The sun is hot
The birds all flock

The boats convene
Revelers serene

The drinks are cool
They make you drool

The wind blows soft
White sails aloft

Sleek Dolphins jump
The water thump

Our faces smile
For quite a while

This is the life
No thoughts of strife

Our own cocoon
Our sun - our moon

For just this while
We live in style

But all too soon
We're not immune

From noise and sound
Our senses pound

Reality hits back
Our peace off track

And yet we smile
For but a while

Thoughts of that day
When we might say

The sun is hot
The birds all flock

The boats convene
Revelers serene

sand exasperatingly tickles skin
as waves roaringly crashes upon it
a deafening wind agitates hair
as it rumbles through air
                   in all its chaos
                                       I find tranquillity

So long ago was the wonder turned to real by the Eagle flying by.
A child in awe I watched that miracle outside of Earth's blue sky.

In grainy black and white the world united in an up turned gaze.
To dream a unified dream for all, in those long ago heroic days.

A dream for all of mankind and your words they called it so.
Joint in belief of great achievement of how far our species could go.

You carried the heroes of a decade that paved a road up to that day.
You caught the minds of others and set new heroes on their way.

There was Mike and Buzz and you and yet others there would be.
Who would follow that first footstep that you left upon the sea.

It's the quietest time of night
Where the moon has peaked
All is hushed
And you're supposed to be asleep

But your mind plays games
Making noise that keep you awake
Mocking your restlessness and fears
Little monsters play tug-of-war
And swing from moonlit chandeliers

I Find comfort in the dark
A pitch black tranquility
But little monsters search for a thought
To keep me awake unwillingly

Heart steadies like the sea
Holding on to the evanescent dreams
Waiting for the pounce of little feet
Jumping on on you like a trampoline

They've finally tuckered themselves out
From running about
They curl up beside me
And count their sheep
Beside little monsters
I sleep

Behind that composed look.
Behind all of those shades.
.....................There is me.
A traveller on a journey.
Searching for more.
For a meaning of some sort .
Searching for peace & tranquility.
Love, devotion & all that's in between.

There is peace to find
In this world so wide.
Where is it, you ask?
Intimacy with the Creator.

There really is nothing more meaningful than to wander around,
In a park,
Amongst trees and flowers and some squirrels,
Some people here and there,
Some rays of sunlight piercing through the leaves and caressing the skin of those
Who wonder around, in a park, amongst trees and flowers and squirrels.
Some gentle rain makes it even more divinely peaceful,
But it may sadden and soak some of those
Who wonder around, in a park, amongst tall and short trees,
Colourful flowers and plainly green grass,
With squirrels jumping around and curious about these giants.
Nothing,
And everything, at the same time,
Are the feelings of those who wander around, in a park,
Stopping somewhere a moment to appreciate nature, bending somewhere else to hurt a flower.
They are able to tell everything to whomever they are walking with,
Those who wander around a park, without a clear destination,
Conscious that they will have to cross a gate to get out
And they will lose every bit of pleasure gained throughout such walk.
Many people kiss in parks,
And lay on the grass,
As if it were a private room, with invisible wall,
Or thinking that no-one else wanders around,
In a park, looking for happiness and tranquillity.

Now these fake laughs surround me like miseries
Asking why I am not smiling anymore.
If I am sick are there is any problem in my life.
How do I tell-
There was something hurting me, before
But you never bothered to know,
Because I was smiling all the time.
Became one of you.
That's all I was-
A ******* (Fake smile) curl of lips not reaching my eyes.
Getting paid for it.

Now that I am me.
You can't take it anymore.
Why?
Guess it's not what you wanted me to be.
It's not up to the standards of this beautiful society.

The society Where are never belong to.
Never wanted to be a part of.
And when I talk to people,
They don't like it either.
Then who decides that we have to be here.

Part of something which is huge,
But no one wants to be a part of.

{ Like each drop of the river is running to be a part of the ocean,
Because it doesn't want to be where it is,
Dreams about the ocean and how it would be a happy place.
Only to know the reality once it is there.
Then the Drop leaves all the hope and drowns itself in the surrounding water.}


But if everyone is forced
Why don't we just leave it?
Let's have our own societies
Owned by each of us.
With rules made by us
Our own.

Too rebellious - they say.
You are a part of this you can't go.
Where did I sign- when- I ask.
No answers.
Only Rules to follow.

I wanted to breathe- fresh air
They close all the windows.
And make me breathe the stink-
Of their bodies, my body
And tell me this is heaven,
To be blessed with all this beauty,
All these people around me-
Friends, Families, Relatives, Neighbors.

How do I tell-
Our heavens are different.
My heaven consists of me,
My melancholy and my sad soul.
Noooooooo - they cried.
No that's hell.
You can't go there.
You are too naive to know the difference.
We are here to guide you,
Help you know the better.
Really?
Then,
Where were you?
When I was feeling crushed,
By the weight of my fake happy soul,
Which wasn't mine,
But borrowed from you,
One of yours, fake souls,
Which also died of their own weight.
Pretending is heavy.
Very heavy.
Not for everyone.

Why didn't you come and help me?
When my soul was crying a river,
Teardrops of my blood, painful.
Cutting through all the way.
Wherever it fell.
Leaving a scar and a Burn.
As Black as my fake white painted black soul.

Did you see it? Did you?
No. You were busy putting the Angelic white on it whenever you saw it turning Grey, because of the real color it was holding.

You were happy with the outcome.
It was what you wanted.
What I was supposed to be.
I was expected to like it.
But how do I do that?
Especially when at the end of the day when I am on my bed.
And I try to take the skin off,
And remove the soul so it can take some rest.
But as soon as it is away from the fake smile- happy- peel of the skin.
It turns black- all jet black, within a nanosecond.

Then I try to cover it,
So that no one sees it.
And I can't sleep, because of the fear of getting caught.

You told me, I don't need to be afraid of anything
As long as I believed in HIM
But you taught me to be scared of you. Funny.
How it all works, if it pleases you.

I was screaming,
But you didn't ask me - What happened?
I wanted to be heard,
For once at least.
But I never said anything.
Because I am supposed to follow, no questions.

He said- you are sad,
Because I was upset.
Because you love me, care about me.
So I should be happy.
In order to keep YOU happy.
You do not understand - it's a big favor to ask for. Do you?
Take away someone's sorrow, - someone's genuine state of mind.
My gift from HIM.

I tried - I tried hard.
To do things the way you want.
Write happy stories.
Sing cheerful songs.
Keep that upward curl on my lips.
Putting on my red lipstick,
And my black high heels.
Walking as a Lady should.
Rhyming my poetry as far as I could.
Even if it took away the essence,
Just to please you.
To be a part of something I never really wanted to be a part of.
Only to lead to my Paranoia.
Which I got because of you.
Now Taking all my medicines
To keep all my thoughts away.
To please you once more.
Because my thoughts are what would destroy me( as per you)
Maybe it will destroy you.
Because I see that fear on your face.
Whereas I am not scared of destruction and death?
I yearn for them.
to lose everything I own,
Is my dream.
Which you tell me to be scared of.

Now I see that fear clearly on your face.
You taught me to be afraid of you.
Because in reality you were scared of me.
My dark thoughts.
My pure black innocent soul.
Just because I didn't fit your rules.



Now You can see me walk away from you, your people.
I am walking with my head up.
Broadening shoulders, confident.
A smile - not the fake one this time.
And my black soul along with me.
It is sad as usual.
But I have embraced it.
Because that's the way it was made to be.

Now you all watch me go
As I live a happy life with my sad soul.