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#171
I've reached the point where all I want to do is scream; curse the world; cry until no tears are left. Girls who told me lies: "no boy will come between us" "we're friends forever." How silly of me to think they meant those bound words? My heart hurts because of them I loved them like kin But how quickly they've left me because of a bruise: a small mark on my neck's side. It's just a hickey. But they don't want to be friends with a **** like me. It's not my fault they're lonely not my fault I'm loved. I want to blame jealousy, but I'm just running to the arms of Patriarch crying in His sleeve begging for His forgiveness. Because this hickey, the same ****** mark as scratches on men's backs, marks me as a ***** **** and him as a man. But we're friends forever, right? Or was that before I had the gall to love him? But that shouldn't matter, right? Because something like a boy won't separate us. How stupid am I to actually believe I thought I found friends? Girls are such terrible things we deal in weapons of silence, gossip, and blame: things that do not show things that will bleed the heart dry. My heart is bleeding out: D  R  Y
0
Jul 28, 2014
Jul 28, 2014 at 7:43 PM UTC
An Angry Shout into the Void (Choka)
The conversation went like this: J: "Hello daughter" (It's an inside joke, we have a whole family tree :) Me: [Looks at J] J: "uh, Son" L: "Son!" L: [Smiles and hugs me real tight] (L is trans too) J: "How dare you ignore your mother" Me: [Hugs J too] Us: [Laugh]
0
Sep 2, 2019
Sep 2, 2019 at 2:57 PM UTC
Note 171: