretching his pants to squeeze his gut inside
The El President has lost its charm
My wife looks forlorn as she grabs my arm
As in the lobby with kids aloft
Are 100 more slobs in their football tops..
May 24, 2020
May 24, 2020 at 6:04 AM UTC
right outside our tiny refuge
lives a magnolia tree
strong and beautiful
blossoming only for a handful of days
we find its beauty in pastel colors so brief yet breathtaking
to be adored year after year without fail
only in the perfect spot will a magnolia thrive, your grandma says
how do you know whether you've found it?, i ask
you don't until you plant it, you answer
May 5, 2020
May 5, 2020 at 4:14 PM UTC
a little breeze
tickles the back of my neck
missing a scarf
just to feel the winter air
uneven ground
endless bumps under my feet
puffs of smoke
attack my lungs consistently
miles a day
building muscles and endurance
birds everywhere
truly are the rats of the sky
coffee con leche
makes me miss home even more
foreign words
understanding bit of conversations
room with two beds
proof of a difficult time here
sky below
finally flying back to my world
Dec 5, 2019
Dec 5, 2019 at 3:05 PM UTC
I will miss the quiet, selfish nights,
spent among books and TV and music.
I will miss missing home
while feeling at home
in a foreign country.
I will miss my time being my own
to split between friendships, travel, or nothing.
I will miss the feeling of my own body,
free from the dirt of past indiscretions.
Free to be myself,
foreign though I may be.
Jan 7, 2019
Jan 7, 2019 at 7:17 PM UTC
In response to
The posts
From friends, abroad
What clicks inside is
To ask,
What time is there?
Yes
What time is there?
Nothing more
Dec 2, 2018
Dec 2, 2018 at 4:10 AM UTC
poking at his rib cage
i thought of all of the wonderful times
ive spent with him
not knowing that this would be my last time poking his rib cage
i smiled and laughed in his face
he loved me the way i loved me
or so i thought
and the betrayal finally set in
when the messages stopped flowing in
and the block on all of social media shocked me as well
until my friend had shown that while you were studying abroad
you were going steady with a beautiful french girl
Oct 31, 2018
Oct 31, 2018 at 7:01 AM UTC
A teary farewell at the Airport,
Fake 'good'bye's from heavy Hearts,
Bags filled with memories from the Past,
Cruising over the seven Seas,
A new journey with emotions Galore.
A land promising a colorful Future,
fulfilling every need and Desire,
In exchange of a simple Contract,
Unlearn the ways of the land I Belong,
For I am the square peg in the round Hole.
Burning the midnight Oil,
Stale bread and a cup Noodles,
Celebrating festivals through a tiny screen,
a fake smile masking every tear,
Where's the silver lining amid the toil ?
Oh how the hard work has flourished,
certified successful as defined by society,
smiling at the acquired Possessions,
To realize materials never smiled back,
I am now the round peg without a Soul.
Oct 23, 2018
Oct 23, 2018 at 9:51 AM UTC
I am drinking water that is meant for the plants
I am singing songs I used to sing for my dog
but she’s dead now
and I talk to myself while I scrub greasy pans,
read messages but never answer.
my vocabulary doesn’t stretch the length of expectations
by now I know that my silence sends the right message,
clearer than my hand-picked words
when I feel my blood boil and my brain lunge to keep up
I shut up.
they are just waiting to speak
at me and
I am just trying to sleep
Sep 25, 2018
Sep 25, 2018 at 9:06 PM UTC
My weapon is voice today
'tis careless
a spell amoungst curs
it puts close friends in their places
and worried
(behind my back)
It kisses with mischeif
and muddies stray-fully
My weapon is played
a trial
a tool
to bring about my isolation
Then i may exit without notice
and unfollowed
a relief, in release
My real work shall begin abroad
Aug 11, 2018
Aug 11, 2018 at 1:07 AM UTC
We're here now,
and theres more than the two of us.
But there's one feeling, and the same ache
yet different struggles
- * -
We all think the same things,
yet in different tongues.
The histories do not include us.
Our taste buds have had to adapt to the wind here,
we have learnt from the best of the chameleons.
- * -
It's the same stage set up and the curtains were never drawn,
but our eyes see a completely different story being played out.
Collective whispers greater than a shout.
Peace of mind has been a while, it'll take long...
Home isn't where the heart is, when the heart keeps moving around.
Mar 26, 2018
Mar 26, 2018 at 4:52 PM UTC
Falling out of distracting thoughts
he reacquainted with his glare in the mirror;
he'd been somewhere else, undoubtedly lost
in a moment of her.
She too was standing in front of a mirror,
putting her face on, yet the occasion was stained
with an uncharacteristic frown, as if sadness
had found her somehow.
After many anxious intakes of breath,
he reached for the door-keys lain by the trinket box
next to their photograph. He cradled
the apartment keys in his palms for a brief moment,
then went on his way.
She stared at their joyful pictures on her wall,
a shrine with each an expression of love.
She clutched his name on the key fob and left also.
That evening in the restaurant,
her eyes glued to his as intensely as her hands
pursing through the gaps in his fingers;
two sizes too big.
He reciprocated warm heartfelt smiles,
trying to keep it together for both of them.
Circling his thumb gently on pressed fingers.
Her accented cadence a perfume for the ears
and her broken English endearing;
this would all haunt him,
these details tearing at the pit of his stomach
as he languished in the reality
that he has no choice. He must return home.
Over the balcony
wrapped in her anaconda-like arms,
he witnessed her cheeks
tear-staining in the moonlight,
her whimpers battling the lulling tides and cricket chorus.
She crumpled as a strewn napkin against his frame,
before exchanging a kiss;
soft and lovingly endured. The very kiss that wishes
not to end but to stay this way forever.
How melancholy it was in the sea breeze,
to walk among their favourite spot on the beach;
where many an anecdote was told,
many a sweet little nothing shared
and many a glance embraced.
Right now with the hush of salt water
lapping the shore;
their 'Last chance to see' had been studied.
In that instant, both knew
that it couldn't be possible to have
one another again.
They stood for a long while by the waters edge.
Both just as broken,
before becoming ghosts of the scene
and ghosts to each other.
May 19, 2017
May 19, 2017 at 6:54 PM UTC
Tomorrow,
I leave
and dear
I'm afraid
that you
won't
miss me
Cause I
know I'll
think of
your guitar,
your hands
my hands
your laugh,
and dance
Cause I
know I'll
listen to
your music
when I'm
homesick
or else try
to remember
your eyes,
your words
But will you
miss my piano,
my hands
your hands
my laugh,
my car
will you phone me
just to hear
my voice again
Will we even
Say goodbye
Do we have to
Or have we
already
Dec 19, 2016
Dec 19, 2016 at 12:35 AM UTC