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cleann98 Jan 2019
It never was my fault
   You never learned how
  To swim.

How can you blame me
       Now that you’re drowning?

If all you have
Are empty bottles
And half an empty
Can of glade...
       What is a broken heart
            In your eyes?

    Pitiful

           You don’t even have
     Broken shards
         And poisoned drops—

  So make sure
      Before you
    Start pointing
         Shaking fingers
       You know
  How to make
          A clean cut first.
deeper cuts=deeper love?

*originally published at my alter account. it's dead now.
Thorns Jan 2019
Don't you just feel like that sometimes
Like you just want to fall over dead
bleh
But it's not that easy
Nothing is
Well, except pulling the trigger :]
mars Jan 2019
I can wash my bedsheets a thousand times and yet this bed is no longer ******* mine
Victor James Jan 2019
I simply saw it as punishment for my sins
It's why I never noticed the darkness creeping in
My stressed mind had all my defenses down
That is how the darkness was able to get around
And now every night I'm plagued by the thoughts
That can only seem to be controlled by swallowing shots
Why is it when I'm surrounded I feel most alone
Yet I'm scared of myself when I'm on my own
This darkness began to overtake my mind last autumn
At this point I fear I've hit rock bottom
Because now I'm sitting with a knife to my wrist
Thinking that death would be true bliss
I'm left on my own my eyes glistening
hoping that somebody somewhere is listening
every night the darkness corrupts my dreams
I call to my family and friends with silent screams
Everyday I drive into the city
trying to drown my sorrow in a bottle of whiskey
or with guy night after night
I no longer bother even putting up a fight
Back in my apartment in room 955
wondering what it means to truly be alive
I realize I've been dead my whole life
so i finally set down this cruel knife
I reach for a gun and lay in my bed
The last feeling I had was cold steel to my head
Trigger Warning: Suicide
I avoid the ocean,
The waves may crush these bones-
I stay safe upon the shore.

Although I may have loved to swim,

At the beach,
My feet,

Remain in the snow.
Natasha Dec 2018
Throats hoarsen with daggered insults
A plea for control –
A threat of death–
A trust long frayed.

One arm reaches for the other
And uses it as a batting ram
A steady. beat.
Impounding on a vacuumed. chest.

And when hours pass
And scars are painted over
She provides flesh on a porcelain platter–
An apology for mistakes never made
She stares blankly beneath the sheets
And screams.
But hoarse throats make no sound.
Lurid pressure in perfect hiding,

Heat rises amidst quiet timing.

Covers conceal fingers,
And skin conceals-

Well,

Only from the blinded.

Flitting breath from lungs to neck,

Begging tongue,
And baiting breast.

Tentative flesh,
Upon tentative flesh,

What comes next?

Anything I want,

If this is,

Yes.
Don't judge my #'s
SimpleWritings Dec 2018
i hate my life
i hate myself
i’m not good enough
i’m not strong enough
i don’t see a point in living
i don’t see a future for myself
i’m a waste of space
i’m just a breathing vegetable
i don’t want to do that anymore
i don’t want help
i can’t get better
i’ve seen too much
i’ve felt too much
i can’t take it anymore
i can’t keep pretending
i’m not ok
i’m so not ok
i’m weak
and tired
i was a mistake
i was never meant to be here
i refuse to stay and watch my life get worse
i will never be happy
i want to end it

06/12/2018
Sketcher Dec 2018
Anxiety ******* tearing up inside of me. ***** ******* **** with some *** stained cavities and now shes coming onto me entirely. I should be like finally, but instead the anxious brain of mine avoids the blankets and gravitates towards the rhyme cause reality... what the **** is reality? My extended ****** up morality, apprehending the shortness of mortality or all these sexualities?
He, she, they, them.
See me hock phlegm.
Maybe stock them.
Lay low till' ten.
And then when,
They stop,
My pen cap,
Pops off,
Stabs lead into the head of the said ***, already wishing they were dead, but the use of a mag would cause attention, so I'm carrying a handbag full of pens. This is my pencil pushing, pen pushing straight into the gay neck, rushing to **** the wreck of a man and get paid through bills or a check again.

From my anxiety to killing gays, cause I'm willing to get lost in my ways of letting my mind wander, even though I kind of wonder why the gays were on my mind. The ***** that broke my heart was bi, but that's fine. I got nothing against you, unless you hurt me or the ones I love. You get two feet up your *** at once if you harm or speak bad about any of us.
Coping with heartbreak and for some reason I'm in an angry stage. For two months it was nothing but sadness and then one day, BAM!, anger burst through and I'm **** ******.
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