Unraveling the mystery in her spine
Knots all throughout time
I break it in;
I cave my mark,
I show her how I like to start
I thought after
all these years of
being bitten and scratching sores,
I'd eventually grow a thick enough skin
to keep out the mosquitos.
I was wrong.
Even so, mosquitos are nothing compared
to the itch I've got for you.
You see, mosquito bites are only skin deep,
but I've got this ravenous hunger for you,
gnawing at my bones.
the weapons i use against myself
are ones that can’t be hidden
or taken away
that i’ve turned against myself
the only things that make me think of pain
are long, sharp fingernails
even now i can’t scratch an itch
without my fingers digging into my skin
for the last two years
the only touches my stomach and sides
are soft strokes deciding a path
then sharp, sudden stings
so even after stopping for months
touches to my sides and stomach
make me flinch
just some thoughts
My arm is wrapped in white
My arm is covered in red hard things
My nails and my arms don't get along
They battle a lot
My arm hardly ever wins
I've been struggling with scratching lately
I hear the scratching in my walls all night
It sounds to sinister it gives me a fright
It could be mice or maybe legions
Of some really ******* ****** demons
I hope it's just my ****** up imagination
Not again, my own damnation
Guess I'll just lay here and wait for the screaming
I've past insane, there's no redeeming
picking and scratching
my skin bleeding
the scars all over remind me of certain times in my life
when the stress got too much to handle and I sat in the bathroom for hours
destroying the body that was given to me
burning down my humble abode
just picking and scratching away at my sanity
which I'm not sure I ever really had
the scars that I get comments on daily
'Did you try to hurt yourself?'
'Are you alright?'
'Are you being abused or unsupervised?'
no answer really just staring at them;
whilst picking at my scabs in that blissful agony that I love to feel
i talk about the scars that i bare on the inside all of the time
thought i'd talk about the physically noticeable ones
please feel free to let me know if you too struggle with this :)
I live with a Ghost inside of me.
His cold fingers scratching at the back of my heart constantly.
I live with a Ghost haunting my side.
He is the reason for the subtle breaks in my stride.
And I keep telling myself if I can just leave it all behind,
If I can leave and give myself time...
But not even time can break
what will never completely leave my mind.
It's been three years.
Time does not heal all wounds.