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My throat closes

Every single time

When I want to speak or let myself be heard, I close

I let others speak for me. In whistling tunes I found through the Tube or stories as told by those who live them

I find it is not my time to speak.

For only when I am utmost alone can I even utter a single sigh and still it displeases me of its occurrence

Perhaps voiceless to allow others the space they might need to be themselves. So why am I upset of it

Meek and meager
Never there when you need her
Your silence is louder than a train wreck.
Osiria Melody Mar 2019
"Smoke ****, not cigarettes."
stood the calmness in your chest.
inhale the soothing, healthy greens.

fall awake in a state of mind where
time never stays to sleep.
energize me with the raspy air,
gasping for more of another hit.
it doesn't botha me that you're chill
like that.

5 AM, get up like light never knew
how to glow.
swim in your pool of thoughts until
you think your brain will rot.
feelin' a bit hungry, so eat mountains
of calories.

12 PM, choreography of rolling another
blunt: step 1, 2, 3....
pass on the soothing healthy greens to
it doesn't botha me that you're chill like

your eyes are watery and bloodshot like
the capillaries, arteries, veins in my body.
5 PM hits with red rose petals blazing
brighter than red: what color is that?

feelin' a bit tired, but there's no need to
count sheep when you could count the
cigarettes that you never kissed again.

To my dear friend (who stated the words that
I quoted),
I am not mocking your words. My artistic mind caught fire and this piece was salvaged from the ashes of my creativity. What you said impacted me so much that I felt like writing this piece. Everything's fabricated, except for your words that I quoted.
Broadsky Jan 2019
You make my head feel like I've been pounding it against a concrete wall, how many hands do I need to count the number of people I share you with? You make my hands shake, you make my heart race like a train, you're the conductor and we're derailing from the tracks as we speak.
December 16, 2014
Madhumita Apr 2018
Mine, mine, mine –
the pain is mine,
I can bear it.

Mine, mine, mine –
The shame is mine,
I can wear it.

Feel the brittle glass,
a couple of knocks
and it will shatter.

I have a spine of steel,
throw your rocks,
it doesn’t matter.

Watch me burn,
with cool disdain,
I won’t bemoan it.

This trainwreck is mine,
my hellfire to maintain,
witness how I own it.
Ace Jeremy Aug 2017
I want to ask the questions on my mind
But I know they'll lead to a fight
And maybe even losing you
So I sit silent waiting for the call to end
Wanting to keep you by my side no matter what

I don't know what to do
So I let my mind go
Letting it lead me deep into nothingness
Hiding me from view

Tomorrow I will emerge happy
Holding on again

Every now and again my grip on reality falters
Sleep brings it back
Then I hide again
From anything that will make me lose you

One day
I asked you to call me soldier
Because it makes me feel stronger than what I am
I'm pure muscle
But my mind is slipping
Weakness around every corner

I won't let go
But I may falter
I just need someone by my side
Someone willing to pick me up
And ride along with my train wrecked mind
I needed to speak but couldn't make it sound good, so I wrote a train wreck of a poem to compensate.
Jewbarremore Apr 2016
He’s riding local
While she’s riding express
Both on the same level
Thoughts of freedom race through
One breaks down
While one zooms away
But for a brief second they both open
Let lose their insecurities and opened up their dreams
Out of everyone in the sea their eyes meet
For a moment life was still
Cupid never hit a couple so alike before
Just as he was swimming to start a life filled with pure love and freedom
Train wreck to his and her train of thought
And there dies a dream in the city of dreams
Their thought process is thought differently but they are still the same thoughts. Who knows true love can be at eyes first meet?
emily grace Feb 2016
i'm a trainwreck, baby
so crash into me
we'll leave our baggage here
under the debris

take my hand and don't look back
the fire burns bright, now
we'll never have to question
or how

just us in this space
before our lips finally meet
our legs intertwining
retaining body heat
Cayla frazier Oct 2015
Who am I?
Who should I be?
Why cant I find my place in world full

I know that I'm everyone's cup of tea,
more like the tea bag just feeling used.

I pray for peace and self acceptance.
Knowing I need to love me before I can
find where I truly need to be.

Pulling in different directions
barely holding on, my strength depleting.

I'm weak and so tired,
just wanna fold into myself until
it all passes. but the darkness there
can be deafening too.

Selena Jance Jan 2015
Sees the
coming, watches
it pass

Neon lights Oct 2014
I can't recall what the pale moonlight brought upon us
The demise of everything, everyone we're holding on for
was sent to us by the remnants of
their comatose ghosts.

We woke up to a trainwreck next to our window and
Many of us is sick of this because they see it everytime daylight come everytime their
eyes are unfolded.
They got used to this silent commotion but
I'm not immuned to this for up to this day I
woke up just to tell myself that
this is an illusory and go back to sleep,
anticipate in melancholic dreams until my grim fate come taking me to somewhere

No one. Not even you
or her
or him
tried to reprimand this delusion on mine
until I was nothing.
Nothing but a corpse.
I spent a lifetime hiding from reality away from this
sick world
I locked myself in a ******* prison I created myself and threw the ******* key straight to hell.

And you.
All of you just watch me burn no one told me I was engulfed in kerosene and that the flames
are catching up with me and I
I could've survived.

Well, today came and all I know is that I'm an another trainwreck stranded beside
a stranger bedroom window
I'm her nightmare I'm becoming my fear this is all becaused of your promises that you'll be there
saving me from every harm but you didn't tell me I was the menace (oh how could you save me from my own self?)
You watched me burn with a smile spreading on your face

Just try and sa--
I wrote this in anger

— The End —