you know what's creepy about humpty dumpty? they never said it was an egg
don't you dare sounds normal, but do not you dare sounds weird
envelopes are strange. its like here's a paper wrapped in paper that i sealed with my saliva
butter is food lotion
when you wait for the waiter you are the waiter
How much pain do I have go though until giving up is okay?
Wait until you’re called!
why are you fidgeting?!
The kid with the beard and the ***** apron,
he's just trying to make it.
His shoes have small tears on the sides,
from the way water saturates and weakens the material.
He’s got this way of gliding from table to table,
the same way a dancer owns a stage.
He slides plates of salt-ridden tacos currently in vogue
to a roomful of overfed, undersexed office drones
A woman in a skirt and flip-flops rolls her eyes at a salad.
A ******* in a blazer flicks a ****** under the table.
Still, there's a twinkle in the kid’s eyes,
like he's on the make.
If the right circumstances unfold
he’d snag a loose twenty
from a wallet or a purse.
This is the server's life,
always under the thumb,
hated and stressed,
but always laughing
at the end
of each shift.
Based on experience.
My uniforms the same color as the napkins
My shoes are all covered in muck
The knife goes on the right side of the plate facing in
I'm starting to not give a ****
There's gum on the bottom of the tables
The foreigners tip me in dimes
This place is a ghost town on lunch shifts
So I sit at the bar cutting limes
If this double shift doesn't end soon
And the manager asks me to close
It's 4 am be back in 6 hours
Mid day ghost town doing fold ups and rolls
Does the steak best pair with the red or the white?
Do I look like one who tends to fine dine?
I'll just make some **** up to impress for a tip
And pray to God Facebook thinks I'm doing fine
I am NOT doing fine
First poem on here.
that comes from
that we are all the same
and it's not happiness
but the disheveled,
who launders around tables.
Being treated poorly
that can't even
take the hands of time
to read the name
of a person that serves them life
the succulent roasted pork
with a side salad
or a bowl of broccoli soup
have more in common with
our suffering waiter
than the illiterate people.
What's their name?
You need to know something --
I cant wait forever
I can serve food
But I'm not a waiter
I am a human
I get bored too
Waiting for someone
Uncertain, like you
You say you're scared
But am I not too?
If you really want it,
You'd take a risk or two
Take a risk in me
Take a risk with me
Let's see what we got
If it's worth a shot
I've been waiting for you
For what seems like forever
I can't keep running back
When you call me whenever
I know I've said bye
A million of times
But this one would be
The very last time
BYE BITCHEZSSZZZ dats d motto niqqa YOLoOooOo000
Have you ever seen it rain cats and dogs
How about a dumb bell or dumb waiter
Or a road runner
Have you ever seen a blue whale
Maybe he's just depressed
How about a stool pigeon
Or is it a pigeon stool
I have seen a mocking bird
They are loud , obnoxious , and on my
Mailbox they leave . . . (rhymes with words)
A temporary permanent
How about a hot plate , yeah me too !
Or a cat on a hot tin roof
A mega phone (probably not portable)
Or walk down the up escalator
A bat out of Hell
Naw , I prefer fried chicken fingers
— The End —