How does one free themselves of Aphrodite’s sly paradox of still loving the one who broke their heart ?

Love that preserves beyond the break
is a measure
of the authentic tether
felt by the depths of the heart.

Every conscious step I make
towards a new future, beyond the girl who
felt like a soulmate,
feels like the break
of a promise.

Pinky swear was the old charming mantra.

I move ahead.
Yet I still have to tread on the familiar grounds we once said
our I love yous.

Memory lane.

Sometimes I choose the painful path,
looking through pictures before Loves pain,
a consolation of sorts
to know it was real
and not that of a dream.

Romeo’s lips uttered dreams are nothing but vain fantasy,
but at least I have the memory.

The ghost of you follows me,
uninvited into my reverie
so vividly
no matter how hard I try to release the heartache of you and me.

I’ll keep trying,
until one day it becomes a fond reminiscent memory of what once was and no longer,
trudging through the graveyard
until the light brings fonder
and my heart may wander anew.

Down the corridor of your mind are many doors
Who knows what lies behind them?
Life makes you choose.
In youth, hungry to win, afraid to lose
Not wanting to disappoint, and eager to please
You open them with ease.

Some bring you failure, or its twin, success
Some seem a certainty, others a guess
You find many unimportant
Or only means to ends
Behind some lie enemies,
A precious few hide friends.

The trip down this corridor is a test
To prove to yourself you have what it takes
Focusing on your goal, ignoring the rest
Savouring your victories, exposing mistakes
You press on to be best.

At some point down this corridor, far from the start
When you least expect
A new door opens to a journey apart
You meet someone and suddenly connect
And are led down the corridor of the heart.

This new corridor is different though,
Its journey lifelong
Behind each door lessons are learned
New emotions you couldn’t know
Right and wrong the hard way earned
Daily paid as feelings grow.


These emotions conflict as inside you change
You feel joy and doubt,
Contentment and pain,
The bitterness of loss and the sweetness of gain
As solutions somehow work themselves out

In this corridor decisions count
Both when taken and later
As consequences mount
There are no victories, no defeats
No false starts, no repeats
Only the experience of life made greater.

In this corridor you go forward and remember back
Old scars heal
When new feelings take their place
Showing little behind a public face
While inside you alone can know
That like your inner thoughts, each scar is real.

The corridor of the heart leads to love
But there is a price to be paid
For its end is the sum of all decisions made
Of the anger you have felt
Or the hurt you’ve been dealt
Of all words good and bad you’ve said.

But whatever the price this corridor exacts
Through what is in your grasp
Or beyond your control
Without the sum of all its acts
Your human life would not be whole
For the corridor of the heart leads to your soul.


Kew, England  March 1998

Resentment and anger, hurt and despair,
Loss of a hope that is no longer there,
Suddenly recognize you’ve grown apart,
Some of the feelings that will freeze a heart.

When pain is worse than not feeling at all,
Love at your door but you won’t heed its call,
Deny your feelings—you won’t be controlled,
You give it all up and make your heart cold.

You harden your heart to keep the pain out,
Emotions are things you’ll just do without,
You’re frozen and it seems small sacrifice,
You think you’re safer if you turn to ice.

You need to embrace the pain in your way,
Process those feelings and cry them away,
Trying to be icy cold is faulty,
Melting your pain is why tears are salty.

When the solo is not that great
But the groove is unmistakable
You know where love lives
It's not in a lawyer's brief case

When the brush cuts into the canvas
There is nothing but blood to spill
You can't ask him to paint a jail cell
Or children crying unless that's the point

Don't ask a poet not to care
Don't ask an artist to be afraid

Don't ask
Don't ask
Don't ask

Don't ask except why children are hungry
Don't ask except why does a soldier have to die

When the words play music in your heart
There is nothing left but to listen
There is no greed or lust for gold
Only the truth of God's commands

Don't ask
Don't ask
Don't ask

There is no argument
There is no debate
There is no wall
There is no question

It is so peculiar of man to desire imperfect,
But that's just the way to getting perfect,
In the quest of love,
We only never find what we seek,
Pride squanders what we desire most,
No accolade will pride bestow,
As love wont emerge to your blind soul.
For as long as you soar as Eagles,
The fattest Mice will be for Owls of the dark.
Love is stronger than pride,
Though pride soars great heights,
Love grows even when a man is dying,
Pride never. Except your pride despair,
Love being greatest to you shall never be fair.

He saw me looking,
He smiled,and for a moment I was the young untainted flower.
Never been touched and seeing the world for the first time.

He felt it,
It was undeniable,so pristine,
Drawn to each other we were.

He was my sweet, tall,pure dark piece of awesomeness,
And yes I gave in,
I caved,
I had fallen.

He told me I finally defined clarity,
That I was his blackStar,
With his sultry voice,I believed.

I was lost but yet found,
Euphoria.
Reality had nothing on me.

A flower I was,
Him the water that kept me beautiful as ever.

Then he said it,
I did not believe it,
He said it again,
This time I heard it right.

The pain,
The hurt
The anguish.
It crumbled.

"No it's  not you,it's me."
He said.
"I'm sorry"
He said.

the Salty liquid took its course,
"It's okay" I said.

But why?
Why?
I licked my wound like the wounded Animal I was.

I healed,and was reborn,
And now am on it AGAIN,like it never happened.