deep and warm
soft and strong
calm and exhilarating
wide open spaces
holding and swaying
laughing and **praying
I feel the strength of your love now so much better, as of yesterday, I'm not sure why. I think our disagreement, and your good reaction to it, may have been the reason.
Honestly, I wasn't sure about us on Thursday. I was thinking I needed someone a little more crazy like me, but then I was giving my brother Gabe some advice on Friday. He said he felt like he needed to marry a girl as crazy as him, and I told him he didn't need a crazy girl, just a girl happy to go on adventure with him. That made me realize the flaw in my own thinking about you. You're perfectly suited for me. I need your calmness to my crazy.
Your reaction to our disagreement was so great. You were so happy we finally found something we disagreed on. And you knew I didn't want to say "I love you" that night, so you said "I love you too", though I protested and told you I loved you anyway, I secretly wasn't feeling it for the first time.
Then you sang "I'll run" to me Thursday, and I knew you were doing it because you loved me, and probably because you knew I hadn't recovered yet.
And on Friday you made me face my fear of what challenges my Ulcerative Colitis might bring us, and helped me know that you weren't going to ever leave because of any.
That afternoon I thought about how much you love me and I finally realized how everything you've told me is true. I knew that before, I guess, I just didn't really *feel* the truth before.
And my heart felt settled in, secure in your love, in loving you