You will find me where the stars cluster
in familiar constellations,
for the courage I could not muster
left me basking in your subtle revelations

Seeking answers and asking questions:

Why is it that we want the ones that don’t see us
instead of the ones that do..?
Why is it so hard to see
the someone that sees you..?

What do you see, when you look into
A clear lake?
When there's a ripple
From skipping stones
When waves rise golden
Against sunlight
Tell me, what do you see
When you try and fathom
With your orphaned eyes.

What do you see
Through orphaned eyes
When you open a window
When waves of warm light
Come creeping in
On dandelion wings
To reach out to you
To tell you
A tale long forgotten from
Your orphaned mind.

What do you hear, when in a meadow
With your buried ears
Footfalls on velvet green; cry of a lone wolf
That follows behind?
Do you hear?
Leaves, whispering secrets
With the coming of a cool Autumn breeze; the silence
Of the night, that leaves behind pearls
On blades of grass?
If only
You could hear anything
Anything at all; save stories
That haunt you with songs
Of a barren land.

Would you stop, nomad?
Stop yourself and breathe life
Into those flowers, trampled
In your trail.
Would you taste your misery
And seep, into
The flavors of your orphaned soul
And be whole?

Yet you abnegate
Subjectivity.
In fear, in denial
Why would you do so?
Why would you do so?

You know you stand
On fractured pieces of you.
Yet you hide behind faces
Masquerading; far away
Why would you ache
To be a wraith; drifting
When you're already home
When you're already home.

~ Your carelessness isn't amusing anymore
   Unusually enough, this time I'm keeping score
~ Your mind is consumed with foolishness
   Restraining my interest less and less
~ Lack of interest in enjoying memories with me
   It just may result in my promise to flee
~ Wondering why I'm changing? Understand on your own
   It hurts me to say, I may have to let you alone
~ But I can't do that, I have no reason to
   This is a phase, I know I love you
~ I've loved you since I saw you, right, yes that's true
   There's just some doubt, my mind's seeking something new
~ But I don't want anything new, we've seen so much together
   These images will fade, we'll be together forever
~ I feel guilty for doubting you, guilty for doubting us
   It's just my mind being fooled, making this unnecessary fuss
~ You love me, but why?
   I'm nothing special, until I die
~ Our spirits have a bond, one impossible to describe
   I love our mind frame, our unbreakable vibe
~ Always keeping me safe, why would I risk that?
   Makes zero sense, just lays there like a mat
~ I got this, we got it, our hearts cannot escape
   This is our place, where we belong, simply fate
               ~Meagan Williams
                1.25.13

I just cannot give up now....
I admit, and have admitted before,
that I struggle with God,
and faith and all that goes along with it...
at the present time I would not consider myself a spiritual person.
I have come to far from where I have started from.
I just cannot give up now.